12:00am のご飯

tomato-cream spag bowl...

3 bites later...

gone



eventually, i went out to the sun~~~

after being home for the past 4-5 days..
sleeping at ard 11:00 - 15:00, then waking up 4-5 hrs later...
i hardly see the sun.
its always night and its depressing

i went to MCAC's bbq party for 1hr or so..
picked upy flight tickets..
grocery shopping..
home..
and i died again.

woke up at 11:30 ish to a call from mom n dad..
i miss them soooo much ;_;

i briefly told them whats been happening over the past few days..
of course i told them tt somehow i brought it upon myself..
they did not question/scold me or anything..

they just told me to keep on fighting.
to achieve one's goals, its not always easy
and to not give up


i am just too forgiven, ain't i?



iPhoneからの投稿

2/4 assignments...

DONE.


it's not a good achievement.

least it's better than not submitting at all..

although one of them has been rejected because it is more than a week late..
well..
i brought it upon myself.. so..

now..

i wonder if the other 2 will get rejected as well..


i don't think i can complete them by the end of today..

i have notified my lecturers that they will be late and i hope they are still expecting them.

however, i should email them again to remind them that i will still be submitting those assignments.
so that they will not get rejected..

DX



i never knew this would be so tough ;_;

but life.. is not always easy, right?




meanwhile, i shall take a breather and clean up my room..

it's HELL on earth.
did i mention i also forgot to shower for the WHOLE of yesterday?? ugh.. how gross DX


lots of thank you to everyone who has been cheering me on to get my things done!
it is my own responsibility yet it is you guys who "teach" me about it..

it's pretty embarrassing... especially being at this age
where i should already have learnt to deal with life myself..
*perhaps i was too spoiled and guided by my parents as a child?*

anyways.. really!
thank you so much for being soooo awesome and also reading/listening to my PMS-es >.<!!


i have no guts to tell my parents that i am having difficulties with studying this course because it was me who "fought" with them to get into this course.. OTL
and also..
for the anime idol thing..
i deeply apologize for being such a liar by submitting my application before i finished my assignment.

*please shoot me*

shall i...

quit school??

i am bored of studying to death


although i am *eventually* studying something that i want to study now,
i am not sure if i can continue with it..

given my age, i should have earned a degree last year.
now my classmates are 3 years younger than me.

it's such a difficult fact to accept D:
especially since i used to be younger than everyone else in my class..
plus i've always thought i would be the youngest graduate in my entourage..

this is asian shit.
the younger you graduate, the more worth you seem.



now i have to swallow the fact that..

i am not as worthy anymore.



or am i just being too narrow minded?


i seriously feel like quitting school, get a job with enough pay to survive myself..
and do something that i enjoy - drawing, photography, cosplay.. writing manga and designing outfits..