三男… / my youngest son....



中1の三男に手を焼く毎日。
上の息子たちの同じ頃の私がどうだったか見てみる。
私自身はあまり変わってないな。
中1長男は少しよくなってるように見えたけど、中2で提出物を出してなかったからまだだったのかな。

今日は三男に「なにかをサボる、勉強をしないというのは、自分の選択で、全てあとから返ってくるんだ」と教えてみたけど、変わるかな。
うーん。

I struggle with my youngest son every day.
I looked back me when my twin sons were at the same age.
I found myself not changed.
At that time my first son looked better but he would not submit all the assessments the next year so I found he was not well.
 Today I told my youngest that sabotaging what he should do and not studying were your choices and they would give back to himself in the future.
I am not sure whether he will change or not.
......,

スケジュール調整 / prioritizing meetings

自分のスケジュールがいつもいっぱいで、調整に苦慮している毎日です。
秘書さんがスケジュール調整してくれるので非常に助かっているのですが、いくつか重なりそうな事態になると、どちらを優先するかをもちろん私が選択する必要があり、簡単に優先順位がつけられないものも多く、難しいです。
全く同じタイミングでバッティングする依頼が来れば、かえって難しくなくても、そんなことは当たり前だけどなく、本当にうなるように難しいものもあります。
時間指定で必須で、かつギリギリに(そんなにギリギリでもないんだけど、だいぶ先のがうまってたりする)入ってくるミーティングもあったり。
本当はもっとあけとかなきゃなんだろうけど。

やっていることが多いんだよね、たぶん。


I am struggling with adjusting meetings because my schedule is always full.
I thank for my assistant’s managing my schedule but in case of dupulicating some meetings, I have to prioritize them for sure and it is very hard.
If two requests of meeting come at the same time, it is easier but the case is rare.
Some meetings want to put in the same slot which has already been blocked by another and they force the slot. In this case it is the hardest.
I should have more available time, though.

I might have too many tasks.


三男の面談 / interview with my son’s teachers

うっとおしい人なんかに関わってるほど暇じゃないのだ。
私の目下の注目課題は、次男の大学受験と三男をなんとかすること。

今度は三男の面談がありました。
担任との面談はもちろん、ほぼ全教科の先生とも面談をしました。
ほとんどが外人なので英語で。
三男が「通訳はいりません」と申し込んだので私は通訳なしで、必要な人は通訳がついてくれます。
とにかく中学入ってすぐはひどかったんだけど、まだひどいのです。
ただ、一部の教科の先生たちは、改善が見られるのでこの調子でと言ってくれました。
他は、いまだに相当厳しい評価。
とにかく勉強しないので、できるようにならない。
やる気も見られない。(だから上記なんだけど)
さらに…。
もちろん対策は打ちますが、我が家あるあるの、この中1やる気なし状況に苦戦。
今だけじゃなくて今後ずっとかもと思えるひどさなのでより心配。
先生たちも心配をしてくれてますが…。

いつかなつかしく振り返る時期になるといいな。


I don’t have enough time to care about the annoying person.
My most critical topic is about my second son’s exams for getting into the university and about my youngest son’s recovery from his bad condition for studying.

I had interviewed with my youngest son’s teachers who was his class teacher as well as his teachers of almost all the subjects.
Almost all the teachers speak not Japanese only English.
My son didn’t ask interpreters when he made reservations of the teachers and I communicated with them in English but interpreters can be assigned if needed.
My son was bad in terms of his attitude or studying when he got into the the junior high school and he is still not good.
Some teachers told me that he had improved and he should have kept it.
But the others told me that he was still in the bad condition.
He doesn’t study so that he cannot get good results.
He doesn’t also have any motivation. ( It is one of the reason why I mentioned above.
I was told more.....
I am sure to take some actions about them but I am struggling with the demotivating boy as I struggled with my twin boys who were at the same age as he.
I am worried about it more because he looks too bad to expect his brightening future.
His teachers are also worried about him, though.

I wish this concern would be a funny story some day.

うっとおしい / annoying

去年の年末のブログを見たら、うっとおしい人に辟易としてたみたいなんだけど、なんと今でも辟易としてます。
特にここ数日、うっとおしさマックス。
みんなめんどくさいからコミュニケーションなんか取りたがらないわけですよ。
それを仕方なく取ると、いちいち絡んでくる。
あーうっとおしい。
その人のせいで会社を辞めた人までいるからね。
公害だね。
常に前向きに捉えるようにはするけど、そういうのを全部打ち砕くうっとおしさ。
行動を改めてくれないかな、本当に。
ないだろうけど。

気にしない気にしない。


I looked back my blog and found the entry about an annoying person at the end of last year and I am still exhausted from the person now.
For recent a few days, the person’s annoying was max.
Nobody wants to communicate to the person because the person is annoying.
I reluctantly communicated with the person and the person picked fights with me.
How annoying the person is!
My colleague left the company because of the person.
The person must be pollution.
Although I always think of it positively, the person is annoying enough for me to give up positive.
I hope that he will revise the person’s behavior.
I am afraid that he cannot.

Don’t care. Don’t care.

次男との会話 / conversation with my second son

次男との三者面談の帰り道での会話。
行きたい学部は明確な次男。
でもどこの大学に行くかは、学力で決まる。
というのを受験戦略にしているんだけど、ある意味、第一希望不明瞭でもある。
学力だけで決まってしまうのは中学受験と一緒で、中学は結局第一希望には入れなかった。
なので次男に聞いてみた。

私「中学は第一希望じゃなかったけど、6年間通ってどうだった？」
次男「いいことと悪いことがあったよ。どこに通ってもそうじゃない？」
私「じゃあ、よかったんだね。クラリネットが上手くなったのは本当によかったよね。」
次男「あれはよかったな。中1のときにした僕の決断が人生最高の決断だったな。水泳部に入ろうと思ってたのに、見学に行って結局吹奏楽部にしたんだよね。」

ということで、次男はどうやらどこに行っても、楽しむところは楽しめる人なんだなと確認できたので、安心しました。
一人暮らしになる可能性が高く、実は不安みたいだけど、チャレンジするらしい。
兄弟の中で最もチャレンジ精神が強いのです。

よい結果になりますように。


I had a conversation with my second son on our way from school after the meeting with his teacher.
He has decided the specialty which he wants to learn clearly.
His academic skills will decide which university he will join.
That Is our strategy.
Therefore his best university is not clear.
His academic skills decided his junior high school as well.
So I asked him to make sure his will.

Me “How was your school life for 6 years even though you couldn’t enter your best school?”
Son “I have both of good experiences and bad experiences. I think any schools have both good part and bad one.”
Me “Therefore it has been good for you. It has been the best for you to get the clarinet skills, hasn’t it?”
Son “Yes, it has. My best decision was to select the brassband club when I was on the first grade at junior high school. I was supposed to join the swimming club but I changed my mind after the trial term.”

Therefore I found that my second son is a person who can enjoy something he likes even though he goes to any school even though he doesn’t know well.
He will have possibilities to live alone after getting into the university and he has some concerns about it but he will try.
He has the strongest challenge sprites of my son’s.

I hope his will make good achievements.

学部説明会 / a session of a department of the uni

長男の大学入学に向けた学部説明会があらました。
親向けとそのあとは本人たち向け。
親向けのは、盛りだくさんの説明でした。
去年も聞いているので、ベースはだいたい知っていますが、常に変わり続ける努力をされているそうで、いろいろアップデートがあり、これからが楽しみです。
長男が大学のいいとこを存分に活用して成長してくれたらいいな。
いや、してくれ。

I had a session about a department of the university which my first son will go to next year.
There were two sessions and one  was or the parents and another was for the students.
For the parents a professor explained a lot.
I was explained last year as well and I had already known the basic information.
But the department is trying to change constantly, they had additional information, and I was excited about thinking of my son’s future.
I hope he will utilize good things the department has and grow up well.
No, he will have to do so.

古い友達 / my friends

昨夜、古い友達で集まりました。
昔から、話してると不快感が湧く人がいるんだけど、その人が変わってないのです。
自分すごい、みたいな考え方で、それを保つために弱者を愛す的な。
しかも冗談じゃなくて本気で。笑
私は聞いてて居心地が悪いけど(でもなぜか嫌いではない)、たぶん向こうも私がそういうのを聞いて素直にすごいねと言わないタイプだから、あまり居心地が良くないんだろうな。
たまには悪くないね。

I met with my friends whom I knew when I was a university student.
One of them have made me uncomfortable since he was young.
He thinks he is the coolest and likes those who are not cooler than he in order to make him the coolest.
But he is not kidding but serious.
I am always uncomfortable with his comments and he is also uncomfortable with me as an audience of his speech because I am assumed that I don’t agree with him.
I don’t dislike him.
It is good to sometimes meet with him.


”もみじ” / Maple



ちょうど昨日の朝、庭のもみじを愛でました。
寒いのは嫌いだけど、もみじの季節は好きです。

I just enjoyed maple in my garden yesterday.
I don’t like coldness but I love the season when we can see maples.


次男面談 / meeting with my second son’s teacher

高3の次男の学校に三者面談に行きました。
最終的に志望校を確定するのは、センター試験後だけど、ほぼほぼどこを受けるかは仮決め。
勉強方法も確認しました。
がんばろう！

My second son and I had a meeting with his teacher to discuss what universities he will apply to.
We will finally decide them after the university center exam but we previously decided them.
We made sure how to study.
I hope he will succeed.

三男について悩む / My concern about...

何度か書いてるけど、三男を見ると私の生きてきた価値観からは将来が非常に不安だ。
と思いながらも、世の中も変わっている中、彼が活躍できる場所もあるんじゃないかと考えるようにしており、過剰に心配しすぎないようにしてもいる。
とはいえ、先は見えない。

仕事で、やらなきゃいけないことをちゃんとやれない人をたくさん見かける。
社会人として本当に困る。
Outcome ベースは必要で、本人なりに頑張っているからとできていなくても周りが評価するのは本当に困る。
頑張ってるの定義も不明確な中。

私は人前で話したりするのは得意で、本番で最も力を発揮するタイプなのだけど、受験はあまり得意じゃなかった。
結果だけで、私が受験が得意に違いないと思う人もいるんだろうけど、社会人になって受験から真の意味で解放されたときの喜びは今でも覚えている。
つまりあまり得意じゃないことをずっとやってたんだよね。
決められたことをやるのはすごくストレスなのだ。
あれが役に立ってるのか疑問だけど、決められたことをストレスを感じながらでもそれなりにやれるのは受験をやった効果なのか。
ただ、自分でやることを考えて実行するとか、そのあたりのスキルは受験で培ったものではない。
前述のちゃんとできない社会人はそれを指している。
学校の成績は必ずしも関係ないんだ。

つまり、三男みたいに勉強系は何も一生懸命にならず、お友達とコミュニケーションばかりとる人にも、社会人になったらチャンスがあるもんなのか。
だとしてもそこまでどうサバイブするか。

やはり悩ましい。


As I wrote some times, I am worried about my youngest son from my experience.
But I am not worried about him too much by thinking that he will have possibilities to survive well because the world is changing.
But I cannot see his future clearly.

I know many people can’t do what they should do.
I think they are trouble makers.
They are sometimes evaluated in doing their best and I don’t think it is good.
Doing their best is not defined clearly, though.

I am good at speaking in front of audiences and I perform in front of audiences better than when practicing but I was not good at passing exams.
Although somebody thinks me as being good at it in terms of my achievements, I remember a joy when I joined the first company and found me released from exams.
That is I had kept studying for exams even though I was not good at it.
I feel very stressed about doing things to be decided how to do.
Currently I can do tasks to do with a little stress and it might be an effect of that I studied for exams.
But my ability to think of what to do by myself and execute it is not from studying for exams.
Also the people who can’t do what they should do mentioned above are lack of abilities not to get at school.
I think that achievements at school does not necessarily connect to success at office.

I hope that my youngest son who doesn’t study hard and tends to communicate with his friends will have some opportunities when he is adult.
If so I  not sure how to survive until then.

Therefore I have many concerns about him.