
fill me
with lies and sinister dreams
make me beg
"more, more" from down on my knees
because my eyes are open
i now see
that i am the nothing
you are the beam
blind am i
to the ends of the means
where dew drops dry
and birds fall dead from the trees
after all you have left me
flightless in my morbid red sea
with lips full of cobweb kisses
chained at the seams
i sink beneath the surface
in over my head
gossamer shackles heavy as lead
and dead faces stare up
from deep places
grasping with bony claws
to drag me under
to drown me within my flaws
and my brain flashes in wonder
as the last synopses flash
in a revelation like thunder
in a resounding crash
i finally see that i'm the architect
the spider that weaves
the webs i choke on are made by me
so i cocooned myself in my own neglect

scattered, splattered around my feet
do you see it, there upon the floor?
it's all that will be left of me if I stick here
ignored and ignorant I stay, stagnant
murdered my heart and annihilated my soul
every day you deny me, turn me out cold
you smile happily as I kick rocks of pain
shuffle my feet and drag ass to a loveless bed
do you see me here upon your mantle?
the place where you left me to collect dust
pleasing and pleasant to look upon
as your eyes pass over me and never stop to see
you don't even know me anymore, never read my words
you will stay blissfully unaware as I kick rocks of hate
cover my mouth as I watch you block me away
do you hear me scream silently with my eyes, stuck?
as I watch from across the room waiting
shaking in the agony of my defeated attempt
I used to say those three little words with feeling
just to see you laugh them off
still I remember the times you've pushed me away
shunned my kisses and told me to kick my rocks
unfortunately the day will come soon and
you will see me, hear me that day for the last time
because I have fallen from your mantle, your pretty shelf
I have broke, I have reassembled those pieces myself
I now refuse to be told to kick my rocks
refuse to do anything but dance with my words,
my new macabre dance
I will be loved for who I am one way or the other



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Life becomes harder for us when we live for others, but it also becomes richer and happier.

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