So, I'm trying something different here, posting in English.
Ever had an experience in which, even just for a moment, you feel like you're living a dream, like you can feel your own disassociation from reality?
This is what I feel like almost all the time when I'm working here as a "comedian." It's not just the fact that I've never pursued a career like this before. It has more, I think, to do with the fact that I have distinct personality differences when I'm interacting in English versus when I'm interacting in Japanese.
I'm a positive person but inherently cynical. I love people, but I also find it fascinating to look for flaws in people. I'm sarcastic, intruding, and somewhat sardonic, when I want to be. I find all the emojis and other pseudo communication tools that people in this country use in abundance to be extremely asinine. And, I find that the way a lot of people work here to be quite inefficient and not up to global standards. This doesn't mean I have any degree of disdain for this country; it just means that I'm a person who finds it interesting to identify differences, weaknesses, and defects.
These are all areas of my personality that are either too complex or advanced for me to reflect in my Japanese personality. I've really only had time to develop my Japanese self when I came here toward the end of 2014, so I'm far from being used to interacting in Japanese. So when it comes to what you see me as on Japanese TV, what you get is a very two-dimensional, incomplete, superficial view of who I really am. And it frustrates me to no end that these are things I can't (yet) fully express in Japanese, and you know what -- my sarcastic, cynical, intruding self may not even be accepted in this country.
Anyway. A major rant to see how many English speakers read this thing. Probably only a few, but even if there's one, it's worth it for me to occasionally have a conversation with readers in English.
Have a good fracking night! (Battlestar Galactica FTW)