両方働く場合 when both parents work
A reader gave me an interesting comment
読者から面白いコメントがはいてきた。 英語のコメントありがとう！ ワザワザ英語で頑張って、ありがとう。
How about when both parents work?
親。。。二人とも働く時？
Well......
まああ。。。
I have asked around, asked all my friends and kind of surveyed everyone
周りの友達などを聞いてみたけど
It seems that, quite often, even when the wife works.......
奥さんが働く時。。。
Most of the chores, cooking, cleaning...etc.....is still done by her
家事など。。。。。。まだ彼女専門
On Saturday and Sunday, their husbands cooperate by taking the kids out the the park or something
土日、旦那が子供を公演に連れてて行くかも
I used to think that women were relaxing at home while dad was taking the kids out
昔い公園で子供連れパパを見た時、思ったのは”あああ、良かった。。。ママは家でゆっくりしている”
But after asking around...I got a good picture of reality
けど。。。実際違った
Usually mom is at home, running around... doing all the chores she could not finish on the weekday.....hoping to finish and get just 5 minutes for herself, a quick sip of coffee or tea
普段。。。ママは家で休んでいない。家でバタバタ家事、洗濯物。。。平日全て出来ない物をやっている！ 最後。。。時間が残ったら。。。。。。。お茶は。。。ちょっとでも飲める。
Some husbands are good at helping out
ある旦那さんは。。。よく奥さんを手伝う
Dropping off and picking up kids from school, daycare
子供のお迎えとか。。。
And cooking on weekends
週末頑張って料理を作っている
But if you ask me, most Japanese husbands HAVE BEEN SPOILED BY THEIR DARN MOMMIES
けど。。。私に意見だけかもしらない。。。 フツの日本人の男性は。。。ずっと小さい頃から、ママから甘えちゃった
After marriage, they don't change much
結婚しても。。。余り変わらない
That is, unless the wife demands it
奥さんは厳しい場合、変わる人いるけど
Some husbands are very uncooperative
協力しない男性います
Men who have lived a long bachelor life are a little better
結婚する前、ずっと独身だったの男性は。。。。。少しいいほう。。。
More of them are able to cook and clean
その男性たちは。。。少し料理作れる、家を掃除できる
＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊
I asked my friend why she did not prepare her sons to become good husbands
友達に聞いてみた”なぜ息子を甘えているの？”
She just shrugged and continues to pamper her boys
けど。。。彼女。。。余り返事ない。。。 ずっと何でも息子さんのためにやってあげる
Poor future wives.............
可哀そう。。。未来の奥さん
For women who are still single out there
まだ独身の女性読者たちへ：
You will find yourself a lot happier if you marry a man who is very willing to do more than his share of the work
家事を出来る男性、子供が好きな男性と結婚すれば、幸せ家庭を作れる！
Even if a man cannot do it...if he is teach-able and willing...it's better than a lazy man who is unwilling. Unwilling ones will never change...maybe worsen after marriage.
付き合っている男性。。。もし家事、料理はダメの場合。。。もし習う興味ある、頑張る気ある。。。少し”ＨＯＰＥ”があるよ。 けど。。。彼氏が怠け者、頑固の物の場合。。。あああ。。。大変かもしらない。 教えてもダメだ。 結婚して。。。もっと酷くなるかも。
Always remember the bottom line: (sorry, I often repeat this line in my blog)
絶対忘れないで。。。私よくブログに書いている何ですが。。。また言うね。
It is always easier to marry than unmarry (divorce!)
結婚するのは簡単。 けど。。。逆は。。。とても難しい。
＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊
I have a non-Japanese friend who is doing her phD program
私の外人の友達は。。。今博士プローグラム中。。。すごく、すごく頑張っています！
Her non-Japanese husband is incredibly supportive
外人の旦那さんは。。。素敵な人、彼女は彼に頼ること出来る
She is able to go on business trips abroad, even weeks at a time
彼女は何週間の海外出張も出来る！
And what's more - he is the one who wanted her to embark on the tough phD program
しかも。。。彼が彼女を博士プローグラムをやって欲しかった！
But the great thing is, he's there to back her up and support her and raise their two kids (one who is Lina's age)
けど、いい旦那、いいパパです。 一人の子供は。。。リナと同じ年齢です
Though......unlike Japanese dads, he has the flexibility to help his wife.
けど。。。彼は日本人のパパと違って。。。仕事は”フレックスタイム”で楽！ だから、沢山奥さんを助けられる
He can go to work at flexible hours, allowing him to drop off and pick up the kids
仕事は。。。時間余り決まっていないので、簡単に子供の迎などを出来る
Japanese men.......if if they want to support their wives....are restricted by harsh working times and perhaps long commutes
日本人の男性は可哀そう。。。奥さんを助けてあげたくても。。。ダメ。。。働く時間は厳しいとか。。。通勤は長いとか。
The terrible thing is...a "friend" of hers...seemed to look down on her decision to future her education
酷いのは。。。私の友達の友達は。。。彼女の博士判断を”悪い”と思った
This friend said to my friend "ohhhh, your poor children and husband. Your family will definitely suffer"
その友達は私の友達に言ったのは”あああああ、可哀そう、子供と旦那さん！ キット家族全員を苦しむよ”
What kind of "friend" says that?!?!??!
いやいや。。。。。。。酷い”友達”ですね！
A real friend will be there and say things like "it must be hard, but if you need any help, count on me, okay?"
いい友達の返事は”博士プローグラムは大変だろう。。。けど何か手伝うことがあれば、遠慮なく言ってね”
If you have a very supportive husband, going back to work (after having kids) will be much easier and you won't feel the extra burden
あなたをちゃんと支える夫が入れば、子供を産んで、仕事に戻るのは楽。。。 そんなに大変じゃないと思う
But.......if your husband is lazy and not going to help out, do his share around the house........going back to work is going to be especially stressful and you'll be irritated as ever!
けど。。。旦那はあなたを支えないと。。。キット大変、毎日イライラします
**************************************
My friend in Tokyo said she relies on all the resources around her
東京の友達言ったのは。。。周りのサポートプログラムを利用している
She has a pretty supportive husband but, like I said......husbands in Japan are really busy with their own jobs too
彼女の旦那はけっこ助かるタイプ。。。けど。。。前言ってたとうり。。。日本の男性は。。。自分の仕事で忙しいので、たまに。。。もっと助けてあげたくても、無理
The great thing about Japan these days...is better developed network for raising children
今の日本の良かったのは。。。少し子育ては楽になった
Things that were not available to women decades ago in Japan
何十年前なかったサービスは。。。今沢山有ります
In the past...women could only rely on her parents if they lived close by
昔い。。。自分の親は近くに住むと子供の面倒とか。。。をおまかせる
These days - amazing public daycare.
最近。。。公立の保育園、すごい！
Not too expensive, amazing daycare workers...for a reasonable fee (until pretty late too, 7pm!)
そんなに高くない、保育士は素晴らしいし、時間も７時まで
And jidokan. So when your child finishes elementary school around 3pm, they can go to the public sports hall to be watched by some adults. (for a really reasonable fee!)
そして。。。児童館。。。子供は小学校が終わってから、自分の家じゃなくて。。。児童館に行って、友達と一緒遊んで。 安全、安心、そんなに高くない。
But...the only downside is that these services are often so popular they are already at maximum capacity
けど。。。このサービスは大人気ので。。。。。たまに。。。人気で入れない時ある
And these days some hospitals even have daycare even for sick kids, allowing even mothers of sick kids to work.
そして、最近。。。ある病院は。。。病気の子供も預ける！ 子供は病気でもママは安心に仕事に行ける。
So.......for women in Japan, even when husbands are not helpful (or just cannot help)....Japan is being more helpful.
だから、日本のママのためにのサービスは。。。段々ずつ増えてきた
So more and more women are choosing the path of becoming a single mom.
ある女性は。。。シングルママの道を選んでいる
Why bother staying married......with an unsupportive husband.
何でも手伝てあげない旦那さんがいる。。。
After calculating everything, they figure, it's not worth it in the end
色々頭で計算して。。。結局。。。彼がいなくても同じ
Some women who make a decent salary make the choice to leave
給料高い女性は。。。シングルママの道を選ぶ人が増えた
But......this is so negative.
ごめん、ごめん。。。少し悲観的の事を書いちゃった
There are lots of helpful fathers...fathers who cook, clean, and do much more!
ちゃんと奥さんを手伝てあげるパパ達いるよ！ 料理する、掃除できるなど
But........I will admit......far and few between.
ただ。。。。。。。すごく、すごく少ない
In the past...young women, when asked, must have said that a rich husband is prized
昔い。。。女性たちに聞いたら、キット皆をこれを言います”お金持ちは大事”
But these days... I think men who can cook and clean are much more prized than those who have money
けど。。。最近の女性は。。。お金より。。。 家事、料理、子育て出来る男性は”金”です！
Do you agree?
どう思う、皆さん？
読者から面白いコメントがはいてきた。 英語のコメントありがとう！ ワザワザ英語で頑張って、ありがとう。
How about when both parents work?
親。。。二人とも働く時？
Well......
まああ。。。
I have asked around, asked all my friends and kind of surveyed everyone
周りの友達などを聞いてみたけど
It seems that, quite often, even when the wife works.......
奥さんが働く時。。。
Most of the chores, cooking, cleaning...etc.....is still done by her
家事など。。。。。。まだ彼女専門
On Saturday and Sunday, their husbands cooperate by taking the kids out the the park or something
土日、旦那が子供を公演に連れてて行くかも
I used to think that women were relaxing at home while dad was taking the kids out
昔い公園で子供連れパパを見た時、思ったのは”あああ、良かった。。。ママは家でゆっくりしている”
But after asking around...I got a good picture of reality
けど。。。実際違った
Usually mom is at home, running around... doing all the chores she could not finish on the weekday.....hoping to finish and get just 5 minutes for herself, a quick sip of coffee or tea
普段。。。ママは家で休んでいない。家でバタバタ家事、洗濯物。。。平日全て出来ない物をやっている！ 最後。。。時間が残ったら。。。。。。。お茶は。。。ちょっとでも飲める。
Some husbands are good at helping out
ある旦那さんは。。。よく奥さんを手伝う
Dropping off and picking up kids from school, daycare
子供のお迎えとか。。。
And cooking on weekends
週末頑張って料理を作っている
But if you ask me, most Japanese husbands HAVE BEEN SPOILED BY THEIR DARN MOMMIES
けど。。。私に意見だけかもしらない。。。 フツの日本人の男性は。。。ずっと小さい頃から、ママから甘えちゃった
After marriage, they don't change much
結婚しても。。。余り変わらない
That is, unless the wife demands it
奥さんは厳しい場合、変わる人いるけど
Some husbands are very uncooperative
協力しない男性います
Men who have lived a long bachelor life are a little better
結婚する前、ずっと独身だったの男性は。。。。。少しいいほう。。。
More of them are able to cook and clean
その男性たちは。。。少し料理作れる、家を掃除できる
＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊
I asked my friend why she did not prepare her sons to become good husbands
友達に聞いてみた”なぜ息子を甘えているの？”
She just shrugged and continues to pamper her boys
けど。。。彼女。。。余り返事ない。。。 ずっと何でも息子さんのためにやってあげる
Poor future wives.............
可哀そう。。。未来の奥さん
For women who are still single out there
まだ独身の女性読者たちへ：
You will find yourself a lot happier if you marry a man who is very willing to do more than his share of the work
家事を出来る男性、子供が好きな男性と結婚すれば、幸せ家庭を作れる！
Even if a man cannot do it...if he is teach-able and willing...it's better than a lazy man who is unwilling. Unwilling ones will never change...maybe worsen after marriage.
付き合っている男性。。。もし家事、料理はダメの場合。。。もし習う興味ある、頑張る気ある。。。少し”ＨＯＰＥ”があるよ。 けど。。。彼氏が怠け者、頑固の物の場合。。。あああ。。。大変かもしらない。 教えてもダメだ。 結婚して。。。もっと酷くなるかも。
Always remember the bottom line: (sorry, I often repeat this line in my blog)
絶対忘れないで。。。私よくブログに書いている何ですが。。。また言うね。
It is always easier to marry than unmarry (divorce!)
結婚するのは簡単。 けど。。。逆は。。。とても難しい。
＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊
I have a non-Japanese friend who is doing her phD program
私の外人の友達は。。。今博士プローグラム中。。。すごく、すごく頑張っています！
Her non-Japanese husband is incredibly supportive
外人の旦那さんは。。。素敵な人、彼女は彼に頼ること出来る
She is able to go on business trips abroad, even weeks at a time
彼女は何週間の海外出張も出来る！
And what's more - he is the one who wanted her to embark on the tough phD program
しかも。。。彼が彼女を博士プローグラムをやって欲しかった！
But the great thing is, he's there to back her up and support her and raise their two kids (one who is Lina's age)
けど、いい旦那、いいパパです。 一人の子供は。。。リナと同じ年齢です
Though......unlike Japanese dads, he has the flexibility to help his wife.
けど。。。彼は日本人のパパと違って。。。仕事は”フレックスタイム”で楽！ だから、沢山奥さんを助けられる
He can go to work at flexible hours, allowing him to drop off and pick up the kids
仕事は。。。時間余り決まっていないので、簡単に子供の迎などを出来る
Japanese men.......if if they want to support their wives....are restricted by harsh working times and perhaps long commutes
日本人の男性は可哀そう。。。奥さんを助けてあげたくても。。。ダメ。。。働く時間は厳しいとか。。。通勤は長いとか。
The terrible thing is...a "friend" of hers...seemed to look down on her decision to future her education
酷いのは。。。私の友達の友達は。。。彼女の博士判断を”悪い”と思った
This friend said to my friend "ohhhh, your poor children and husband. Your family will definitely suffer"
その友達は私の友達に言ったのは”あああああ、可哀そう、子供と旦那さん！ キット家族全員を苦しむよ”
What kind of "friend" says that?!?!??!
いやいや。。。。。。。酷い”友達”ですね！
A real friend will be there and say things like "it must be hard, but if you need any help, count on me, okay?"
いい友達の返事は”博士プローグラムは大変だろう。。。けど何か手伝うことがあれば、遠慮なく言ってね”
If you have a very supportive husband, going back to work (after having kids) will be much easier and you won't feel the extra burden
あなたをちゃんと支える夫が入れば、子供を産んで、仕事に戻るのは楽。。。 そんなに大変じゃないと思う
But.......if your husband is lazy and not going to help out, do his share around the house........going back to work is going to be especially stressful and you'll be irritated as ever!
けど。。。旦那はあなたを支えないと。。。キット大変、毎日イライラします
**************************************
My friend in Tokyo said she relies on all the resources around her
東京の友達言ったのは。。。周りのサポートプログラムを利用している
She has a pretty supportive husband but, like I said......husbands in Japan are really busy with their own jobs too
彼女の旦那はけっこ助かるタイプ。。。けど。。。前言ってたとうり。。。日本の男性は。。。自分の仕事で忙しいので、たまに。。。もっと助けてあげたくても、無理
The great thing about Japan these days...is better developed network for raising children
今の日本の良かったのは。。。少し子育ては楽になった
Things that were not available to women decades ago in Japan
何十年前なかったサービスは。。。今沢山有ります
In the past...women could only rely on her parents if they lived close by
昔い。。。自分の親は近くに住むと子供の面倒とか。。。をおまかせる
These days - amazing public daycare.
最近。。。公立の保育園、すごい！
Not too expensive, amazing daycare workers...for a reasonable fee (until pretty late too, 7pm!)
そんなに高くない、保育士は素晴らしいし、時間も７時まで
And jidokan. So when your child finishes elementary school around 3pm, they can go to the public sports hall to be watched by some adults. (for a really reasonable fee!)
そして。。。児童館。。。子供は小学校が終わってから、自分の家じゃなくて。。。児童館に行って、友達と一緒遊んで。 安全、安心、そんなに高くない。
But...the only downside is that these services are often so popular they are already at maximum capacity
けど。。。このサービスは大人気ので。。。。。たまに。。。人気で入れない時ある
And these days some hospitals even have daycare even for sick kids, allowing even mothers of sick kids to work.
そして、最近。。。ある病院は。。。病気の子供も預ける！ 子供は病気でもママは安心に仕事に行ける。
So.......for women in Japan, even when husbands are not helpful (or just cannot help)....Japan is being more helpful.
だから、日本のママのためにのサービスは。。。段々ずつ増えてきた
So more and more women are choosing the path of becoming a single mom.
ある女性は。。。シングルママの道を選んでいる
Why bother staying married......with an unsupportive husband.
何でも手伝てあげない旦那さんがいる。。。
After calculating everything, they figure, it's not worth it in the end
色々頭で計算して。。。結局。。。彼がいなくても同じ
Some women who make a decent salary make the choice to leave
給料高い女性は。。。シングルママの道を選ぶ人が増えた
But......this is so negative.
ごめん、ごめん。。。少し悲観的の事を書いちゃった
There are lots of helpful fathers...fathers who cook, clean, and do much more!
ちゃんと奥さんを手伝てあげるパパ達いるよ！ 料理する、掃除できるなど
But........I will admit......far and few between.
ただ。。。。。。。すごく、すごく少ない
In the past...young women, when asked, must have said that a rich husband is prized
昔い。。。女性たちに聞いたら、キット皆をこれを言います”お金持ちは大事”
But these days... I think men who can cook and clean are much more prized than those who have money
けど。。。最近の女性は。。。お金より。。。 家事、料理、子育て出来る男性は”金”です！
Do you agree?
どう思う、皆さん？