自分が3回のがん宣告を受けている最中は自分で精一杯だったけど、数年後に父のがん宣告を受けた際に周りの気持ちを初めて知った。
ある意味周りの方が辛いのかもとも思った。
神様は、私にその強さは今ないから、その役割を家族にあげて、私を本人にしてくれたのかなとも思った。
私は自分の身体で乗り越えるしかないけど、周りは何もできないと感じる。本当は本人にものすごく支えになってても周りは感じずらい。
家族は私の要だった。
無言で支えてくれる父、気を遣って一緒にいてくれる母、一緒に何でもしてくれる妹たち。
I was too occupied with myself while I went through the cancer diagnosis 3times in 50days. When my father got cancer few years later, I experienced for the first time how it felt to be the people around them.
There’s no comparison in pain, but I wonder whether it was mentally harder being the people around the loved one who got cancer. Maybe God gave me this role because I was too weak to be the people surrounding the cancer patient in my family.
The cancer patient’s body has to go through it themselves. The people around them feel like they can’t share the pain, even though they emotionally do, and even if they are a huge support, it’s hard to feel.
My family was my rock. My silent Dad, my Mom who comes with me to hospital appointments and takes care of me, my sisters who do everything to support me.