＞I suppose the way children are pretending extremely good inorder to protect themselves probably is to be common in the world,
日本文化の中で、子供がよい子を演じるようになる理由の一つ、きっと主としてよい子を演じる理由になっていると思いますが、それを述べてみたいと思います。
日本文化の中で、子どもが親の意に沿ったことをしないと、意に沿ったことに逆らうと、親は親の理由で子どもを叱ります。きっと親は理詰めで、時には感情的に子どもを叱るのでしょう。しかし子供の方は何故親が自分を叱っているのか分からないのです。その叱られている状態から速く逃げ出したいだけです。心を楽にしたいだけです。
何度も申し上げていますが子供の心と大人の心と異なるからです。子どもはただ単に親に叱られていて辛いと感じているだけです。叱られた内容を悪いことだから今後は止めようと、考えていません。学習していません。それが出来るのは大人の心になってからです。
この親から叱られている場所から子どもは逃げられませんから、親の怒りを受け続けています。そして親は最後に、「分かったの？」とか「分かったと言いなさい」とかでその場を納めようとします。子どもはその場から早く逃げたいので、分かっていなくても、「分かった」と言って、親の怒りから逃げることができます。
このことは、親が言っていることを理解できなくても、親が希望する「分かった」という言葉を言うことで、親の怒りから逃げることができることを日本の子どもは学習します。これがよい子を演じることを学習することの始まりです。其れ以後、親だけでなく、他の大人から、先生から、いじめをする友達からただ単に逃げるために、分かったと言葉で、行動で表現するようになります。この子どものよい子を演じた経験から、色々な場面で辛さから逃げるために、よい子を演じるようになります。
I would like to talk about one of the reasons why japanise children act like good boys or girls in Japanese culture, and I think it is the main reason why they act like good boys and girls.
In Japanese culture, if a child does not do what their parents want, or goes against what their parents want, parents will scold them for their reasons. I'm sure parents scold their children logically and sometimes emotionally. However, children do not understand why their parents are scolding them. they just want to quickly escape from that scolding situation. they just want to put their mind at ease.
As I have said many times, the mind of a child is different from the mind of an adult. The child simply feels that being scolded by his or her parents is painful. They don't think that what they are scolded for is bad and they will stop doing it in the future. Children cannot understand why they are scolded. You can do that only when you become an adult.
Children cannot escape from being scolded by their parents, so they continue to suffer from their parents' anger. At the end, the parent tries to calm the situation by asking things like, ``Did you understand?'' or ``Tell me you understand.'' Children want to quickly escape from the situation, so even if they don't understand, they can say ``I understand'' and escape from their parents' anger.
This means that Japanese children learn that even if they don't understand what their parents are saying, they can escape their parents' anger by saying the words "I understand" that their parents want to say. This is the beginning of learning to play the good boy. After that, they begin to express their understanding through words and actions simply to escape from not only their parents but also other adults, teachers, and bullying friends. From this experience of playing the role of a good child, they began to play the role of a good child in various situations in order to escape from hardship.