I want to dig deeper into self-discovery. Work is just working now. Teaching is okay, but it is not something I want to do as a passion or as one of my future purposes. I want to dig into what I like, my passions, hobbies, interests, and what makes me feel content and happy with my life right now and here onward. After seeing that I like expressive writing, after replying to Katsu's email tonight, such as poetry writing and blogging, and singing, these acts, in a way freeing me from my own trap of self-sabotage, and straying from the sense of needing to be someone or something that is not truly where or who I want to be, simply because society expects me to.
I want to have a life where I can relax simply to relax and cuddle with Mehdi and go on trips with him, while also having a passion/hobby/or second purpose apart from being a future wife, and improving myself.
Is loving to sing and express myself, and word-vomiting on my blog selfish since I enjoy the sense of simply expressing myself? Are there more ways I can learn to express myself and my thoughts?
It seems there are many ways to express yourself. Through, writing, dance, music, style of hair, clothing, cooking even.
I will eventually write more, but in the meantime I will get my hands a bit dirty and try making something for a change, in the kitchen. I dread cooking since I am bad at it, but I want to learn to cook better, for myself, for us, and of course, see it as fun instead of a chore.