diary
So, like, my girlfriend is actually gonna be moving back to her hometown next month, and lately she’s been saying she really needs to start packing soon. Honestly, since yesterday, she’s been looking a little more tired than usual, you know? And of course, I asked her if she wanted me to help out — like, I’d totally be down to do whatever she needs — but she just smiles and says she’s fine and that she’ll do it herself. And I mean, obviously I respect that, but at the same time, I just really, really want to help her even a little bit, to take some of the stress off her shoulders if I can.I guess deep down, what I’m really hoping for is that one day she’ll feel totally comfortable just telling me whatever’s on her mind, no holding back, no feeling like she has to do everything on her own. But, you know, she always jokes like, “Well, I’m Canadian, so saying sorry is basically part of my DNA,” and every time she says that, it kind of makes me realize that maybe I’m not doing enough yet to make her feel like she doesn’t have to apologize for anything with me. And honestly, that stings a little, because I really wanna be that safe place for her.I keep wondering, like, what can I do to make our conversations — and just, like, our whole relationship — feel even more comfortable and easy for her? I’d actually love it if she could just be super selfish with me, in the best way, like telling me all the things she wants or needs without even thinking twice about it. In my head, it feels like that would make us even stronger, but then I start overthinking, like, maybe that’s just me being selfish in a weird way too, you know?I totally get that rushing things is not the answer, and that relationships are all about patience and time and trust and all that good stuff. But... I can’t lie, the fact that we’re about to do long distance soon has me lowkey panicking a bit. I just really, really wanna do whatever I can now, while we’re still close, to make our relationship as solid and happy and strong as it can be. And not just for now — I wanna build something that’ll stay strong even when we’re far apart. Like, I want us to keep growing and getting better together, no matter what.
