Robin: Ooh, my story's on. Ted, pay attention. Carl, turn it up.
(newscast on TV)
Robin: I'm here with Ellen Pierce, New York's premiere matchmaker. Ellen, your company, Love Solutions boasts a 100% success rate. What's your secret?
Ellen: Science. Everything in life can be broken down to ones and zeros, even love.
All I have to do is input the variables, run the algorithm, and presto manifesto, you have a soulmate, and it works. Just ask all of my happy couples. And these are just the attractive ones, I have more photos in the bathroom.
Robin: Love Solution's Ellen Pierce, a beacon of hope for New York city's lovelorn. Robin Scherbatsky...
BAR
Barney: Was that chick at the end really a client?
Robin: Yes.
Barney: We're signing up.
Ted: What?
Barney: Ted, these chicks are desperate and hot. That's a perfect cocktail. Shake well, then sleep with.
Ted: I'm not going to a matchmaker. That's like giving up. It's the man version of getting a cat.
Marshall: No, it wasn't a cockroach. It had fur and only mammals have fur.
Lily: It was a cockroach.
Marshall: Come on, Lily, the only way that that was a cockroach was if it was wearing the skin of a mouse it just killed.
Lily: Oh my God.
(Lily grabs Barney's drink as he's about to take a drink from it and drinks it herself)
Barney: Come on.
