what I;ve done??

what i've done?? in the last day before my birthday...
о(ж＞▽＜)ｙ ☆
because of that im still blank in my mind...ofcourse because i've done something stupid that i couldnt forgiving for my self..

its not asolutely regret,im also happy after that..
i really confused with that..
i definitely will loose him no matter what..
he have got me everything..
yes we do something unforgiveable thing...\a gig sin.

whatever he will think about me. but ido because of love, and nothing beside that..
but the wrong matter that i actually did it in the 1st day i've met.
how trifling he felt about me now!! about my love that actually there is no one can count how much i love you..but its seem i am doing that with no love,no passion just because im lustful...yeah im lost control..

i lost my control not ecause i've never touched by anyone after my ex-boyfriend.i lost because i think you're so special...someone that really i loved and really reasonable i could doing that with you..

i want retell the detail in here,but let im hideaway into my heart.about what both of us done..
it was sweet.thank you..
thank you for the memorable moment that i wouldnt forget.
it was the pretiest present and also make me shoked even i've planned that but i cant believe it will really turn in reality

you'll be the one i will love forever..
and it wouldt appears the another love for second,third and other love.

doushite adam kun???

i do nothing just waiting and waiting all the day...
dont you feel how i suffer waiting you...
since yesterday i leave you a message...
hope ypu will replied it soon..but you even send me any single message lately...

are you okay adam??? doushite????
tell me what going on??? if you wont me to disturb you with my silly message again that okay..but atleast tell me the truth..

dont be silent like this...i dont know what should i do..
i know you busy, i know you akh....
i cant tell that you probably disappointing with me..

gomenasai....hountou ni gomen....
sorry i really sorry if i act like childish...sorry if you dont like me anymore..
is it your true feeling about me???
i such looser ..no motivated without you..
no smiling just tears every single breath..

please say sayonara ....
dont leave me without any single words..
because i need ur true feeling,not guesting like a crazy every nite.

adam...
if you have someone special it alrite,its alrite even that person isnt me.
im glad if you're happy there.
it will not make my love for you disappear ...
certainly i will love you no matter what...
inspite of you will go so far, you'll turn bad or anything even you turn to hate me im okay...

just remember.. i am here always waiting you..
keep my love for you
so
give me change...
i wont make you disappoited..

ADAM

I LOVE YOU

the day we have met

today finally i could met him...
directly...
we both shaking our hands,starring deep in the eyes

but we just could make a lil conversation, and nothing just telling again our name and hidding our red face...*shy shy*

the night before today he surprizingly sending me a message...it was make me shock because he never sending me sms firstly..
but that day he make my eyes openned so big...*yeah because i seen he sent me a message*

we both talking naturally like usual...nothin special just i realize that he probably take a mind on me too...
just make me smiling on the long nite before finally i could go to sleep well

greatfully i want to say big thanks to my friends who advicing me to take time break...let him alone and not contact him to checked he is tought of me or not...

even it was hard to stooping me not cantac him...but proudly my hard work was so great to make him doing something that he never do before...

2.pm...i arrived at the circus...what a suprizing he could recognizing me at the short time...
i was the happiest girl that time..
nt stoped by that...he countinuously spying on me...
so cute...he even do not know that what he has done is perfectly stupid
of course i could see him clearly even he is hidding his persistance in the darkness

awfull day i think...
but its not end up already...
at the 10.30 pm he got online...
and we both getting crazy chat...hmmm i could says that it was dummiest chat i ever had with him

here it is what we have talked

hooo.....knapa
[Anda]
22:50
kaget
status palsu tuh
[Adam Albert]
22:51
kox kaget knapa
mana
[Anda]
22:51
yg hoooo
[Adam Albert]
22:51
och...............'
[Anda]
22:52
duh td sorry y temenku autis semua
jd rame sendiri disitu
[Adam Albert]
22:53
ya ga ppa kox............
[Anda]
22:53
pasti capek seharian manggung....
oiya td siapa yg sms aku
[Adam Albert]
22:54
hehehehehe ga jga uda biasa kox
ga tau twu.............
[Anda]
22:55
kok??? bkn km yg kasih kan??
[Adam Albert]
22:56
mng dia ga ngasi tau apa namanya cp
[Anda]
22:57
gak....yo dah aku cuekin....
[Adam Albert]
22:58
spanya cori ya orng dia minta kox klu ga d ksi a ga enak
[Anda]
22:58
cuma bilang aku temenya adam....nah looo
[Adam Albert]
22:59
ya tmen qu tapi aga jauh lah
[Anda]
22:59
ya udah kalo emang km yg kasih...
cm takut ada penjahat inbox yg suka periksa2 hape orang
[Adam Albert]
23:00
och ..........km gie apa.........
[Anda]
23:01
tiba2 kbangun tidur lupa matiin tv kosan
jd onle sekalian
online
[Adam Albert]
23:01
och..........tdi uda tidur brati
[Anda]
23:03
dari sore....soalnya dr sabtu kmaren aku pulang kampung trus td nonton bis itu lgs balik kekampus...cd lumayan cpek
[Adam Albert]
23:04
ocyauda istrahat lah..........
[Anda]
23:04
aneh emang aku sih sering kebangun tengah malem
km mau istirat ta?
[Adam Albert]
23:05
och mng knapa..........ga si km aj tkut mu itrah...
[Anda]
23:06
paling ntar bisa tidur lg kalo udah kebangun gini...
percuma dimeremin jg gak bakal tidur
[Adam Albert]
23:07
oyalah..............ma cpa d ctu mng
[Anda]
23:07
sendirian kok..
cuma ditemenin tv
[Adam Albert]
23:07
och..........krain matmen
[Anda]
23:08
aku sewa kamar sendiri...
gak sm temen
[Adam Albert]
23:08
och bisa ikutan dong hehehe
[Anda]
23:09
ikutan ditabok bu kos!!!! hehehe
[Adam Albert]
23:09
masa c..................
[Anda]
23:10
coba aja....resiko ditanggung pengunjung
[Adam Albert]
23:10
hehehe ga kox becanda
[Anda]
23:12
heee nanti tak bilang km adikku..ahahahaa
kebukos
[Adam Albert]
23:12
ya klu ade mang boleh..........
[Anda]
23:13
boleh....
adik aku yg SMA sering dateng
[Adam Albert]
23:13
masa c coba akh..........mang km mau masukin aq
och.
[Anda]
23:14
tapi apa bu kos ku sebego itu bisa percaya km adikku itu masalahnya...hahahaha
[Adam Albert]
23:15
mang knapa................kox bisa ga percya
[Anda]
23:17
gak mirip kali...tapi berdoa aja katarak bu kosku makin parah jd kamu isa msk...hihihi
[Adam Albert]
23:19
ya klu gtu jngan blang ade lah blang ponakan kek apa kek
[Anda]
23:19
wih ponakan....bener2 bisa tuh
[Adam Albert]
23:20
bisa kah........trus misalya klu bisa mu ngapin brdua d kamar hehehe
[Anda]
23:21
mau main monopoli ato main kartu???tersserah
[Adam Albert]
23:21
mainin km aj deh hehee
[Anda]
23:22
cieee...enak di km dong..
[Adam Albert]
23:22
kox enak di aq c mang km ga enek apa.......
[Anda]
23:23
brarti boleh mainin km jg../hehehe
adil tuh
[Adam Albert]
23:24
ya klu mau mah km maenin aq boleh2 aja kox ga adayg larang tu klu aq mah
[Anda]
23:25
hmmmm masa c?????
[Adam Albert]
23:25
ya lah ga usa ragu sma adam mah'
[Anda]
23:26
ya ya...kalo aku digaransi y aku gak bakal ragu
[Adam Albert]
23:27
kox garansi apanya mang
[Anda]
23:27
garansi kepercayaan...biar gak ragu
[Adam Albert]
23:29
hehehe........mang kosan km deket dari rambi
[Anda]
23:30
yah garansinya kok"hehehehe"...30 menit...aku kan dijembernya..
[Adam Albert]
23:30
garansinya knapa kox
[Anda]
23:31
garansimu kurang meyakinkan...
[Adam Albert]
23:32
maksudya garansi dari apanya dlu
[Anda]
23:32
td kita ngomongin apa hayo sampe aku minta garansi
ngomngin maenin km tapi ga tau aq maenin apanya km
[Anda]
23:34
nah tu dia yg bikin bingung...kmnya gak jelas mau main apa
[Adam Albert]
23:35
mang yng bisa di maenin apa km............
[Anda]
23:36
haaah..udah2 ngomongnya nglantur gini...
ntar aku mikir aku mikir yg nggak2
[Adam Albert]
23:37
mang hehehehe sori2 uda ngomng yg ngga2 nie
[Anda]
23:37
ok2...
rencana kita yg waktu itu jd????
[Adam Albert]
23:38
kemana jauh ga c tmpatya...........
[Anda]
23:39
1 jam kok...toh td mc km bilang kalo senin-jumat cm ada 1 kali pertunjukan
itupun jam 8...jd kan waktunya makin panjang
[Adam Albert]
23:40
ya c aq jga mau c.........tpkan aq bsanya jm1 bis latian
[Anda]
23:41
y gpp...dr jam segitu aja udah puas keknya
[Adam Albert]
23:42
och mng ada apa aj d sono...........
[Anda]
23:43
biasa aja sih...pemandangan gitu..kalo mau kekolam renangnya jg bisa..cz diatas ada hotelnya jg
[Adam Albert]
23:44
oya uda...........
[Anda]
23:45
bener mau???
[Adam Albert]
23:45
namaya ap
[Anda]
23:45
rembangan....
[Adam Albert]
23:46
kyanya aq pernah maen deh
[Anda]
23:46
hmmmm gitu y gak ngajak2...
[Adam Albert]
23:47
uda lama tp.kta aja lum knal klu ga salah c tmpatya
[Anda]
23:48
y kalo udah jangan...ngapain...kan udah tahu
[Adam Albert]
23:48
trus...........
[Anda]
23:49
y gak jd aja...udah tahu ini...
oiya...td temenku ngambek...gak bisa foto sm gajah
padahal obsesi bgt dia
[Adam Albert]
23:51
loh kox bisa ngambek
[Anda]
23:53
aku yg salah sih...keburu keluar...gak taunya kandang gajahnya didalem pager...jd pas mau masuk lg gak dibolehin petugasnya
[Adam Albert]
23:53
och...........knapa ga ngomng aja
[Anda]
23:54
takut g dipercaya ntar dikira cm mau jd penyusup...alias penonton gratisan
makanya td aku sms km
coba km bisa keluar kita kan brani
[Adam Albert]
23:55
ya jga c aq tadi ga kluar c aq tadi di dalem trus
[Anda]
23:56
didalem ngintipin trus....hehehehe
[Adam Albert]
23:57
enak aj...
[Anda]
23:57
keliatan loooo
adam jaim sih...
[Adam Albert]
23:57
]ga akh tu mah tmen qu.........
[Anda]
23:58
iya ta?????? hehehehe
[Adam Albert]
23:58
yaaaaaaaaaaa
[Anda]
23:58
ngapain jg dia ngintip..toh kenal aja nggak...
[Adam Albert]
23:59
ya ga tau mungkin mu kenal x
[Anda]
23:59
oh.....gak ngaku nih....
[Adam Albert]
00:00
mang ngga
Hari Ini
[Anda]
00:00
ya ya...pecaya2
[Adam Albert]
00:00
hehehe gtu dng
[Anda]
00:01
huuuh....tp ada satu lg...knapa td tuh batut bisa nyamperin aku??? kok kayaknya ada yg ngerekomendasiin aku ya buat maju.....
badut
[Adam Albert]
00:02
ga tau tuh badut nya aja tau klu di stu ada cew
[Anda]
00:03
hmmmm badutnya aja td binggung trs masih liat kebelakang nanya yg sini apa yg ini....ckckckck
[Adam Albert]
00:04
hahaha ga tau aq
aq ta of dlu ya ngantuk banget nie..............dah
[Anda]
00:05
yaya...angep aja aku tadi hampir apes
ok bye..
mimpiin aku y
heheheh



but now im worried..i am affraid couldnt met him anymore beside i cancelled our decission to go to rembangan..
how's stupid me..