★But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.（2 Chronicles 12：9）
I feel happy when I see people living their lives in their own way. I wish I could live my life like that too. When I hear the stories of such people, I am often surprised to learn that they have actually overcome great hardships. When I think, ``Maybe a vibrant life is a privilege only given to those who have overcome great hardships,'' I feel a little sad when I realize that it is not possible for me.
However, the Bible teaches us that having the strength to overcome is not an absolute prerequisite for living a vibrant life. On the contrary, it talks about the ``strength of being powerless.''
First of all, what does it mean to ``live your own life''? It is quite difficult to answer the question, "What does it mean to be yourself?" Until you know things such as "Who am I?" and "What kind of life do I want to lead?", you won't be able to clearly define what it means to live your own life. Is it not?
The first step to ``living in your own way'' is ``knowing yourself.'' And I think this becomes most obvious when we are faced with great difficulties.
When faced with difficulties and setbacks, people realize their own helplessness. If it was a small difficulty, you might be able to overcome it with effort. However, when that doesn't work, the larger-than-life version of myself, the helpless version of myself, becomes clear. Can we accept that image as ``this is who we are''? Or maybe you can't?
Those who cannot accept it may feel disappointed and despair. Or, you may continue to make unreasonable efforts to become the perfect version of yourself (but if this is an ``effort'' that hides arrogance and contradiction, like trying to become a god, it will only lead to a dead end). It will become part of your life). Others may try to overcome difficulties by turning a blind eye to their own inadequacies, boasting about their own righteousness and strength, and attacking or dominating others.
When you realize your own powerlessness, it's very difficult to admit that ``that's part of who you are.''
However, God says to me, ``Even so, it's okay.'' Why is it okay to be powerless? That's because God's power works in my powerless parts. God will not punish me for my weaknesses and shortcomings. God says, ``I don't blame you for your shortcomings or weaknesses.In fact, I will do something about what you lack.'' God's power is displayed in situations where human weakness is exposed. God's power resides in weakness. The idea is that while human weaknesses remain weaknesses, by adding God's power to them, the overall strength increases.
In the stories of people who have overcome great hardships, the phrase "Thanks to so-and-so" often appears. This is a confession that I was able to overcome this problem not only because of my own efforts, but also because I was helped by many other forces (accidental encounters with collaborators, mysterious connections and flows). Christians feel the presence of God behind such other forces. However, even if you do not believe in God, I believe that those who are aware of the existence of other forces and are grateful for their help are walking the same path as devout believers.
There is a high possibility that flaws and weaknesses that cannot be changed are gifts from God. I can think of three reasons for this.
The first reason is that, as I mentioned earlier, when we realize that we are powerless, we can appreciate the existence of other forces that are trying to support us. Because you can. Pursuing a life that is uniquely yours may not be possible without the support of others.
The second reason is that the energy you put into futile efforts to change your ``unchangeable flaws and weaknesses'' becomes unnecessary by accepting them. When you no longer waste energy, unexplained stress and chronic fatigue decrease, and you often feel refreshed in mind and body. The energy saved can then be used to ``explore a way to live a life that is true to oneself while accepting one's shortcomings and weaknesses.'' When you stop focusing your life on correcting your shortcomings, you become more aware of ``the one small thing in front of you that you can do right now.'' ``Knowing that you can't do what you can't do, and knowing that you can do what you can'' is a great hint for finding ``a way of life that suits you.'' Buddhism teaches that ``giving up (Akirameru) leads to becoming clear (Akirakaninaru).''
*"What I can do is a small thing. But if I can do it with gratitude, it will surely be a big thing." (Tomihiro Hoshino)
The third reason is that people meet through their "weaknesses," and they share their "weaknesses" with each other. Because it connects to the entrance. Many people are talking about it.
○ “Hurry up, sadness, turn into wings. Hurry up, scars, become a compass” (song “On the Back of the Silver Dragon” by Miyuki Nakajima)
○ “I have a scar. But from that scar, ``The gentleness of others sinks in.'' (Tomihiro Hoshino)
We do not live alone. I'm not just hoping to live my life alone on a deserted island. I believe that it is through relationships with many people that the meaning of ``living as oneself'' becomes clearer.
I believe that the fact that I was born into this world and that I am now allowed to live by God means that my existence has some great meaning. What would God want me to do? How is he telling us to live? When this mystery is solved, I believe that the ``way to live my own life'' will become clear to me. And I believe that one of the clues to solving the mystery is the ``unchangeable flaws and weaknesses'' that have been given to me as blessings.
Lately, I've been thinking every day that by accepting God's help and accepting my helpless self, I can find a way to ``live a vibrant life in my own way.''