Part 3

More about realistic goal setting.

'You can not make a crab walk straight.' Aristophones

The importance of setting realistic goals can be a great influence on the achievability of change. If the desired outcome is possible it change to the new desired state can not occur.

An American performance coach, Bob Davies, talks about the need to set realistic goals AND consequences if the goals are not achieved. He uses the gym as an example. In trying to get fit a person signs up to the gym. They make a commitment to attend four or five times a week. The problem for most people is it is too huge a step. From nothing to five times a week is a big change. Better to start with two times a week and gradually build up.

The consequences have to be significant.

If you want to loose weight and you decide to diet, no chocolate or 'bad' food and you set a realistic target. If you don't reach that target what are the consequences?

What if you didn't reach your realistic target and there were real consequences. Before you start your diet if you don't loose 1kg a week over four weeks you have to pay half of your wage to .........? Here you insert a group or club or political organisation you hate.

Bob Davies uses the example of a left leaning student behind in his university work. He agrees to post date cheques to the Nazi party. If any assignments are late the Nazi party gets the money. Guess what? All his work was in on time.

Set realistic goals.

Set consequences to spur you on.

Change part 2

'It is not the strongest of the species who survive, not the most intelligent, but those who are most adaptive to change.' Charles Darwin

3. Consider the outcomes of any change. This can be positive or negative. People who are successful tend to be risk takers. This doesn't mean reckless fools who have no self-control ( those people may experience success but tend to crash and burn). The risk takers who are successful in the long term tend to consider any change rather like a game of chess. In chess before playing a piece you need to think about all the other actions this may create.

A change in life may not always lead to the desired outcome. Wealth has made some people no happier than when they worked in a department store. The key to change is to try, be willing to give it a shot because the consequences of not changing can be more dire. W.G.P. (aka Walnut Grove Press) stated, 'He that expects nothing is never disappointed.'

Later I will describe how the process of change can be just as enlightening as achieving a goal.

A few years ago Tiger Woods re-learnt his golf swing. He was not happy with winning everything and wanted to improve his game. If his new swing didn't do it who's to say he would be able to re-capture his old good style. He decided the risk was worth and became even more successful.

Remember, positive is good but being blindly optimistic could create vulnerability.

Next we'll look at the traits associated with achieving change. For now let's finish with another quote. This time from Albert Einstein, ' Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.'

First Steps of Change

Want to be happy in life?

Want to soar and attain your dreams?

Not happy with your current situation?

Time for a change.

Over the next few blog entries I'll describe a topic that has fascinated me for a long time. Why do some people achieve succesful changes in their life.?What methods of change are associated with favourable outcomes? Why is it difficult and how can it be made easier?

Because this is blog world I will try and drop the scholarly approach. The trick to blog writing, apparently, is short, sharp easy to read points rather than long winded essays as per university.

Let's start with a definition of change. Most dictionaries use statements like 'to make or become different.' For personal change we are interested in becoming different. If we are conscripts in the army or prisoners somebody might want to make us different.

Simple changes in life could be a desire to cease smoking. Poor people would like to be rich. A salary man wants to be boss. The rich always want top be richer.

The first step.
Identify what you want to change. Be as specific as possible. A term like 'I want to be rich' is a starting point but a better term might be 'I want to be a (US$) millionaire'

Why is this better, because it provides a target. A goal.

The second step
Is your goal realistic? Can it be achieved? Not is it easy or is it hard. You need to be able to answer the question with a yes or no.

Using the millionaire example. Is it possible for somebody (especially in the developed world) to become a millionaire? Of course it is, yes. People do it all the time. Sometimes through luck, fame, inventiveness, hard work, crime etc.

Ever heard multi-millionaires say 'the first million was the hardest.' In the same way when as a kid you learnt to ride a bike. You would fall, lose balance and fail time after time. Eventually you would wobble and keep going. soon you would cycle along and wonder what was so difficult about it.

I met a guy who had become quite rich. He certainly had cards stacked against him. Severly disabled with a speech impediment. Living in a state run facility. He started his own taxi company. I'm not sure if he achieved millionaire status but the company enabled him to achieve a feeling of self-worth. He was doing something for himself and not having to rely on carers.

For him it was an achievable goal. I'm sure many would have said it was almost impossible for a disabled man to achieve this but his self-belief empowered him.

That'll do for now.
Rob