Emo

I do not know what to blog about but I just feel like opening up an entry.

Another listless day, I just cannot seem to find my energy in doing things. I am having all sorts of mixed feelings inside me. I just do not want to do anything. There isn't a thing that seemed to go right. Right from the start where I buy my ink cartridge, which failed because I do not know which model ink to buy, until the lack of food at home, making feel really pissed with everything here.

All I can think about is to go overseas.

To fly as far as possible.

To go to United States.

At least I have friends there, whom I might be able to visit if I am bored despite the distance. Grrr. I am bored, bored, bored.

Why am I spending so much!? Especially on food. I cannot seem to stop myself from eating. This is terrible. I can only spend $3 a day! I forgot to add the fact that I have to spend on other things. ARGH. Damn it. I wish I can claim everything but $450 seems really alot already. I wish for some financial blessing!

Thank you, God!

And yep, Praise The Lord!

Linkin Park will be coming to my little island on 13th November 2007! HOORAY many many times! But there lies a little problem, who should I go with? Of course, I would very much prefer to go with the hardcore fans but I do not know who! I want back my good standing positions and a kiss from Chester Bennington!

I was extremely excited initially until eeew, the stalker gives me real lots of creeps. I do not know what to reply him at all. The feeling that he gives me right now is indescribably scary. I feel like just cutting any relations with him but he does not get the meaning even though I do not reply most of his text and instant messages. Why are some guys just so dumb? I really cannot think of anything to say to him anymore because ANY single thing he does totally turns me off. It is THAT disgusting. Sigh. God help me! Send some wisdom to him for me!

Touching on the subject of love, I think I am beginning to understand myself more. I am someone who loves challenges. No matter how much I seek for attention or love, I do not want it to be from just anybody, but it is that somebody which I have set my eyes upon. As long as that special someone has get back to me, I will feel the sense of satisfaction. Which explains why I dislike this stalker at all because I did not even use any "force" to make him focus on me. Bummer. He is a nice person overall, but when it gets till overdoing it, I repel more. I guess love works this way for most humans. Something which is hard to obtain, all the more you will try to get it. Sigh. The world is crazy. I am crazy.

When is my miracle coming? Hmmm.
I wonder if I will really marry out of the country some day...

You Can't Control These Feelings

There are millions of questions whirling around my head right now, with not even one single answer for any one of them. The wait is really unbearable, where have you gone to? Do you still remember the one who isn't residing very far from where you are right now? Is the connection over there really that bad that you kept getting disconnected all the time? Now that makes me wonder if all my friendly greetings did reached you. Stop being so far away from me, hear my cries, open your ears, feel my heart!