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𝚀𝚞𝚘𝚝𝚎𝚜
♔∴∵∴♔∴∵∴♔∴∵∴♔∴∵∴♔∴∵∴♔∴∵∴♔
Part 4
“If you don't fall in that category [those with an active eating disorder], you might not truly understand how numbers work on the disordered brain. They read like challenges, or some kind of heavenly ordained permission to drop down to a lower weight than whatever plateau you may be hovering on.”
― Shell: One Woman’s Final Year After a Lifelong Struggle with Anorexia and Bulimia
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“I was hungry to be thin, rail-thin, skeletal. Bones clicking on bones, sinew on sinew.”
― Shell: One Woman’s Final Year After a Lifelong Struggle with Anorexia and Bulimia
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“I've come to realize that hunger feels more like home than any tangible structure ever has, or probably ever will. I know now that creating absence is my way of coping with absence.”
―
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“Sometimes it's as if I can shrink away to nothing. Sometimes I feel as pure and perfect as a ghost. The hunger, the headaches, the dizziness—these are the only things that are real.”
― The Girl Before
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"her illness was a kind of self-hypnosis which obliterated the outside world, a way of escaping life and reducing its proportions to what she could manage.”
― To Die For
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“I am my own cannibal.”
― Sour
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"how dare she not forfeit her fetish for a fading frame, to be my performance piece”
― Sour
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“I had always liked my anorexic reflection. It meant seeing the parts instead of the whole. Each connection, each articulation of muscle, skin, and bone made explicit. Gert said that we all had distorted images of ourselves. Either fatter or skinnier than we really were. She said we hated our bodies, hated ourselves. I had never thought so.”
―
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My double image, the evil skinny chick who hisses, Don't eat. I'm not going to let you eat. I'll let you go as soon as you're thin, I swear I will. Everything will be okay when you're thin.”
― Wasted: A Memoir of Anorexia and Bulimia
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“Anorexia is, without doubt, a serious eating disorder, but there is a hell of a lot of mainstream disordered eating going on out there.”
― The Ministry of Thin
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“Basically, when it comes to women, both aging and eating are somehow shameful.”
― An Apple a Day: A Memoir of Love and Recovery from Anorexia
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“Anorexics are the best liars in the world. You do anything to keep control. You place people into separate categories, those you trust, those you don’t, those you can confide in and those whom you lie to. But of course the reality is that underneath it all, you are lying to yourself all the time.”
― The Invisible Girl
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“From the newsstands a dozen models smiled up at her from a dozen magazine covers, smiled in thin-faced, high-cheekboned agreement to Kessa's new discovery. They knew the secret too. They knew thin was good, thin was strong; thin was safe.”
― The Best Little Girl in the World
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•⚖☽ 拒食症 ☾⚖•