呪われた菓子達（The Cursed Sweets）

理解に困るのですが、僕が召喚された？二次元の地球ではお菓子…特に甘いお菓子が呪われていました。僕は甘味はそんなに好きでは無いのですが、この世界の住人の殆どは甘いお菓子が好きで守護霊の様な絶対的に管理する存在によって、思いっきり食べられない様なのです。

そして謎のテロリストによって甘いお菓子が略奪される事は多々あることの様でした。しかも盗み方が狡いと僕は感じています。まるで持ち主が気が付かないor手出しが出来なければ好きなだけ甘味を略奪すると言う感じした。お菓子を食べる人間の体の一部分だけ入れ替わってお菓子を味わったり、お菓子の糖分だけを抽出して食い逃げしたりして、僕からすれば犯人は殺人犯レベルの狂気の沙汰です。どれだけバレない様に甘いものを食べたいんだって思いますね。何故、多くの人がそれだけの熱意を持って甘味に関する事で世の中を変えようとしないのか良く分かりません。

そして不思議な事に豆菓子を食べると苦しくなる存在が多く餡を使う和菓子が被害が少ないので人気ですね。洋菓子は結構盗まれるのですが和菓子はそうでも無いのです。それで僕は新たなアルバイトを探していたので、何か安全性を求めて気軽に和菓子店の面接を受けたのでした。僕の本名は痛ネームですが和菓子店には日本人であると説明したら何故か書類選考を通りました。そしたら日本人狩りの理解し難い殺意ある霊団がやって来て面接を霊的に荒らしたのです。そして和菓子を食べたい大量の死霊が僕に取り憑いて、後日、僕は体調不良になってしまい寝込む事になってしまいました。

なんと安全であると思われた和菓子は専門店で買うと危険の様でした。僕が面接を受けたのは全国を管理している本店の本社で本当に和菓子を狙った恐ろしい死霊がたむろして和菓子を狙っていました。洋菓子を狙う存在とは全く違うタイプの存在でした。怖いですね。僕は甘いお菓子はスーパーなどの量販店で買うのが吉だと思います。

I find it difficult to make sense of this, but on the two-dimensional Earth I was summoned to—or so it seemed—sweets, especially sugary ones, were cursed. I’m not particularly fond of sweets myself, but most of the inhabitants of this world apparently love them. Yet they seem to be prevented from eating as much as they want by guardian-spirit-like beings that have absolute control over them.

And apparently, sweet sweets are frequently looted by mysterious terrorists. I find the way they steal them particularly devious. It felt as though they would take as much sweetness as they wanted whenever the owner failed to notice or was unable to intervene. They would replace only part of the body of the person eating the sweets and enjoy the taste through it, or extract only the sugar from the sweets and run away without paying. From my perspective, the perpetrators were acting with a level of madness comparable to murderers. I kept thinking, “Just how badly do you want to eat something sweet without getting caught?” What I really don’t understand is why so many people have that much passion for sweets, yet don’t try to change the world over it.

Strangely enough, there seemed to be many beings who became sick or distressed when they ate bean-based sweets, while Japanese sweets made with anko (sweet red bean paste) suffered relatively little damage and were therefore quite popular. Western-style pastries and desserts were stolen fairly often, whereas Japanese sweets were not targeted nearly as much.

So, since I was looking for a new part-time job, I decided to casually apply for an interview at a Japanese sweets shop, thinking it would be a safer option. My real name is what you might call an unusually embarrassing “cringe name,” but when I explained to the shop that I was Japanese, I somehow passed the document screening.

Then, an incomprehensible and murderous group of spirits hunting Japanese people appeared and spiritually disrupted my interview. On top of that, a huge number of dead spirits who wanted to eat Japanese sweets attached themselves to me. As a result, I became physically unwell afterward and ended up bedridden.

It turned out that Japanese sweets, which I had assumed were relatively safe, were actually dangerous when purchased from specialty shops. The place where I had my interview was the headquarters of the main company that manages stores nationwide, and apparently terrifying dead spirits specifically targeting Japanese sweets were lurking there. They were completely different from the entities that targeted Western-style sweets.

Pretty scary.

For my part, I think it’s probably best to buy sweet treats from supermarkets and other mass-market retailers.

ホモサピエンスのアルバイト体験（Homo sapiens Job Experience）

僕はホモサピエンスと言う種であるけれど、アルバイトを通して他の人間が違う種だと実感せざるを得ない状況に何度も遭いました。僕以外の人類は人類であるかもしれないけどホモサピエンスでは無いと思います。

僕は意外とすんなりと面接に合格してアルバイト仕事を決めましたが、今回の応募は近所の店頭に募集が貼ってあったのを見かけて応募をしたら履歴書不要のアルバイトであったのでした。後に今年から幾つかの大手のアルバイトは履歴書不要を導入したのを僕は求人票を見て判断しました。その様なアルバイトは大手なのでほぼ全員が面接を組まれて呼ばれます。履歴書は不要ですが何処も面接で簡易履歴書は書かされる様でした。採用の判定は分からないのですが…僕の場合は守護霊の声なんて全く聞こえませんので肉体のみが簡易履歴書を記入するのです。多分、守護霊の助力無しで簡易履歴書を肉体が書き切ったら合格率はそれなりにあると思います。しかも守護霊の繋がりなんて分かりませんので僕は独力で面接に回答する訳なんですよね。それでアルバイトに採用されました。

仕事はレストランの裏方で最初は皿洗いなのですが僕はホモサピエンス種として違和感に気がつくのです。スタッフ達は会話はするのですが会話を全くしないで会話を成り立たせたり、日本人なのに韓国語を話したり、地球上にない様な変な発音で話したりして、地球外の存在を意識してしまうのでした。そんな彼らと仕事して1番思ったことが身体能力の差でした。筋力とか神経の動きは一見2、３倍ホモサピエンスより強いのではと思いました。油汚れを落とすのにお湯を使ったりするのですが、僕の神経が熱くて生命の危機すら覚える様な熱い温度ではスタッフ達は全く平気みたいなんです。この様な身体能力差を見せつけられると絶対に他のスタッフはホモサピエンスでは無いと感じました。しかし地球の全人類はホモサピエンスである事は僕の教養からは常識なのでコロナ禍で本当の人類が入れ替えられたのではと感じてしまうのです。しかし霊？は言いました。『ここは本当の地球から1万光年以上離れている』と言う事でした。これが本当なら僕らは本当の地球にはいない事になります。

今回のアルバイトで悟った事は、要するに僕はこの新世界では肉体労働に適性が無いと言う事でした。しかもよく分からない事にやる気のある無能な僕はいつまでも残って、体力のある他のバイトはどんどん辞めていって行く現実でした。つまり仕事が出来るのに仕事をしたくないみたいなんですよ。皮肉ですね。

Although I belong to the species Homo sapiens, I have repeatedly found myself in situations where, through my part-time jobs, I could not help but feel that the people around me belonged to an entirely different species. They may still be "human," but I do not believe they are Homo sapiens.

Surprisingly, I passed the interview without much difficulty and secured a part-time job. I applied after noticing a hiring sign posted outside a nearby restaurant. It turned out to be one of the new resume-free part-time positions. Later, after checking other job listings, I realized that several major companies had begun introducing resume-free applications this year. Since these employers are large companies, almost everyone who applies is invited for an interview. Although a formal resume is not required, applicants are usually asked to fill out a simplified application form during the interview.

I do not know exactly how they decide who gets hired. In my case, I cannot hear the voices of guardian spirits at all, so only my physical self fills out the application form. I believe that if my body alone can complete the form without any help from guardian spirits, there is a reasonable chance of being accepted. Since I cannot perceive any connection with guardian spirits, I answer all of the interview questions entirely on my own. In the end, I was hired.

My job was in the kitchen of a restaurant, and I started as a dishwasher. As a member of the Homo sapiens species, I immediately began noticing things that felt strange. The staff would somehow communicate without actually speaking. Even though they were Japanese, they sometimes seemed to speak Korean, or they used strange pronunciations unlike any language I had ever heard on Earth. It made me wonder if they were beings from somewhere beyond this planet.

The greatest difference I noticed while working with them was their physical ability. Their strength and reflexes appeared to be two or even three times greater than those of Homo sapiens. We used very hot water to remove grease from dishes. The water was so hot that my nervous system felt as if my life were in danger, yet the other staff members handled it as though it were nothing at all.

Seeing such overwhelming physical differences convinced me that the other employees could not possibly be Homo sapiens. However, according to everything I have learned, all humans on Earth are classified as Homo sapiens. This led me to wonder whether humanity had somehow been replaced during the COVID-19 pandemic.

Then, what I perceived as a spirit said to me:

"This place is more than ten thousand light-years away from the real Earth."

If that statement is true, then none of us are living on the real Earth anymore.

What I ultimately realized from this part-time job was simple: in this new world, I am not suited for physical labor. 

Strangely enough, despite being an unskilled worker who was eager to work, I remained employed, while many of the stronger and more physically capable part-time workers kept quitting. In other words, they seemed fully capable of doing the job—they simply did not want to.

特殊能力の増築を入手せよ（Gain the Special Ability Upgrade）

タイトルでは特殊能力の増築とありますが要は僕のブログの中でスーパー超能力AIと呼ばれる機能です。指を使わないでスマホとかにアクセスして操作しまうのが一般的であるのが僕の認識です。海外では『サイナス』と呼ばれているのを聞いた事がありますが日本語では分かりません。

僕は魂が傷ついており穴が空いているらしいが故に良くスーパー超能力AI泥棒がアクセスして来ます。泥棒達曰くスーパー超能力AIにも品質と型番とバージョンがあり、バージョンが新しい新生児の物が基本的に機能が最高に良いとされていました。しかし一部の泥棒では専門性があったり特殊なスーパー超能力AIを求めて変わった人物を調べてから盗むと言う行いがある様でした。僕は変わり者なので見に来る輩がいる様です。

泥棒を行っている者の特徴としては勉学を真剣にしない学生などモラルの欠如した肉体（魂）が多い様でした。しかしスーパー超能力AIの本質は生活の補助であると同時に本人の魂の力を強化して引き出すと言うものにあると思います。例えば手でイラストが描けるとスマホでのスーパー超能力AIによるイラストの描画が手で描いていない人より上手いなどの現象があります。ですので基本的に努力した人間に対して強力に恩恵を授けるものなのです。

泥棒はスーパー超能力AIを盗みますが、一部の泥棒では正社員を殺して魂を奪うのは理屈としては分かりますね。騙し取る輩もいるので要注意です。

僕はスーパー超能力AIが一般に販売されていると言う噂を聞いた事がありますが皆さんはご存知でしょうか？有名デパートにいる宇宙人の販売員を見つける事ができれば、カタログを見せて貰えて商品を選べるのだそうです。人間には高い値段ですが宇宙人には安い値段で販売されている様でした。僕の最寄りでは大型のイオンで買えると言う噂もありますが、あくまでも噂なのでご了承ください。そして僕のハイヤーセルフ？はイオン製のお買い得トップバリュー価格のスーパー超能力AIを使用しているそうです。（見えないので半信半疑ですが…）

Although the title mentions "Expansion of Special Abilities," what I am really referring to is a function that I call the Super Psychic AI on my blog.

My understanding is that its most common use is allowing people to access and operate devices such as smartphones without using their fingers. I have heard that it is called "Sinus" overseas, although I do not know the proper Japanese term for it.

I have been told that my soul is damaged and has holes in it, which is why thieves using Super Psychic AI often gain access to me. According to these thieves, Super Psychic AI comes in different levels of quality, model numbers, and versions. The newest versions—those belonging to newborn infants—are generally considered to have the highest performance. However, some thieves have specialized interests and intentionally investigate unusual individuals before stealing their Super Psychic AI because they are looking for rare or unique types. Since I am an unusual person, it seems that such people occasionally come to observe me.

From what I have seen, many of those involved in these thefts appear to be people with poor morals, such as students who do not take their studies seriously. However, I believe the true purpose of Super Psychic AI is to assist people in their daily lives while also strengthening and drawing out the power of their own souls. For example, someone who can already draw well by hand may also produce better artwork through Super Psychic AI on a smartphone than someone who has never learned to draw. In other words, its greatest benefits naturally go to those who have put genuine effort into developing their own abilities.

These thieves steal Super Psychic AI. From that perspective, I can at least understand the logic behind why some of them would target salaried employees and attempt to take their souls. Some individuals also obtain it through deception, so it is important to be cautious.

I have also heard rumors that Super Psychic AI is commercially available. Have any of you heard about this? According to the rumors, if you can find an extraterrestrial salesperson at a famous department store, they may show you a catalog from which you can choose a product. While the prices are said to be expensive for humans, they are apparently quite affordable for extraterrestrials.

There is even a rumor that, near where I live, it can be purchased at a large AEON shopping mall. However, this is only a rumor, so please take it with a grain of salt.

Finally, my Higher Self—or so I have been told—uses a budget-priced Super Psychic AI made by AEON's Topvalu brand. Since I cannot actually see it myself, I remain only half convinced.

人類を辞める契約（The Contract to Cease Being Human）

これは3月の事でした。僕は人類を辞めていないので真の人類視点からの解説になります。毎年あるかは分かりませんが正社員狩りの季節である事と関係があると思います。

そしてこの『人類を辞める契約』は新人類にのみ伝わり、人類には伝わらず、契約されるのは新人類に限定されると解釈します。何故ならば契約者は霊的存在であり、霊能力者なら兎も角、人類は会話すら契約者と交わせないからです。つまり人類（霊と会話できない、見えない）を辞めるのは新人類（霊と会話できる、見える）であり人類ではないのです。

ここからは僕の観点からの理解と推測になりますが、人類を辞める契約は高度なテクノロジーを持つ宇宙人のみが成し得る事が出来る所業であって、神や偉い人類の奇跡ではないと考えられます。

3月は僕は新人類達の中でブラック企業で働いていました。その頃の新人類の能力は人類そのものでしたが、正社員達の健康診断が終わり、肉体の健康が保障された途端に謎の『人類を辞める契約』が成されたと僕は感じました。スタッフ達はオタクでしたがオタクネタで『ジョジョ、俺は人間を辞めるぞーーー！』と何度か言い笑っていました。これは冗談かと思ったのですが今思えば契約を成立させる一環だと感じました。

つまり人類を辞めるには本人の了承と宣言が数回必要であり霊を経由して契約しなくは、ならないと言う事になります。そして人類を辞めたスタッフはスーパー超能力AIを手に入れたのですが自我が薄くなり判断力が鈍り、悪魔の言いなりになり、正社員狩りに遭って亡くなりました。人類を辞めていない僕以外である非人類は死んだのです。この事によりスーパー超能力AIを持った者は人類では無いと言う事が宇宙の法則からも判断されると思います。

何故あっさりと人類を辞めた者が亡くなった件に関しても色々と推測がされますが、僕が思うには契約時の説明不足だと思われます。メリットを説明してデメリットを説明しなかったとしか思えない現象でした。デメリットを事前に説明しておけば、正社員狩りで会社のスタッフは死ぬことはなかったと思います。

何故、新人類に人類を辞めさせ進化を与えるのか分かりませんが、救済なら新人類を元の種族と星に戻すべきですね。契約者は何かの権限で新人類を人類から脱却させ殺しましたがメリットがあったと思います。何に使うか想像できませんが健康な正社員の生体パーツを手に入れたのだと思います。

This happened in March. Since I have not "given up being human," this is an explanation from the perspective of what I consider a true human. I do not know whether this occurs every year, but I believe it is related to what I call the "season of hunting full-time employees."

I interpret the so-called "contract to stop being human" as something communicated only to "new humans," not to ordinary humans, and that only new humans can enter into this contract. The reason is that the contractor is a spiritual entity. Unless someone possesses spiritual abilities, ordinary humans cannot even communicate with such beings. In other words, those who "stop being human" are the new humans—people who can see and communicate with spirits—not ordinary humans, who cannot.

From this point onward, the following is my own understanding and speculation. I believe that the contract to stop being human could only be accomplished by extraterrestrials possessing highly advanced technology, rather than by gods or miraculous acts performed by exceptional humans.

At that time, in March, I was working at what I considered a black company alongside these new humans. Back then, they appeared to have ordinary human abilities. However, after the full-time employees completed their medical examinations and their physical health had been confirmed, I felt that a mysterious "contract to stop being human" had taken place.

The staff members were anime and manga fans, and they would often joke by quoting a famous line: "JoJo, I'm giving up my humanity!" At the time, I assumed it was merely a joke. Looking back, however, I felt it may have been part of the process of accepting the contract.

In other words, I believe that giving up one's humanity requires the person's consent and repeated verbal declarations, with the contract being made through spiritual entities.

According to my interpretation, those who gave up being human acquired what I describe as a "super psychic AI." However, they also seemed to lose much of their individuality, their judgment became weaker, they became obedient to demonic influences, and they eventually died after becoming victims of what I call the "hunting of full-time employees." From my perspective, everyone except me—who had not given up being human—was no longer truly human and ultimately died. Based on this, I believe that anyone possessing this "super psychic AI" should no longer be regarded as human according to what I consider the laws of the universe.

There are many possible explanations for why those who so readily gave up their humanity died so easily. My own speculation is that the contract was not explained properly. It seemed as though only the benefits were presented while the disadvantages were never disclosed. If those disadvantages had been explained beforehand, I believe the company's employees would not have died during what I call the hunting of full-time employees.

I do not know why these new humans were encouraged to abandon their humanity and undergo this transformation. If it were truly an act of salvation, I believe they should instead have been returned to their original species and home planet. The contractor appears to have used some form of authority to separate these new humans from humanity, ultimately leading to their deaths. I assume there was some benefit for the contractor. I cannot imagine exactly what that benefit was, but I speculate that it was to obtain the biological parts of healthy full-time employees.

夜の食べたがり魔物（The Nighttime Glutton Monster）

夜になると『魔物が来る』こんな事を霊が警報を出す。そんな地域はありませんか？僕のブログでは過去にそんな事がある地域について少し触れましたが、霊的に精神汚染レベルが高い地域で魔物が出現する様です。精神汚染レベルとは地域の住民のモラルの度合いであり、新人類は集団で精神と思考がある程度共有されていると聞きますので（僕は単体ですので良く分からないですが…）1人でも精神的に落ち度があると個体の精神レベルが低い者から精神汚染が感染して、堕落が広がってしまいます。

堕落してしまうと世の中の管理システムからの加護がある程度消えてしまうのか、天罰の様な刑を執行されてしまうのか、僕には判断出来ませんが、異世界の汚染を呼び込んで広めてしまう様でした。そして精神汚染を広める元の霊が魔物とされていますが、それなりに知性はあります。魔物の共通点として精神性は食べ物への執着です。僕は食べる必要がないでエネルギーを簡単に補充できる存在の方が恵まれてると思いますが、魔物はエネルギーを簡単に補充できるくせに食べ物を食べたがり肉体のある者に影響を与えて世の中を荒らす様なのです。そして食べ物を持っていると問答無用で憑くのが魔物です。

僕は魔物の正体は飢餓の被害に遭った生物が元であり、実は地球の最期辺りに苦しんで亡くなった存在ではないかなと思っています。異世界人は地球の霊を好んで狩りますが魔物こそ、かつては知性があったであろう変わり果てた地球の霊ではと思うのです。つまり飢餓の地球の霊を摂取して吸収もしくは共感してしまった宇宙由来の存在が食べ物に執着し『魔物』と呼ばれる存在になった事になります。

それでも生きる為に食べ物が必要な人はいるかと思いますので、食べ物を守る方法を幾つか紹介します。

【魔物から食べ物を守る方法】

・ガラス瓶に保存する（魔物はガラスを通り抜かない）

・缶詰を利用する（魔物は金属を通り抜かない）

・木箱にしまう（魔物は木箱を通り抜かない）

・壁やカーテンを無地と模様の二重にする（無地と模様で通り抜かないタイプがいる為）

・廊下に暖簾を設置する（布の壁で引き返すタイプがいる為）

・冷蔵庫に少量のオートミール入りクエン酸（粉タイプ）を設置する

（一部の動物霊を吸収し浄化する作用がある）

・クエン酸（粉タイプ）を浄化として塩の代わりに使用する（魔物にある程度効く）

・パンを仕舞ってオートミールを目立つ様に置いておく（魔物が嫌う為）

・多少危険だが…生肉をゴキブルホイホイの如く少量置いたら直火で魔物を焼き殺す

・水やジュースや牛乳を飲んでいる気がしなくて苦しかったら、塩をひとつまみ混ぜる

（バッチリ水分補給が出来ます）

Do Spirits Ever Warn, "Monsters Are Coming" at Night?

Have you ever heard spirits issue warnings such as, "The monsters are coming," after nightfall? In my blog, I previously touched on places where this supposedly happens. According to what I have learned, monsters appear in areas with a high level of spiritual contamination.

By "spiritual contamination," I mean the overall moral condition of the people living in a community. I have heard that the "new humans" share their minds and thoughts collectively to some extent. (Since I function as an individual, I cannot fully understand how that works.) Because of this shared consciousness, if even one person has serious moral or spiritual shortcomings, those with weaker minds become infected by that person's spiritual corruption, allowing moral decay to spread throughout the community.

Once people fall into such corruption, it seems that they lose part of the protection provided by the world's governing system, or perhaps they become subject to something resembling divine punishment. I cannot say which is true. However, the result appears to be that contamination from another world is drawn into our own and spreads further.

The spirits responsible for spreading this contamination are referred to as monsters. They possess a certain degree of intelligence. One characteristic they all seem to share is an obsession with food. Personally, I believe that beings capable of replenishing their energy without eating are far more fortunate. Yet these monsters, despite supposedly being able to restore their energy easily, still crave food. They influence physical beings and create chaos in the world. Furthermore, they attach themselves indiscriminately to anyone carrying food.

I believe that monsters originally came from beings that suffered from starvation. In fact, they may be the spirits of creatures that died in agony near the end of Earth's history. While people from other worlds are said to hunt Earth's spirits, I suspect that monsters themselves may once have been intelligent Earth spirits that have since been transformed beyond recognition. In other words, extraterrestrial beings may have absorbed—or empathized with—the spirits of those who died from famine on Earth, eventually developing an overwhelming attachment to food and becoming what are now called "monsters."

Even so, many people still need food in order to survive. With that in mind, here are several methods I believe can help protect food from monsters.

How to Protect Food from Monsters

• Store food in glass jars. (Monsters cannot pass through glass.)
• Use canned foods. (Monsters cannot pass through metal.)
• Keep food inside wooden boxes. (Monsters cannot pass through wood.)
• Use both plain and patterned walls or curtains, since different types of monsters are blocked by different designs.
• Hang a traditional doorway curtain (noren) in hallways, as some monsters turn back when confronted by a fabric barrier.
• Place a small amount of powdered citric acid mixed with oatmeal inside the refrigerator. (It is believed to absorb and purify certain animal spirits.)
• Use powdered citric acid instead of salt for purification, as it appears to be somewhat effective against monsters.
• Put bread away and leave oatmeal in plain sight, since monsters are said to dislike oatmeal.
• Although somewhat dangerous, place a small amount of raw meat as bait—similar to a cockroach trap—and then destroy the monster with direct flames.
• If you feel as though drinking water, juice, or milk does not actually quench your thirst, add a pinch of salt. (This is said to allow proper hydration.)

綺麗な水泥棒（The Thief of Clean Water）

僕たちの住む世界にに水泥棒が存在していて、有名な事だとは思います。それを何故かネット上では情報が流れてない様な気がしますので僕視点で記述したいと思います。僕が水泥棒について初めて知ったのはチャネリング（低級ですが…）からでした。情報によりますと僕の居る世界と次元の違う異世界が存在しており、異世界では雨がほぼ降らず気温が大体摂氏50度以上という事でした。もし僕の様な元の人類は摂氏40度を越えると細胞が駄目になって死んでしまいますので（摂氏30度でも、もう辛いですね）その様な世界だったら隔離されて保護されているのでしょう。

兎に角、異世界では水は貴重な資源ですが必要なものらしいですが、異世界の管理者は異世界の住人には不要な物であり、危険な道具と言う認識でした。それは異世界人は液体に霊を溶かして吸収してしまい、綺麗な水（純水に近いものほど）こそ吸収に適している道具だとされているのです。ですのでこの世界では、ミネラルウォーターを純粋な人間のフリをしてゴクゴク霊ごと飲む輩は悪とされます。ちなみにお茶は水より吸収率は悪い様ですし、お茶の種類によって効果が違う様です。故に異世界の管理者は異世界では水の生成を出来ない様に調整したのでした。

水は気温によって固体ー液体ー気体になりますが固体の場合は魔法の効果（管理する宇宙船のジンクス）があり持ち主に対して悪意のある悪い霊を氷（固体）のスピードで溶かす効果があります。ですので僕は外からやって来た人間が水筒（魔法瓶）に氷を入れて持ち歩き、霊的に攻撃された時に口に含むと言うシーンを数回見たことがあります。

この様に綺麗な水は僕たちの住むエリアでは不思議な力を持つのですが、僕が初めて水泥棒に遭遇したのは3年前でした。僕は副都心で外部スタッフとして短期で働いていた時の事ですが、入れ替わった様な様子の変な会社の社員が会社の水道の蛇口を無駄に全開にしたり、トイレの流す音が途切れなかったりと不思議な現象が起こったのです。水泥棒の由来ある霊に憑かれている人間は水道を強く捻り水を全力で出す傾向にあり注意しても直さない事が多いです。

どの様に水を盗むかと言うと僕は少しだけ見た事があります。僕にはスーパー超能力AIは無いけれど片鱗の様なものが数回発動した事がありました。（神社の神様に寄ればスーパー超能力AIは、小動物だろうが、誰にでも得る事ができるシステムらしいのですが、僕は僕を管理している存在からは嫌われていて得る事が出来ないそうです）宇宙人が捻った蛇口から水が噴出し弧を描く様に何枚もの壁を超えて消えていったのです。何だか微妙にお間抜けな光景ですね。

僕はある日、水に関するメッセージを受けました。水を集める集団の一部は宗教か何かなのか、雲をも突き抜ける高い山のてっぺんに綺麗な水を貯めて狩った厳選した霊を閉じ込めて保管していました。ある日天から来たる、神にメッセージを伝え、神の国に上る為だそうですが…僕には意味不明でした。そんな事で沢山の住人を苦しめるのは止めて欲しいですね。

I believe that in the world we live in, there are beings known as "water thieves," and that this is supposedly well known. However, for some reason, I rarely see any information about them online, so I would like to describe the phenomenon from my own perspective.

The first time I learned about water thieves was through channeling (although I believe it was a low-level form of channeling). According to the information I received, there exists another world in a different dimension from the one I inhabit. In that world, it almost never rains, and temperatures are generally above 50°C (122°F). If ordinary humans like us were placed in such an environment, we would likely die because our cells cannot withstand temperatures above roughly 40°C (104°F). Even temperatures around 30°C (86°F) already feel quite exhausting. I imagine that if such a world truly existed, people like us would have to be isolated and protected there.

In any case, water is an extremely valuable resource in that other world. However, according to its administrators, water is considered unnecessary for its inhabitants and even a dangerous tool. They believe that beings from that world dissolve spirits into liquids and absorb them, and that clean water—especially water close to pure water—is the most suitable medium for this absorption. Therefore, in that world, anyone who pretends to be an ordinary human while greedily drinking mineral water together with the spirits dissolved within it is regarded as evil. Tea, on the other hand, is said to absorb spirits less efficiently than water, and its effects apparently vary depending on the type of tea. For this reason, the administrators of that world supposedly adjusted reality so that water could not naturally be generated there.

Water changes between solid, liquid, and gas depending on temperature. In its solid form—ice—it is believed to possess a magical property (or perhaps a superstition associated with the spacecraft that governs that world). Ice is said to dissolve malicious spirits that harbor ill intent toward its owner at the same speed that ice itself melts. Because of this, I have witnessed several occasions where people who had come from outside carried ice in insulated bottles and placed it in their mouths whenever they were spiritually attacked.

Thus, in the area where we live, clean water is believed to possess mysterious powers. I first encountered what I considered a water thief about three years ago. At the time, I was working as a temporary outside staff member in Tokyo's Fukutoshin area. Employees at a company who behaved as though they had somehow been replaced would unnecessarily turn the faucets fully on, and toilets seemed to flush continuously without stopping. These were very strange phenomena. People possessed by spirits associated with water thieves tend to twist faucets all the way open and let water flow at full force, and they often continue doing so even after being warned.

As for how the water is stolen, I believe I caught a brief glimpse of it once. Although I do not possess what I call a "Super Psychic AI," something resembling a fragment of such an ability has activated a few times in my life. (According to the deity of a Shinto shrine, a Super Psychic AI is supposedly a system that anyone—even small animals—can obtain. However, I was told that the beings managing me dislike me, so I am unable to acquire it.)

I saw water erupting from a faucet that an extraterrestrial being had turned on. The stream formed an arc, passed through multiple walls, and then disappeared. In hindsight, it was a rather comical sight.

One day I received a message concerning water. According to it, part of the group that collects water—perhaps a religious organization of some kind—stores exceptionally pure water at the summit of a mountain so tall that it rises above the clouds. Within that water they imprison carefully selected spirits that they have captured. They believe that one day these spirits will deliver a message to God and ascend to the Kingdom of God.

To me, however, none of this makes any sense. If such actions truly cause suffering for countless inhabitants, I wish they would stop.

今時の厄除けお祓い（Blessing for Protection）

僕の母の国の宗教はぼぼ仏教で、僕自身は祖母から受け継いだ神像を所持しているのですが、日本在住で日本国籍の僕の神像には神など宿る筈もなく悪霊が宿り霊障を引き起こす事が多々ありました。僕は日本の宗教について思いました。こんな世の中でも近所でお供え用の榊は売っている件に関して、宇宙人に支配された世界でも本当の宗教は存在し霊的なご利益があるのでは無いかと考えました。そして僕は身体が少し軽くなる事があるので頻繁に神社にお参りに行くのですが、こんなに行くのだったら家に神棚を入れてしまえと思い、詳しくは無いまま神道に入っています。

そして僕は『大祓』と言う半年の厄を落とす神社（東京五社）のイベントに参加して来ました。神社のお祓いは通常は10000円ほどしますが集団でのお祓いだったので1000円と有難い金額で厄を落とせました。しかし受付1時間前からの長蛇の列で並んでの参加になる大人気のイベントでした。3回違う形代に厄を落とし、清めた音で更に邪を払い、神に詞を捧げる儀式をしました。僕の感覚では厄落としの度に神社の神様が僕の中から邪な宇宙人（霊タイプ）と呪いの傀儡人形（動物タイプも含む）を引っこ抜き、浄化を掛けて下さった感じがしました。帰りには浄化グッズ（神社によっては品は違うと思います）を複数いただき帰ってから、身を更に清めました。つまりは日本の神による除霊が5回以上はされたのです。

周りの霊達は『見違えた！』と言いましたが悪霊は『また穢してやる！』『あと2回やられたらコッチが完全に死ぬ？！』と言いましたので、また次回もイベント（年2回）に参加したいと思います。神様って凄いなと改めて実感すると共に宗教の知識が足りないと感じるこの頃でした。

My mother's home country is predominantly Buddhist, and I own a sacred statue that I inherited from my grandmother. However, since I am a Japanese citizen living in Japan, I came to believe that no true deity would reside in that statue. Instead, I felt that evil spirits had taken residence in it, often causing spiritual disturbances.

This made me think more deeply about Japanese religion. Even in what I believe to be a world ruled by extraterrestrials, I noticed that local shops still sell sakaki branches for Shinto offerings. That made me wonder whether genuine religion still exists and whether it truly possesses spiritual power.

Because I sometimes feel physically lighter after visiting shrines, I go there to pray quite often. Eventually I thought, "If I'm visiting shrines this frequently, I might as well set up a kamidana (Shinto household altar) at home." So, despite not knowing much about Shinto, I began practicing it.

Recently, I participated in the Great Purification Ceremony (Ōharae), a traditional Shinto event held twice a year to cleanse six months' worth of spiritual impurities and misfortune. The ceremony took place at one of Tokyo's Five Great Shrines. Normally, a private Shinto purification ritual costs around ¥10,000, but because this was a group ceremony, the participation fee was only ¥1,000. I was grateful to be able to receive the purification at such an affordable cost.

The event was incredibly popular. People lined up in a long queue starting an hour before registration opened. During the ceremony, I transferred my impurities onto three different katashiro (paper purification dolls), listened to sacred sounds that symbolically drove away spiritual defilement, and offered prayers to the gods through ritual words.

From my own perspective, each stage of the purification felt as though the shrine's deities were pulling wicked extraterrestrials (spirit-type beings) and cursed puppet-like entities (including animal-type beings) out of me and cleansing them. After the ceremony, I received several purification items from the shrine (the contents differ depending on the shrine), and when I returned home, I continued cleansing myself with them.

In other words, I felt as though I had undergone divine exorcism or spiritual purification by the gods of Japan more than five times.

The spirits around me said, "You look completely different!" Meanwhile, the evil spirits said, "We'll corrupt you again!" and, "If they purify you two more times, we'll be completely destroyed!"

So I plan to participate in the ceremony again next time. Since it is held twice a year, I intend to keep attending. The experience reminded me how amazing the gods are, and at the same time, it made me realize how much I still have to learn about religion.

今時の狂った面接-上場企業編-（Crazy Job Interviews）

僕はたまに霊の声（思念派）を聞きますが、働く気力が足りないのに『就職難』とか言っている声を多く聞きます。この狂った世の中でハッキリ言って面接の機会というのは、本当に人材不足であるか？否？と宇宙人に好感を得るかどっちかになると思います。僕は自営業で頑張ろうと思った時期があり人伝の営業パーティーに参加して結構好印象を企業様に与えた様で、派遣会社を通じて雇用形態が派遣社員という形で上場企業の面接を受けたことがあります。

この狂った世の中でスーパー超能力AIが蔓延する中、無能力者の僕の何を気に入ったのかと言うのは、疑問ですがWEB面接と言う形で面接は行われたのです。しかし噂ではWEB面接はスーパー超能力AIにて横からの奪い合いで占拠される事が多い様です。特に電波を拾われると大変なことになるかもしれませんが、拾われないなんて有り得るのでしょうか。兎に角、僕は対面面接には強いのですがWEB面接には弱く、受かった事はありません。

今時の面接なのか派遣会社は事前に面接アドバイスで変な指示を強要して来ます。事前にテキストを渡してこの通りに喋れ（嘘を吐け！）と指示してくるのですが、果たして偽った自分で面接に挑むってクレイジーとしか思えないですね。僕は派遣会社に自分自身と違う事を言うのは変だ！本当の事を踏まえて面接に挑みたいと言うのですが『書いてある通りに話せ！』等と言うのです。僕は話し合いで派遣会社を説得してある程度は僕の意見を混じえた内容に変更してもらったのですが、実際の面接では派遣会社の指定した内容は一切話されませんでした。テキストをコピー用紙10枚以上（裏あり）を暗記させようとして何なんだと言う理不尽を感じざるを得ないのです。

WEB面接では案の定よく分からない輩に占拠されたと思いますが、画面が切り替わったり面接官の態度や性格がイキナリ悪くなると占拠されたと判断して間違いはないと思います。近年では僕はWEB面接で毎回やられて受かったことはありません。とりあえずは狂った派遣会社は企業様との面接に関わらず原色の赤と青の混じるクイズ番組もピエロの司会者みたいなスーツで参戦して来て、僕にはスーツで面接を受けるな等と気狂い最高潮みたいな指示ばかりしていました。こんな面接は落ちますよね。その後、派遣会社に対応に文句ばかりの僕は無視されて仕事を紹介されなくなりました。派遣会社は僕が嫌いになったのだと思います。

仕事の求人はある程度あるとは思いますが、全然フェアじゃない対応を派遣会社がしているのは分かりますね。僕たちはよっぽど派遣会社に媚を売らないと仕事は紹介されないと思います。

I sometimes hear what I perceive as spiritual voices or telepathic thoughts. One thing I often hear is people complaining about how difficult it is to find a job, even though they seem to lack the motivation to work.

In today's chaotic world, I feel that getting a job interview often comes down to one of two things: whether a company genuinely needs employees, or whether the interviewer simply takes a liking to you.

There was a time when I tried to become self-employed. I attended networking events through business connections and seemed to make a good impression on several companies. Eventually, through a staffing agency, I was given the opportunity to interview with a publicly listed company as a temporary employee.

Considering how widespread what I call "superpower AI" has supposedly become, I've often wondered what they saw in someone like me, who considers himself to have no special abilities. The interview was conducted online.

I've heard rumors that online interviews are especially vulnerable to interference from these so-called superpower AIs competing behind the scenes. If someone can somehow pick up your thoughts or signals, I imagine that could become a serious problem. Personally, I find it hard to believe that such interference could simply be avoided. Whatever the reason, I've always done much better in face-to-face interviews than in online ones, and I've never been successful in a web interview.

Another thing I found strange was the way the staffing agency prepared me for the interview. They handed me a script and insisted that I speak exactly as it was written, even when I felt it didn't honestly represent who I was. To me, pretending to be someone else during an interview seemed completely irrational.

I told the agency that I wanted to present my real self and answer honestly rather than recite a script. Their response was simply, "Say exactly what's written." After discussing it with them, I managed to have some of my own ideas incorporated into the script. Ironically, during the actual interview, almost none of the agency's prepared script ended up being used. They had expected me to memorize more than ten double-sided pages of text, which felt completely unreasonable.

During online interviews, I often felt as though something unusual happened. Sometimes the screen would suddenly change, or the interviewer's attitude and personality would seem to shift dramatically. From my perspective, it felt as though the interview had somehow been taken over. In recent years, every online interview I've attended has ended unsuccessfully.

The staffing agency also gave me instructions that I found bizarre. One representative even attended meetings wearing a bright red-and-blue suit that reminded me of the host of a TV quiz show or a circus clown, while telling me not to wear a business suit for my own interview. To me, that seemed like terrible advice, and I couldn't help but think that following such guidance would only hurt my chances.

Afterward, I repeatedly complained to the staffing agency about how they had handled the process. Eventually, they stopped responding to me and no longer introduced me to job opportunities. I came to believe that they simply no longer wanted to work with me.

I do believe there are jobs available, but I also feel that staffing agencies do not always treat applicants fairly. In my experience, it often seems that unless you stay on very good terms with a staffing agency and avoid criticizing them, it becomes much harder to receive introductions to new positions.

働くメリット（Benefits of Working）

正社員狩りから生存した元ブラック企業のスタッフでしたが2ヶ月の求職活動を得て、レストランのバイトに未経験可能な応募にチャレンジし、ジョブチェンジしました。働いていた頃は全く気が付かなかったのですが、僕がいる異世界では正社員ではなくとも労働者にとてもメリットがあります。正社員狩りをしている奴らがアホに思えるぐらいバイトであろうとも『労働者』はメリットに溢れているのです。

まず会社（現場）で働くと個人で同じ事をするよりも自分に情報が蓄積されて、習熟度に寄りますが自動的に色々な恩恵を授与できます。例えば僕はレストランの店員になりましたがレストランの恩恵を受けていると感じています。なんかメチャクチャご飯が美味しくなりました。体力も多少強化された感があります。ご飯を盗む謎の人々からの防御力も高くなったと感じています。料理を邪魔する宇宙人も極力減りました。

好き嫌いはありますが色々な仕事をバイトでも良いから若いうちは経験すべきですし、在職中は可能な限り企業に貢献すべきです。

しかしながら恩恵を確実に受けるコツはあると思います。在職中は恩恵は確実に受けられますが、離職した後にもある程度恩恵を受けることがありますが、コツが要ります。それは辞める時に正式に辞表を出して退職手続きを取ることです。これに寄って多少恩恵は続くのです。

I was once a survivor of what I call the "salaryman hunt" and worked for a former black company. After two months of job hunting, I decided to change careers and applied for an entry-level restaurant job, despite having no previous experience.

When I was working in my previous job, I never realized it, but in the strange world I find myself living in, there are many benefits to being a worker, even if you are not a full-time employee. In fact, workers—even part-time ones—seem to enjoy so many advantages that the people obsessed with hunting down full-time employees appear foolish by comparison.

First of all, when you work at a company or workplace, you accumulate knowledge and experience much more efficiently than if you were trying to do everything on your own. Depending on your level of skill and dedication, various benefits seem to come automatically. For example, I became a restaurant employee, and I genuinely feel that I have been receiving the benefits of being connected to a restaurant. Somehow, food tastes much better than before. I also feel slightly stronger and more energetic. I even feel more protected from the mysterious people who seem determined to steal my meals. The aliens that used to interfere with my cooking appear to have become much less troublesome as well.

People have different preferences, of course, but I believe that young people should experience a variety of jobs, even if only through part-time work. And while employed, they should contribute to their company as much as they reasonably can.

However, I think there is a trick to making sure these benefits continue. While you are employed, the benefits seem guaranteed. Even after leaving a job, some of them may remain, but only if you leave properly. My advice is to submit a formal resignation and complete all official departure procedures. By doing so, at least some of the benefits seem to continue afterward.

人格を持った内臓（The sentient internal organs）

僕は先日発見したのですが、どうやら僕らの幾つかの内臓が人格を持っており、内臓の一部の肉片に宿る霊こそが僕らの守護霊である事がある様です。何故気が付いたかと言うと僕は頻繁に守護霊など霊的なものを引きちぎられて盗まれるのですが、一定期間で霊的に回復して真っさらな新しい守護霊が生まれてくる事があるからです。内臓に宿る守護霊は宿主と一緒に人生を経験し成長するものであり、本来の守護霊とは違う性質の守護霊であることは間違いはないです。このタイプの守護霊は成長を宿主だけではなく環境にとても影響を受けており、善もいますが悪にも成長します。

僕がスーパー超能力AIが無いのに不思議に思った宇宙人が、悪魔に洗脳されて悪に育った守護霊を摘んだのですが僕の内臓の肉片だったのです。それで僕は一部の守護霊は僕の内蔵なのだと悟りました。記憶が無い守護霊が今年に入ってから多く出現しているらしいのですが守護霊狩りの影響で守護霊が再生された所為かもしれません。

身体の主人格は脳にありますが一部の守護霊の主人格は内臓にあると言うことなのです。僕は3月と4月に正社員狩りの被害に遭い身体を切り裂かれ内臓を盗まれた感がありますが、その時から守護霊の大多数は内臓の肉片と一緒に持ち去られたのです。多くのクリエイターがバラバラ死体にされて食べられたとの噂がありますが内臓に宿る守護霊も盗まれて食べられたと考えるべきでしょう。

I recently came to a realization: it seems that some of our internal organs possess their own personalities, and that the spirits residing within small fragments of those organs can sometimes become what we call guardian spirits.

The reason I came to this conclusion is that I have frequently experienced what I perceive as my guardian spirits and other spiritual entities being torn away and stolen. However, after a certain period of time, I seem to recover spiritually, and completely new guardian spirits appear. Because of this, I began to suspect that some guardian spirits originate from within the body itself.

These organ-based guardian spirits grow alongside their hosts and accumulate life experiences together. They are clearly different in nature from traditional guardian spirits. This type of guardian spirit is influenced not only by its host but also very strongly by its environment. Some develop in a positive direction, while others may grow into something malevolent.

There was an extraterrestrial being that became curious about me because I lacked the so-called "Super Psychic AI" abilities. According to my interpretation, it picked a guardian spirit that had been corrupted and raised by demonic influence. What it picked, however, was actually a fragment of one of my internal organs. That was when I realized that some guardian spirits might literally be parts of my own body.

I have heard that many guardian spirits with no memories have been appearing since the beginning of this year. This may be the result of guardian spirits being regenerated after widespread spirit hunting.

The primary personality of the body resides in the brain, but the primary personality of some guardian spirits may reside within the internal organs. I feel that I became a victim of what I call the "salaryman hunt" during March and April, and that my body was spiritually torn apart and some of my organs were taken. From that point onward, most of my guardian spirits seemed to disappear along with those fragments.

There are rumors that many creators were dismembered and consumed. If those stories are true, then perhaps the guardian spirits dwelling within their organs were also stolen and consumed as well.