just recently i've recieved news from a friend that she has broken up with,,,or rather, was dumped by her boyfriend of almost two years.
normally i'd not take initiative to acutally post about these events, especially since its in consideration of a friend's life...however...her situation actually scares me a bit.
as by memory, the events of last last summer, they hit off to a great start, as even their major differences acted like some unbreakable bond. however, the reason of their break up was...miscommunication?
suddenly, one guilty party just stopped calling...and rarely talking on defense of "I am too busy"
while "busy" = watching tv, msn and sleeping...
ok......like we'd all know, ofcourse university would be busy, but if you still cared about your girlfriend, you'd be able to find time to atleast talk with her, especially if you guys are barely able to meet because of the difference in age levels and education locations. if you'd really cared, sacrifice a bit of tv time -its okay if you miss a episode of your favorite drama or something, thanks to technology, you can simply watch it online later. if you really cared, cease msn for a while just to give her a phone call...5-10 mins each day would still be awesome!...or better yet, just talk to her ON msn while you're busy with all your other conversations too.
atleast just show some signs that you still care.
although there is nothing wrong with my current relationship and i am fully happy ( and purely in love<3 ) somehow i just get reminded of the same feelings i felt as my friend right now. however with my previous relationship...it was an opposite situation, however resulting in the same feeling. for the time being, lets call my friend K-chan.
K (current) :
feels as if she's a TOY in the hands of her boyfriend. whenever he wants to, he would suddenly go see her, however when he doesn't...she wouldn't hear from him for days. while she makes attempts at communications, she is blamed of constantly annoying him.
Me (previous) :
felt like a TOY in the hands of a little kid who just doesn't want to let it go, simply for the reason that he likes the way it looks. and by 'not let go' i literally mean, to spend every waking second possible with the 'object' --even resulting in stalker-esque behaviour.
though these two cases are so entirely different...its resulted in the same feeling by atleast one person in a relationship. no matter how cliche and corny this may sound...a relationship is indeed a two way street...if one is not functioning well...it'll surely cause conflicts for the two.
so...this really gets me to think (and even before this thought has frequently made visits to my mind...), just what exactly makes a perfect relationship...and exactly what is it?
before, when i was naive (..well i still am = =) i always just thought...a boyfriend is:
* simply someone who you can cry to with all your problems knowing that they'll always be there for you.
* someone you claim as 'yours' and maybe even show him off to friends and acquiantances...
* just someone to have 'certain fun' with...ie..making out...etc(?)
just based on these thought, i can recall that in the past...i have never gone on proper dates with all my past ex's after we have achieved the 'relationship' status...
as well as so many other factors which i have never considered either...
but i do find it funny...that in my current relationship, is where i have learned the most what exactly it means to be carry out a relationship with someone. as much selfish as my naive thought #1 is, it's still true. to be in a relationship with someone, does always guarantee you with someone whom you can seek comfort in times of distress -someone who will always be there for you. and it should be the exact same vice-versa as well. however, more importantly, a relationship is about:
* honesty and trust -although you probably won't realize just how far these two simple words will get you until its just too late...
* knowing their faults yet still managing to find way to love them unconditionally, even small physical 'problems' which one cannot easily change to change at all. for example, i am much taller than my boyfriend, and although that causes awkward moments, it wont stop my love. my love isn't so weak that it can't even jump over that 10cm difference barrier. my love and feelings are so strong, that it doesn't even need to attempt to jump over that little barrier, it'll easily soar over it.
although there are still many more reasons...i'm not going to list them all out, as that will take forever...and i need to get off this blog to start studying for my final tomorrow too...*dies*
but to be in a relationship should be a sacred bond, not simply a word you use to describe yourself of your status.
[ i really do hate it when people get together just for the sake of being able to say..."i have a boyfriend/girlfriend"...that's just really pathetic and a total waste of either party's time. sorry, but it really is quite sad. ]
i think im still missing out on a lot of stuff i would like to say...maybe in another entry...though no one ever reads this anyways = =haha...
ok....i think i need to take a nap before i hit the books again...my head is pounding like crazy even as i am currently writing this...so...
if this doesnt make sense at all and/or is super off topic, hopefully you'd understand why that is so! lol
--> SUPERRRR sleep deprived!
but just after typing out some stuff...i realize it's acutally quite funny...how the person i've learned the most about relationships is with a tbs. but this only makes me realize, just how special my love is, and although you'll never see this, i'd like for you to know, that no matter what happens in the future, and what roads we'll pass through, whether together or on our separate ways (which i sincerely hope wont be the cast...) i'll definitely never be able to forget you, and will forever be eternally grateful for all that you've taught me, just by being yourself. truly, ありがとうございます。
I really am quite lucky to be able to have you in my world --and i hope you'll stay forever in my heart =]
:*:・(￣∀￣)・:*:
