この三年間、ずっと、日本のことが好きになりました。知れる知ればほど、嫌いになちゃた。前いつかまだ日本へ留学したかったけど、新聞やニュースなど見ると、日本の怖さがよく分かってる。なぜ、毎日怖い（ここでは全然想像出来ぬ）事件が発生するかな？殺人、痴漢、毒気、自殺などが。日本はあんまり安全な国ではないと認めないはいけない。
好きなことを嫌になると、自分はもう。。。
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沒有下雨的一天，一起身，我開門俾隻狗出去行一下，點知上面又有一隻新狗隻不停望住我隻狗響度叫．係一隻細狗仔，好活躍，我．．．望住佢叫佢唔好嘈，仲用左手指左佢一下，細聲叫佢唔好咁嘈．．．然後回家．
見自己隻 狗好似好悶，再俾佢出去，今次我陪佢，怕佢怕上面隻狗，我同狗狗行遠一點，諗住避開佢．點知佢仍然好大聲叫， 一望之下成半個身出左黎．我見到一隻蜜蜂，想同狗狗返入家內，到門口狗狗另轉身行多一行．．．
突然砰的一聲，我不以為然，望一望，點知上面隻狗跌左黎我個花園．我好驚！佢行番起身，狗狗跟左佢一兩步，我大叫上面有無人，但無人理．我立即將狗狗放黠屋內．另轉一望番出去，上面隻狗已經訓低左，好大力透氣．．．我嚇死左．因為第一次見住一個生命響自己面前經歷死亡．
我按門鐘無人應，雖然上面有另一個住客．我祈禱，祈禱祈禱祈禱．．．然後隻狗仔已無呼吸．．．打左電話去愛護動物協會，好耐之後先有人回覆，隻狗已經死左啦．．．
死主人拾起佢既時候，佢慘叫左一聲，主人無特別想同佢睇醫生，拎佢番去．．．
我害死左隻狗．．．係生命，唔係狗．．．
我係唔係害死左一個生命？
SEED:
Sow in having fellowship through studying the Word
Sow in doing right and good on every flight no matter it is a full flight or a half full flight
Sow in preparing in learning Japanese
Sow in knowing people in J
Sow in speaking good not evil
EXPECTATION:
A advanced position in J in Japan in next year
A road that God has prepared for me in Japan, with things and people I need
A higher fellowship with God
Learning to cook tasty food
My family come to Japan
Prepare me to the next level in BHM
IF...
You could take me out of this place
transform this situation
give me a new holy-loving-home to stay
take this life to the highest place
and send me back to wrap it up into a good place
so that I can say God is a Good God He who is Omnipotent in everything
then I will say You are God, a Almighty God.
It can't be bought by gold or coins
nor can it be exchanged by cash dollars
yet, you will have all of my heart
until the days that my breath lasts.
I dare not to test you God.
who am I on earth to test you Lord?
Nor do I dare to challenge you Lord.
What result could it be to those who did so?
What I am asking for is a full real salvation.
A salvation that You have been expressing for so long.
All I ask is just the same old thing,
but this time I need the REAL one Lord.
I need to ride over the spirits of satan
I need to fight them down under my feet
Neither of them can deter my decisions to be good
Neither of them can make me say bad from my mouth
Neither of them can let the lies and doubts prevails in my heart
I need a total victory with TRUE salvation in this life
a life that only happens once
and please don't devalue it to none
IF...
You are God Almighty, as whom they have been saying about
IF...
You are that faithful and of faithfulness in your spirit as if what they have been saying
Then please take this prayer from my heart
to transform this life and the family into the House of Lord
Let the day I die saying God is a Good God
He who is real and a living God
He who is able to save thousands and millions lost souls
He who is the King of kings, Lord of lords
that He is never a hyprocrite whom boosts around
that His servants are not speaking empty words with big mouths
Lord, who am I on earth?
I am just a little soul with flesh covering.
My soul can't prevail the spirits of satan
only Your Holy Spirit does!
Let Thy Spirit dwells in and upon me
Hang me on the Cross with Jesus
Let Jesus be my Savior now and forever
so that on that very day,
I would say God is a Good God
when my hands and legs turn straight
God, I am sorry God.
I can do nothing about it God.
I admit I am incapable to transform it Lord
that's why I need you Lord, that's why I need you Lord.
Lord, it is Your Word which says
If anyone one believes Jesus is the Son of God
Came to earth and died on a cross
Shed His precious blood for us
And rose again on the third day
Now sitting on the right hand of the throne now and then
Then the ones is purchased by His blood
He then belongs to the Kingdom of Heaven
Lord, because it is Thy Word
please take it Lord.
I believe Jesus is the Son of the Living God
He who I lack respect
He who I lack communicate
He who I lack listen to
And He who I lack fear of
which all are my faults
But please look upon Your Name, Lord
Not mine oh My Lord.
Take this prayer Lord
So that on that day I can say with all my heart
that God is a Good God.
I am reading something from The Tabernacle, it is something about prayer. It makes me think of something happen in this April. My friend, a 10-year-known friend, went to Singapore with me for joining Benny Hinn's international crusade there. Sadly, my another friend could not experience such wonderful life-changing event. I really pray that she can do it in the future.
I can still remember the week before, on 6th April, 2007 a Friday night in Chicago, I had a dream. I saw that I was watching from the stage seeing Pastor Benny saying that, "God is going to train His people in China!" Just this exclamation, then here comes the end of my dream. I was awaken from my dream for a few second and then I fell asleep again. When I truly awoke, I remembered the dream and I asked God, "What do you mean by the dream?"I just knew that it was from God. I didn't know why and I just asked Him for the reason. But there was no answer from God. I just put it on my heart and went back to Hong Kong, thinking of the Easter service happened in Los Angeles.
Though the dream only lasted for a few seconds, it can't be erased naturally. I didn't give any pressure on it yet it lingered in my mind. I asked God, "what do you mean?" and there was no answer from God even though when I went back to Hong Kong. Finally, the day come when I headed to Singapore along on Friday. I said in my heart to God, "God, it is not my word but yours, if you said it then you make it because it is your Word." I said in my heart with hardness.
When I got Singapore, I arrived the hotel and then headed to the Singapore Indoor Stadium immediately. I was scared and worried by the number of people that I saw! There were heads and heads only. Though my friend, S, was not there due to his schedule, I really wanted to tell him what the situation was immediately. Finally, I could get in. I prayed and praised. In my heart, I could not stop thinking about the dream that I had a week ago. I prayed throughout the whole day and whole service that, "God, if you say it, then you do it! I didn't say it, you said it! Keep your words! I will not go back to Hong Kong with empty hands." "I will not go back with empty hands, I will not go back with empty hands!"
The only lines that I remember was "If you said it, you do it, I will not go back with empty hands!" I even cannot remembver how many times I said this to God firmly, seemed like had had a great negotiation with Him. Yet, God did not look for my negotiation. I had got nothing about that on that night. I thought, I still had 2 nights to go and I was not going to let go.
The second night, S was there. It seemed that he was pretty amazed and new to this kind of service. I was really happy to know that cuz I am benefited from this too. God introduced this to me and I am glad. I did not tell anyone about the dream, not even to my family, of course, nor my friends. Who would think that God really talks to me though it really happened once audibly. "It is not by might nor power but by My Spirit saith of the Lord of Host" (Zech 4:6)
The second night, I still held firm to God. It was a little bit like Jacob wrestling with God in Penial. But, the prayer was added with a little bit of worries by myself. Finally, nothing happened still. I didn't tell my friend at that time. On my way to the hotel, indeed my heart was so troubled! My heart was so troubled that when I went to my hotel I cried. I cried with non-stopping tears. Even today, right now, when I think of that night, I can shred a few tear. The feeling is so true and so real. I didn't know why I would cry for this. It may only be a "dream" but I just could not let it go naturally from my mind, heart and soul. Yet, I made a decision. That was not the last day and last second so that I would not let go of Thy Word because it is not my word but Thy Word. I miss God, I like God, I love God though I am mixed with earthly dust and fleshly will as long as I carry the earthly dust. I am not shame to say I love you Lord with Thy Spirit put in my life long before I was born. It was another special day that I have found out that I, Elisha, truly love God and miss Jesus. I am weak. I fail. I may even perform bad. But on that special day, God let me see that how much I love Him because He first chose to love me.
The last night, Oh it was the last night. How my trouble heart was. I started to understand what the meaning of intercession is on those 3 days. It is a prayer that hold on the Word of God rather than on the "confidence" created by man on earth and we called it faith. Instead, faith only comes from above, not by struggling. Intercession is holding on God's Word in prayer. I was a little tired and I told God too. But God was annoyed by my words saying, "It is not my words, it is yours. If you say it, you do it. I believe. I am not willing to go back with empty hands." To my amazed, with no real imagination of what God is going to do or how He planned to do. Pastor Benny asked what else of nationalities were attending the meeting on that night. We all stood up and also to my amazed he asked one by one where we were from. When he reached the group China, with no slight expectation at all, he said, "suddenly, I felt like asking all the Chinese to come on the stage and pray together." My heart or I should say, my whole being was stopped for a few seconds. It was stunning. Immediately, I knew! I knew that I knew that I knew that it was from God. God, on that night, had heard my prayer, had wrestled with me, had showed me something about His Word. Yet, I have learnt once again the difference between the presence and the power of God. It was just the tip of the iceberg yet it was good.
More than that, we sang, we praised and we prayed. With a bonus, we were on the show and I had got a little hug from Pastor Benny Hinn. But sometimes, till now, I am still thinking, "God, what do you mean by the dream?"Was there any meaning with the content, I don't know. Someday, I believe if God say then He will finish it and He is going to train His people in China. But I saw other meaning. With faith, which faith comes from the Word of the Lord, only this faith can please God.
“Faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the word of God” (Ro 10:17).
Without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that…he rewards those who earnestly seek him” (Heb11:6 )
God surely will give tests. Now I am sure. And God absolutely will observe you during the tests. He observes how you handle the tests no matter what the results seem to be. God observes you when you are in the wilderness and God ALSO observes you when you are in the promised land. Neither of the places are good if you are living without holding, living and abiding with the Word of the Lord. Be soaked with His Word is the key.
God placed His Word two years ago. It is a very big one. It is the one that without end. It takes a life-time to see it happen and I cannot forget it in my whole being. I wanted to give up and I wanted to forget those sentences. I tried and tried. Yet, I cannot drop it. I don't know why. The only reason I can give is that it is simply God's Word. If he says it, he will do it, he must finish it. Pray for it, remind it, make it to be a non-stop reminding to Him till He gets annoyed. Maybe when the day we meet in heaven, He will remind you, with a laughter, that you annoyed Him like a child annoys a father on earth. Though it is annoying, he hears it.
Pray, not by the words of man, which involves tones and sound only, but by the Word of the Lord our God with the supplication of the Holy Spirit, which is the very deep of the depth of the Spirit of our life-long-unable-fully-discovered-understood God.
It seems that these are not my words but God is teaching me again through the Holy Spirit through my fingers only.
"If you say it, you have to do it because these are not my words but Your Word. I don't care, I am not going back with empty hands my Lord. I believe if you say it, you do it, I believe. I am not going back with empty hands Lord!"
Manessah & Ephraim
17-YEAR-OLD Joseph & 30-YEAR-OLD Joseph
The unbearable Israelites in the wilderness
Jonah's thinking and feeling V.S. God's
自己開始明白神對人的不信有多不耐煩，因為不信的根源在於一種負面的態度．一次兩次都還好，但原來死性不改地負面真是很難去接受．maybe I should really buy a new book for the coming fellowship again.
有時真係覺得好彩，生命中有好多因素，而可以離開某一些人或某一些事或者係某一境況有好多，係一個祝福．因為離開了一些對生命無利而有害的事．近日因為一個老友大讚新加坡，自己都開始諗一下新加坡係唔係真係一個咁好既地方．睇時代週刊講新加坡，真係好似好好，我都覺新加坡比香港，響某些地方係好住一點，生活得放開一點，不過實在太多雨水同太熱．近日真係臭到一種自由既感覺．不過又想到一個親人的問題．．．希望佢解決到啦．．．
suede... something is coming out when I am listening to these old but forever favourite songs. It feels like it calls my spirit to awake again. It is just like a dormant seed to be watered. Neil Codling's backing vocal is a chime. Bernard Butler's guitar can calls into... part of the deep How come? But I don't want this substitude cuz I know what it is... I want the real thing
Jehovah God is your :
Elohim (Creator),
Yahweh (Lord),
El Shaddai (Supplier),
Adonai (Master),
Jireh (Provider),
Rophe (Healer),
Nissi (Banner),
Mikkadesh (Santifier),
Tsidkenu (Righteousness),
Shalom (Peace),
Rohi (Shepherd),
and Shammah (Abiding Presence).