A reader of this blog asked me some questions. I thought that I'd answer her questions here, in case anyone else finds them interesting.
Q#1: What surprised you most about living in Japan?
I have 2 answers to this question.
The first thing that surprised me the most:
The concentration of people in a rather small area. (限られてるスペースに人の多さ）.
I'm from Texas. I lived in a large city (San Antonio) until junior high school, but there were very few places crowded with people. Even when there was a big festival, it didn't feel very crowded.
When I was 11 years old, my family moved to the countryside. We couldn't see our neighbors' houses. All around us were trees and grass and sky. I had very few experiences of feeling crowded. I couldn't hear neighbors' voices because their houses were too far away. There was a dirt road in front of my house. If a car drove past my house, we would often go to the window to see who it was. It was an event!
"Oh, it's Mr. Schneider in his truck! Hi, Mr. Schneider!"
Mr. Schneider would wave to us. (手を振る)
"It's Mr. Zaiontz on his tractor. Hi, Mr. Zaiontz!"
Mr. Zaiontz would smile and wave.
Our dogs would go crazy barking! 
Such excitement!
When we drove to town (about 20 minutes away by car), we drove down a long, beautiful, lonely road. There were almost no other cars. If we did pass a car, we would wave at the other driver, even if we didn't know them. It would be rude to ignore (無視する) another human in such an isolated (ぽつん） place.
When I first came to Japan, my plane landed at Narita. My husband (then fiance) met me at the airport, and we spent a few days in Tokyo sightseeing.
Wow!!! So many people!!! Unbelievable crowds of people!!! How can there be so many people in one place?!!! I didn't know how to walk in such a crowded place. I bumped into people almost every step. I kept saying, "Sumimasen! Sumimasen!" But my fiance told me, "You can't apologize to every person. There are too many people. It's natural that you'll bump into some of them. You don't need to say 'Excuse me' every time."
My husband told me that Oita was a much smaller town, not so crowded as Tokyo. That was true, but...
It was still much more crowded in Oita than in my hometown in Texas. When there was a festival in Oita, it was difficult to move down the street. Everywhere we went on the weekends was crowded with so many people! Kijima? So crowded! Downtown Tokiwa? So crowded! (This was the late 1980's.) Sasamuta Shrine to see the wisteria (藤)? So many people! There seemed to be no escape from crowds and crowds of people.
The second thing that surprised me so much:
What made it much more stressful is that I stuck out like a sore thumb in Oita. (すごく目立ってました) I'm a tall foreigner. Everywhere I went, people stared at me like I was an alien. I could feel so many eyes focused on my every move. It was so stressful for a shy person like me.
If people had approached naturally and said, "Konnichiwa!" in a welcoming way, it would have been a much better experience. But no one smiled at me. They just stared (ジロジロ見る). Sometimes children ran away, screaming, "外人! 外人! 逃げろ!" Older children and adults stared silently as I passed. But just after I passed, I could hear them whispering, "Gaijin!" Some children or high school boys would shout at me, "Harro!" And then their friends would laugh very loudly. They didn't want to actually speak with me. Shouting "Harro!" was like a way to show their friends how daring and brave they were. I didn't know how to react or respond.
It was actually a very lonely time. I wish I had the opportunity to study Japanese before I came to Japan, but there were no Japanese classes at that time in the schools I attended. If I could speak Japanese, maybe it would have been easier to connect with people. But I had heard that Japanese people study English in junior high and high school, so I expected to be able to have basic conversations.
I couldn't make any friends. There were a few people who were very curious about foreigners. They would invite me to their house. I would think, "Yay! Maybe I'll make a friend." But actually, they only were curious. They wanted to spend a little time looking at the strange foreigner. Then, after their curiosity was satisfied, they weren't interested in becoming deeper friends.
To tell you the truth, it was a very hard time. My only Japanese friend was my fiance. He had lived in Texas for a few years, so he knew the kind of life I was used to. He worked during the week, but on the weekends we went all around Kyushu. The nature was beautiful. But the lack of natural human connection made me feel very discouraged.
Now that I have lived in my neighborhood for almost 30 years, I feel much more comfortable. Everyone knows me. I'm not interesting. I'm just a regular おばちゃん. Nothing special. No one asks me where I'm from anymore. No children shout "Harro!" or run away from me screaming, "Gaijin!" No one whispers "Gaijin!" after I pass by anymore. I'm too boring (面白くない). Being boring is so wonderful! It means that I fit in. I'm part of the neighborhood.
Learning to speak Japanese and having shared the experience of living my adult life in Japan with all the other people my age mean that I'm no longer an alien. I love my life here now. I love Japan. I love Oita. It's home.
Have you ever been an outsider in a new place? How was it for you