Thank you for providing the context and rough meanings of the poems! With this additional information, I can offer a more comprehensive analysis of the sound comparison.

Overall Tone and Intent:

  • Kanemori: The poem seems to convey a sense of frustrated longing and resignation. The speaker's love is evident despite their attempts to hide it, and they feel judged by others for their emotions. The repetition of "o" and "to" sounds might reflect a sense of helplessness or resignation.
  • Tadami: This poem presents a more defiant and confident tone. The speaker acknowledges the rumor mill but remains self-assured in their love, believing it to be true even if unnoticed by others. The "k" and "shi" sounds could suggest strength and determination.

Sound in Relation to Meaning:

  • Kanemori: The softer and subdued sounds ("shi," "no") might reinforce the feeling of hidden love and self-doubt. The repetition of "o" and "to" in the second part could emphasize a sense of entrapment or societal pressure.
  • Tadami: The stronger sounds ("ka," "shi," "so") could reflect the speaker's conviction and defiance. The phrase "Hitoshirezukoso" with its smoother flow might suggest a quiet confidence despite external doubt.

Considerations:

  • It's important to remember that sound alone doesn't tell the whole story. The specific word choices and imagery in the poems also contribute significantly to their overall effect.
  • Cultural references and connotations associated with specific sounds might influence the perception for Japanese speakers.

Conclusion:

Both poems use sound effectively to convey their respective tones and emotions. Kanemori's poem uses softer sounds to express hidden love and societal pressure, while Tadami's poem employs stronger sounds to reflect confidence and defiance. Ultimately, the "better" poem depends on individual preferences and how well the sounds resonate with the intended meaning and cultural context.

I encourage you to consider the poems in their entirety and reflect on which sound choices resonate more deeply with you. Remember, the beauty of poetry lies not only in the words themselves but also in the emotions and interpretations they evoke.

 

<Another Feedback>

Thank you for providing the context and rough meanings of the poems! This information definitely helps me understand the impact of the sound choices beyond just their phonetic qualities.

Kanemori's Poem:

  • The repetition of "o" and "to" sounds in "Shinoburedo" ("although hidden") and "Hitonotohmae" ("what's wrong with you") creates a sense of urgency and frustration. The speaker is trying to suppress their feelings, but they are starting to show through, and they are worried about being discovered.
  • The softer sounds in "wagakoiwa" ("my love") and "omohtto" ("naturally tells") add a touch of vulnerability and tenderness to the poem. The speaker's feelings are genuine and deep, even though they are trying to hide them.
  • The final line, "Hito zo tohishikeri" ("finally people have asked"), has a strong ending with the "k" and "h" sounds, emphasizing the speaker's fear of exposure and the impact of their hidden love becoming public knowledge.

Tadami's Poem:

  • The contrast between the first two lines and the last two creates a sense of irony and disappointment. The speaker initially feels confident that their love is hidden, but then realizes that everyone knows anyway.
  • The "k" sounds in "koistyo" ("falling in love") and "Tachinikeri" ("notice") highlight the intensity of the speaker's feelings, while the softer sounds in "shirezukoso" ("nobody would notice") and "someshica" ("had believed") convey a sense of sadness and disillusionment.
  • The final line, "Omoi-someshica" ("had believed"), ends with a softer sound, emphasizing the speaker's heartbreak and the loss of their innocent belief that their love was a secret.

Overall Impression:

Both poems use sound effectively to convey the emotions of the speakers. Kanemori's poem uses a combination of soft and strong sounds to create a sense of tension and frustration, while Tadami's poem uses a contrast between confident and sad sounds to highlight the speaker's disappointment. Ultimately, which poem is "better" depends on your personal preference and how the sound choices resonate with you in the context of the meaning.

I hope this analysis helps you appreciate the poems on a deeper level!