Are sex toys a turn on? Do women enjoy experimenting with "props" in bed? And how do you bring UP the idea of bringing sex toys into the erotic equation in the first place? In this article we are going to take a quick and insightful look at what women like (or don't) when it comes to sexual accouterments in the sack! Curious to know more? Great... continue reading as we take a closer look below!
Okay... but aren't sex toys really only a turn on for men? I thought women only pretended to enjoy that stuff so HE would be happy?
The truth? Many women LOVE sex toys and have a large collection of their own that they enjoy both in private... AND with a partner! The simple truth is the days of a woman needing to feel embarrassed, ashamed or "easy" because she enjoys experimenting with passion props are thankfully, long gone. As a matter of fact, many women will gladly tell you the sorts of toys they like, they have... or even that they'd love for you to pick up as your relationship grows and the erotic experimentation expands!
Do all women feel the same way?
Absolutely not, no. Some women feel a social, or sexual stigma about using toys for gratification. Others feel a bit embarrassed, or have other objections as well. But in my experience, and this seems to be growing year after year, more and more women are actively enjoying these sorts of things in private... openly discuss them with our female friends, and as we grow more comfortable (or bold :-) with our partners, they are easy to integrate into a more adventurous sex life to boot!
Are there any particular toys that are best?
It really depends on the woman, AND on the man. For example, many smaller men are well suited to use different toys for HER sexual stimulation, than a more well endowed man would need. Or different women have different fetishes, or sensitive spots, or tastes across the board. So communication is key... and the type of body both HE and she have plays a pretty significant role in what sort of props are going to work BEST for both of you!
Why cuckolding is so popular a fantasy for men is a fascinating topic, and one it's worth understanding before you take even your first, tentative steps into the hot wife and cuckolding lifestyle.
First, it usually is men who harbor the fantasy, and more often than not it's their wish and desire -- and problem! -- getting their wives to agree to it. But when they do... oh my, there is so much fun to be had by both of you.
The first thing to understand is the Elf Bar cuckolding fantasy is not just arbitrary. Men feel this way for some very powerful and well-understood biological reasons.
We've evolved in a way that means our instinct is to behave in ways which ensure as much of our own DNA survives to the next generation as possible.
So consider this: when a man sees a woman making love to another man, he is filled with the urge to have sex with her also.
Why?
Because then there's a very good chance his sperm and not her previous partner's will impregnate her (this urge, along with the 'hunter killer' sperm in his semen, and the shape of his penis causing it to act as a semen-pump, sucking out the other man's sperm makes his behavior very effective -- which is exactly why it has evolved in the first place).
Now you know why a man's penis looks so funny and why he likes watching porn so much.
Anyway, to continue: now imagine how much more of a turn on this is when it's his partner who's having sex with another man. His time/energy investment in the relationship, plus the fact he may also already have children with her act to make the desire to make love to her afterwards even stronger.
The problem comes from the fact there are attendant emotions such as anger and jealousy competing with the sex urge.
And so cuckolding and the hot wife lifestyle tends to work best with those couples who are able to rise above these emotions, cope with them or otherwise limit their effects.
It's inevitable that at some point a man is going to get those hot lashes of fear, uncertainty and doubt, worrying about whether his wife is in love with this other man, or that he's better in bed, or... you get the picture.
Similarly, women can find their own feelings conflicted. Sometimes they feel guilt; sometimes they feel torn between both men; and sometimes they are even confused by what it might mean that they can experience wild, abandoned sex in front of their husband and yet then claim it means "nothing".
None of these emotions, nor the many others that can creep in, are necessarily bad; nor are they difficult to deal with so long as you learn to expect them and recognize the signs.
In our experience the secret to doing this successfully is a set of strong and inviolable ground-rules plus a policy of absolutely honest and open communication between you.
It's folly to pretend these emotions will never become manifest, so it makes sense to mitigate their effects with the those two strategies.
Is it worth it?
Well, each couple has to ask that question and answer it for themselves, but for me and my wife, Josselyn, the answer is a resounding YES!
For me, personally, there is nothing quite like the sharp thrill of watching my wife making love to another man, seeing him deep inside her and enjoying her pleasure vicariously. It also adds to the spice that I know she will soon let me make love to her, too, when he's gone (unless she's in a naughty, teasing mood, when she might make me wait for a few days).
And for her, she has the dual pleasure of another man as a lover, and the pleasure of knowing she's pleasing me, too.