You may be spending too much time in the Zone defensive state of mind that suggests you don always work and play well with others.
Everyone gets defensive it human nature. But when defensiveness reaches the boiling point in frequency and intensity, it can destroy relationships and damage personal and career success.
Defensiveness is your body way of keeping you comfortable. It blocks bad feelings though it doesn make them go away. In fact, the only way to make those feelings and defenses go away is to let them wash over you. Don respond right away; just feel. Then move on before you say something sarcastic, point a finger, or whine me. mechanisms are part of your personal history. From childhood on, they emerge as you learn to cope for better or for worse with stress. And when the going gets really tough, they take on a life http://www.eaglewoodfolk.com/festiva of their own becoming a suit of armor to you.
Who, me?
Think back to the last time you snapped at someone, withdrew into a deadly silence, or played the blame game. Yup, you were behaving defensively.
So the next time you tempted to do the defensive dance, notice and name the behavior you about to engage in. Admitting you cheap nfl jerseys have an issue with defensiveness is the first step to overcoming the problem.
Cueing into your feelings
The second step to defusing defensiveness is to cue in to your feelings and emotions before you snap. When your hackles go up, notice how your body responds physically: Your breathing quickens, your heart races, or you suddenly feel hot or cold.
What to do? When your hot buttons get pushed and you are poised to pounce hit instead. Then decide to use your head to deal with the matter.
Knowing your defenses cheap jerseys
Recognizing your knee jerk defenses can help you red flag them before damage is done. Check out the list below for a dozen of the most common defense mechanisms. Pause. Take a breath or even better take a walk. Deliberately slowing down your physical and emotional reactions is a sure fire way to defuse defensiveness.
Detach. cheap jerseys You know what pushes your hot buttons, so cut off your usual response at the pass. Instead of shooting a sarcastic comeback, ask a question. Instead of dumping, shut up and listen. And, instead of freezing up, open up and tell others how you feel.
Stop dissing yourself. Pessimistic thoughts can do this or look like an idiot make matters worse. Catch yourself when the self talk turns negative and consciously make it positive: can deal with this or can take care of myself. Positive thoughts really do lead to positive actions.