- The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 60 and over between 1950 and 2050 in three different countries.
- Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
- You should write at least 150 words.
From today, I am going to write English article as a practice of IELTs Writing test.
In this graph , All three countries have been improving proportion of the populataion aged 60 . In 1950, USA is the most high prportion,but at the point of 2010, USA was overtaken by Spain and also will be done in 2050 by korea. On the other hand, Korea has the latest proportion in that three countries in 1950. This rate had been almost no change until 2010. However, this contry has a big problem-declining birthrate.So , based on statisticial prediction, the proportion of over 60 will be about 4 times bigger than now.
添削後
In this graph, all three countries have shown an increase in the proportion of the population aged 60 and over.
In 1950, the USA had the highest proportion, but by 2010 it was overtaken by Spain, and it is expected to be overtaken by Korea by 2050.
On the other hand, Korea had the lowest proportion among the three countries in 1950, and this figure remained almost unchanged until 2010.
However, the country now faces a serious problem of a declining birthrate.
As a result, according to statistical predictions, the proportion of people aged over 60 will be about four times higher than it is now.
自分には時間がないことなんて分かりきってるのに、遊ぶことばかり考えてしまう。、、、今日も休日を無駄にしてしまった。