My own pace

I had so many things going on nowadays, so I have been always sad, worried, exausted, lonely, and etc. It was rare that I didn't cry at all a day. But I was fine today finally. I enjoyed being by myself and learning about an economist was fun. Since I dropped a very busy class, I feel like I have more time now. So I could read articles with my own pace. I think that the reason why I couldn't enjoy studying in this school so far is I was always rushed due to the lack of time caused by the quarter system and I was just memorizing things for exams. In today's reading, I could read several times until I understand the sentences. It takes a lot of time, but this is the best way. I do things slowly but this is my own pace. If I can't keep it, my mental state gets messed up. I won't care if some people don't understand me. I will try to keep this tempo.

I started to meditate. It helps me relax. I hope I can continue it. (*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆