いやごめんね、今日は久々に英語で行こうと思った。
急に気が転倒したからね。
一人で居たくないくせに一日家に出ない。。。
だから今日はちょっと英語にするね。
I think I've calmed down a bit now, but it's still
some what of a mess in my head. So I was watching
some anime (Ouran High School Host Club lmao) and
so when I was watching the 6th episode I just lost
it halfway through. It was probably when the were
playing tihs Mozart piece for 4 hands......(you
should know it if you've watched Nodame Cantabile,
it's the one Chiaki and Nodame plays in the beginning).
Well to be exact that's probably where I subconciously
started o break myself down. (for many reasons, one of
them being that I haven't been playing the piano for
2-3 months) and amidst all of this I thought that I
just might as well quit music....but thinking even
further I thought that I didn't have anything else I
could do so I started to panic. Later, I came to the
conclusion that I shouldn't stop....because I still
love it and it is still, in some sense a part of
me - even if I haven't found the strength to start
playing again.
Anyway so in the end of the 6th episode I shut it down,
because I couldn't watch until the end for some reason,
and put on some music. and these days I pretty much only
listen to 蜉蝣, the studs and 大佑と黒の隠者達...and that's
when I realized I shouldn't be moping around lmao.
From tomorrow on I'll try to do better somehow.
But right now I wish I were in Gotherburg, at Therese's place.
And that's all for me for the moment lol.
Sorry if all of this didn't make any sense.
Bye!