Well love has come back
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September 2003, I came to Kunming reading tests. Kunming weather seasons such as spring, where I started my thirst for knowledge, but also full of longing for love. I feel like an ugly duckling, usually did not look really seeing anyone, fearing someone else will beat you excited. I like a person sitting in the last row, like quietly listening to the teacher, the students sitting in front of me they often sound great, needless to say not hear my lectures. I'm thinking about how universities such psychological Yeah, feeling not as schoolboy. Psychological sulking when I initiate complaints, the next person looked up to stare at me, I feel like I share the same. Then I noticed a guy sitting next to me, in fact, look at 1 meter 75 tall. Suddenly a little like my face was on fire the same feeling, and my heart disorderly, so scared, is not that they will call me ah! But after a second, he suddenly smiled at me, did not speak, I feel he is not the kind of person it abhorrent. Slowly, he is very familiar with me. I knew his name, and I know he told me the same age.
In fact, I or someone liked it, I went to the school's computer room access, usually have two boys about me. I just do not believe that online dating feels so far away. I accidentally discovered that boys than me, it seems not tall. I told him not hostile, but I shouted into his sentence, a small P child. I knew I was outspoken, what words did not say out of the mental preparation.
I feel in my psychology just ordinary people, just want to have a love of the process. Of course, later I received his phone and began my mental surprised, and asked him who you are, he said, is my classmate. Later, I saw him give a message on QQ, I know he is my heart loved it. So we started the first date, two people walk together to the Lake, along the way, he would ask me thirsty, buy something to drink. He would care about people feeling good, a kind of sense of security. I told myself it is not because I did not at home, across the far, lonely hearts find accompany me to talk, play with. My dorm who knew my boyfriend who they want to see one of Kazakhstan, of course, I took him to the dorm so they can see it, the guard, knowing that he is the kind of person. They say he handsome! Then I feel a little bit proud of it. One time, I told him there are a few places to go with friends to sing K. He sang two songs at me, I have a little bit of listening to the lyrics touched it! In the eyes of others, I feel more like a friend like two lovers, perhaps. Because I've never been in love with whom Barbara's right! I was a kid just talking about it may have never been a true. This time, I tasted a kiss. On one occasion, feast, I told him two people went out to dinner, just buy a lot of fruit, there is my favorite, I never asked what he likes, but so I bought it, I just asked him, like it or not grapefruit? He said the next sweet to taste, then said, like to eat. I know he is very difficult to take care of people, people like to eat does not mean I like it, so whether you like it or not as long as I like it, would you like the same. We go to Internet cafes clubbing, sometimes a bubble on late. I will start into the cafe movie songs full game will not. He helped me to apply for a number, I can not remember, and always go there to die, I will not play bubblegum thing? He also said to me, Come on! I fire it off. I thought to myself that one day I will be more than you. Later, some students in the class overall with a very strange look at me, I'm squad leader said to me, you are the person I admire. Halo I do not know what to say, he did not know was I going to start like a. I'm tired, willing to sit together with my boyfriend. They always look at us. Slowly I would like to change the environment to leave this school, I told my boyfriend that I went to school it Normal Training College, the same is the Self, anyway, as long as the graduation on the line. He did not agree, but also firmly opposed, but he twisted, but me, I have decided to do anyway, would not have changed. Gradually I feel our distance or when the distant near. Sometimes he would come to me so I eat together. However, I moved out of the school and friends living in the same dormitory outside. He asked me how live school? I said: "do not want in the school, too noisy." I looked beside him to accompany an environment that can also be right. Did not oppose I live outside. Sometimes he came to me with the new students together for dinner, he did not make a phone call to me, just innocently I come back, I went to the 3:00 to go back, and he asked me how come so late ah not to eat. I only said, accompanied by learning to eat together also on the two-hour network. I was just playing with him to teach me to play the game, do not want to tell him, fearing that he knew. He did not eat it, I say go to dinner Well, he adamantly refused. Just to play with, ask me how I go to class, I said no class. Kazakhstan tired back rest. So he accompanied me upstairs, my two so very empty room in a sitting, I'm tired too sleepy sleepy, I fell asleep on the bed, he could only watch me sleep. Open my book and read quietly, in a daze. I woke up after the front he said: "go to dinner, time is 5:00." We went out to dinner.
Cold, and he always told me I'm always concerned about the clothes do not add more cold, and do not run around. But I always have to accompany my classmate turn. I know he Loved me, know that I have a lot of dirty clothes to wash he will not take the initiative to help me wash. Friends of places to eat hot pot sometimes suggested, I am going to buy food. I took him to go, he reluctantly accompanied me, but he do not say anything, I asked him how. He always said nothing. I bought a chicken. Then go home, sometimes I kind of illusion, how I feel like a pair of two married people to go shopping Yeah, my heart kind of very warm feeling. I'm talking to him until early soft boiled pork was delicious, he would be the sound grace. He took early chicken washed and washed, carried in front of me asked if I can cook it. I thought to myself, he is not to cook it? Then you cook it I want to taste your craft. He smiled and said okay, if you were my wife, then I'll cook for you to eat. That pot taste good, I Friends of places they went to buy vegetables, I buy meat.
I know, I told him slowly kind of dependency it! Feeling down on his arms as long as it is safe on a kind of a very comfortable feeling, sometimes we hold together in the window, and sometimes play cards together, and sometimes go shopping. Time really flies, flash is two years later. I moved back to the dorm, he called me and asked me if I did not bring a Thai skirt, I say bring it. This is my parents pick their own, and held him as if you can see him. I put things to him. One day he was drunk, but also asked me to accompany him, but I came back to school by car, I'm really tired, I fell asleep next to him, he just looked at me, looked at me a long time. I know there is something he would like to say to me, but he did not say. One day I called him, said to go to dinner, we went to eat hot pot, back on the road has been holding hands, talking and laughing along the way. When we went to the school door, there are two rows of seats, we sit together and hold, you said to me do not want to read anymore, homesick, so lonely in here, I said I'm there, I can accompany you to finish school , you say do not want to read and could not homesick, two days to go home. I might be anxious psychology. You ask me if I love you, I did not speak, I was so complicated, I do not know how to answer you, maybe I love you now, but I can not play revealed Come on, you know fear. I keep a straight face, that you just talk about the angry words. You are so in front of me disappeared.
Long time no contact, QQ I see you, tell you to ask hello hello bad? You say bad. Ask you why. You said nothing. I know you're on the phone. Back to school I naively thought you were in school, but I turned out to be long-distance call you, you tell me, my heart hurts, I never see you again. You asked me to go your house, I said okay. But I would like to test, I dragged you. Hours a day in the past six months later, you finally impatient, and said I kid you, I always say that you called is busy, one will get back to you, so I call you, you have to play cards with you colleagues. You begin to hate me.
Maybe love is unable to withstand the test of it, our love was lengthen the time, even now call you, you have not answered the phone, I know we have no results. Even once you said, you do not care bear me, but now it is gone, everything is gone. I know you're better than me. Also cared about me.
Sometimes, a man quietly alone, I always think of you, even if people told me, with me, I have not, because I was always only you. But you know I'm right Hello, you like me, only those who are now fragmented, I know myself fit, or why they do this to ourselves? I think I should do well for himself. Maybe I did not cherish you, maybe we really can not go back in the past, and now I graduated, although to get a diploma, but I think it is good empty! Did not you, maybe nothing at all the same. I think I owe it to yourself to find a way out of it, put you put yourself.
Kvoll
I think my biggest regret one thing in this life is to let you go, I think I could not find more than hello's. No one would care about me now. If you call me I hear you now we are not together for ever? A Man, I can only put your name in mind it.