HIM
In
the depths of my loneliness,
All I can see is all Your tests,
I think You didn't see what I did right,
And I thought that I'm always at your sight.
Yes, I have done things that are wrong,
But You have punished me for far too long,
I think that I could hardly live,
Maybe You're taking the life You give.
I could never be close to my father,
And I don't even had a lover,
People just don't appreciate me,
Coz that's the only thing that I can see.
Why am I different to others,
Why is it that everything is their's
Nothing left for me to cherish,
I should not be here, I wish.
I don't have the courage to go on,
I don't even dare to be alone,
But as my life goes along, It seems to me,
I should be on my own.
Knowing that my difference,
Is taking a different chance,
And realizing that I had a purpose too,
And I should be grateful to You!
All I can see is all Your tests,
I think You didn't see what I did right,
And I thought that I'm always at your sight.
Yes, I have done things that are wrong,
But You have punished me for far too long,
I think that I could hardly live,
Maybe You're taking the life You give.
I could never be close to my father,
And I don't even had a lover,
People just don't appreciate me,
Coz that's the only thing that I can see.
Why am I different to others,
Why is it that everything is their's
Nothing left for me to cherish,
I should not be here, I wish.
I don't have the courage to go on,
I don't even dare to be alone,
But as my life goes along, It seems to me,
I should be on my own.
Knowing that my difference,
Is taking a different chance,
And realizing that I had a purpose too,
And I should be grateful to You!
Here I go again (part 2) TT3TT
Today I will go to that dreaded place that I have been going for about 7 year now...(_ _。)
I have a very serious sore throat that was diagnosed to be severe tonsillitis. If the antibiotic which I hated so much (erythromycin) will not work I have to have tonsillectomy soon... Just what I need... Guess I'm gonna die young... (＞_＜)
Since I was a child, I was the sick one.. I was the only one out from 8 siblings who's in and out the hospital.. I'm one of the reason why we went bankrupt before. Demo when I reached high school I started to be exposed to different kinds of vices... It seems that my immunity gets stronger as I was exposed.. My asthma is not as severe as before..
Try living my life for just one day. You'll see how I am dependent on medicines just to keep me alive in full health. I just wanna stop.. meds are turning like SKITTLES...(´＿｀｡)
Right now I'm preparing for another check up demo this one I am positive... The doctor will try a natural based drug on me. If it works I will have to stop taking those synthetic drugs meaning SAYONARA side effects!!!
So wish me luck and hope that this work! (o^-')b
I have a very serious sore throat that was diagnosed to be severe tonsillitis. If the antibiotic which I hated so much (erythromycin) will not work I have to have tonsillectomy soon... Just what I need... Guess I'm gonna die young... (＞_＜)
Since I was a child, I was the sick one.. I was the only one out from 8 siblings who's in and out the hospital.. I'm one of the reason why we went bankrupt before. Demo when I reached high school I started to be exposed to different kinds of vices... It seems that my immunity gets stronger as I was exposed.. My asthma is not as severe as before..
Try living my life for just one day. You'll see how I am dependent on medicines just to keep me alive in full health. I just wanna stop.. meds are turning like SKITTLES...(´＿｀｡)
Right now I'm preparing for another check up demo this one I am positive... The doctor will try a natural based drug on me. If it works I will have to stop taking those synthetic drugs meaning SAYONARA side effects!!!
So wish me luck and hope that this work! (o^-')b
Life?
I just didn't know what made me thought of this... but have you ever ask yourself are you doing the things that your REALLY REALLY like to do??
Most of us work. Go the office, time in... prepare for your work.. then working your ass off until the time allotted to it.. eat lunch and work again.. go home... watch your favorite TV show... then talk to your friends online or via landline... Sleep then you'll gonna work again tomorrow...
Or some of us are just students, going to school, meeting with friends, studying in class, cheating with the test... going to the mall before going home, calling your friends before doing your homework, try to study even if you fail on concentrating... sleeping then going to school again...
Are you contented of what is happening to your life? doing the same things all over again.. yes you will make lots of money when working and yes you will have a high score on your test if you keep on studying... and then what? You can buy the things that you want or you can go to any university that you'll like or even work in a place that you really like.... and after a while what now?
marry and have a family... giving everything to your beloved? but didn't ever occur to you that you need something... not something as a material thing but something that can make you say I lived my life to the fullest.. it's not getting into clubs, drinking to your heart's content, having every boy you like, winning every contest or passing every exam.. just a simple thing that can happen to you... a very extraordinary thing that doesn't need any luck, skills or even knowledge... Something that you never imagine that will happen.. something that even I cannot describe in words.. All I know it's something that can make you say... "This is what you call life".....
Most of us work. Go the office, time in... prepare for your work.. then working your ass off until the time allotted to it.. eat lunch and work again.. go home... watch your favorite TV show... then talk to your friends online or via landline... Sleep then you'll gonna work again tomorrow...
Or some of us are just students, going to school, meeting with friends, studying in class, cheating with the test... going to the mall before going home, calling your friends before doing your homework, try to study even if you fail on concentrating... sleeping then going to school again...
Are you contented of what is happening to your life? doing the same things all over again.. yes you will make lots of money when working and yes you will have a high score on your test if you keep on studying... and then what? You can buy the things that you want or you can go to any university that you'll like or even work in a place that you really like.... and after a while what now?
marry and have a family... giving everything to your beloved? but didn't ever occur to you that you need something... not something as a material thing but something that can make you say I lived my life to the fullest.. it's not getting into clubs, drinking to your heart's content, having every boy you like, winning every contest or passing every exam.. just a simple thing that can happen to you... a very extraordinary thing that doesn't need any luck, skills or even knowledge... Something that you never imagine that will happen.. something that even I cannot describe in words.. All I know it's something that can make you say... "This is what you call life".....
The Good and the Bad
Ohisashiburi da na~~
Yeah it's been a while, I was busy with the Holy Week and I've been into some family outings too... so how was your easter??? Hope that you enjoyed it....
Ok I'll tell you the good news.. one of my new found friend here is having a baby......... And I am so happy... Omedatou.. kana-chan o(^▽^)o
Second is that my friend shinta already talked to his father and it all went well.. Yokatta na!!! (o^-')b
And lastly my two imoto are graduating this month.. well one already graduated while the other will be held on the 27th... so Omedatou atashi no Imoto!!!! :*:・(￣∀￣)・:*:
So those are the good news now going to the bad news...
First, my most hated cousin was there when we had our holy week at my parent's place... Damn I hated her so much I could kill her because of her arrogance... It's like she's high and mighty!!! She even made my other cousin cry coz of her bad comments towards her... I was waiting for her to say something bad at me demo I know that she's afraid coz If she does it I will definitely land a fist on her face... bwahahaha
(￣へ ￣ 凸
Then the last thing I heard that two of my most loved guys have a relationship already... It hurt me so much demo ne they are not mine from the start so I must let them go besides I wished for their happiness from the start.. so if their happiness are being with their new found love.. well my blessings are with them... I just hope I can move on fast (_ _。)
Yeah it's been a while, I was busy with the Holy Week and I've been into some family outings too... so how was your easter??? Hope that you enjoyed it....
Ok I'll tell you the good news.. one of my new found friend here is having a baby......... And I am so happy... Omedatou.. kana-chan o(^▽^)o
Second is that my friend shinta already talked to his father and it all went well.. Yokatta na!!! (o^-')b
And lastly my two imoto are graduating this month.. well one already graduated while the other will be held on the 27th... so Omedatou atashi no Imoto!!!! :*:・(￣∀￣)・:*:
So those are the good news now going to the bad news...
First, my most hated cousin was there when we had our holy week at my parent's place... Damn I hated her so much I could kill her because of her arrogance... It's like she's high and mighty!!! She even made my other cousin cry coz of her bad comments towards her... I was waiting for her to say something bad at me demo I know that she's afraid coz If she does it I will definitely land a fist on her face... bwahahaha
(￣へ ￣ 凸
Then the last thing I heard that two of my most loved guys have a relationship already... It hurt me so much demo ne they are not mine from the start so I must let them go besides I wished for their happiness from the start.. so if their happiness are being with their new found love.. well my blessings are with them... I just hope I can move on fast (_ _。)
I am so excited o(^▽^)o
It's been a week since we built a new forum... well it was started by me and my very supporting friend Shinta.. We had to work hard with it's promotion so we invited some old friends whom we thought that will enjoy the topic on our forum.. Luckily we gain around 30 members now most of them are from Indonesia (how I love the people there) and the rest from the Philippines and Germany... well the others I don't know hehehehe....
We are currently populating every threads that we made up.. posting a lot of info and hopefully we can make the forum big in time...Our major goal is to have around 100 members... so ganbarre masu!!!! (b^-゜)
One of the good news today we receive a confirmation message from the owner of the site on which we will get the info and they said that we can use all information coming from them.. just credit them at least... of course we will.. we love you guys that's why we are promoting you... hehehe ☆-( ^-ﾟ)v
There are still a lot of posting to be done.. I know it's a lot of work and we are not paid for this demo the enjoyment in making the forum is rewarding enough for me...
And if ever we hit the 100th member goal... we will soon launch our very own radio station.. I'm really getting excited with it... demo I still need a lot of programming stuff to deal with and hopefully we can do it on the day of that 100th member.. wish us luck guys... we really need it....＼(^_^)／
Sore de jaa~~ I'll keep you posted about the progress of our forum (*^-^)b
We are currently populating every threads that we made up.. posting a lot of info and hopefully we can make the forum big in time...Our major goal is to have around 100 members... so ganbarre masu!!!! (b^-゜)
One of the good news today we receive a confirmation message from the owner of the site on which we will get the info and they said that we can use all information coming from them.. just credit them at least... of course we will.. we love you guys that's why we are promoting you... hehehe ☆-( ^-ﾟ)v
There are still a lot of posting to be done.. I know it's a lot of work and we are not paid for this demo the enjoyment in making the forum is rewarding enough for me...
And if ever we hit the 100th member goal... we will soon launch our very own radio station.. I'm really getting excited with it... demo I still need a lot of programming stuff to deal with and hopefully we can do it on the day of that 100th member.. wish us luck guys... we really need it....＼(^_^)／
Sore de jaa~~ I'll keep you posted about the progress of our forum (*^-^)b