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The wall opposite him suddenly began to melt into transparency, opening into a deep, mysterious space of stars, planets, and far-distant galaxies. He watched in amazement as each planet and star began to dissolve, to disappear into a deepening blackness as if a storm of shadows, a pure nothingness, rumbled through space, swallowing up everything in its path.
Kamil was transfixed as the unfathomable black wave took over the horizon and seemed to be pressing against the room in which he, as an observer, could only wait. To his surprise, Kamil felt no panic, or even uneasiness. All of a sudden the room disappeared and he was now in absolute blackness. There was only a sound like wind blowing; rhythmic, from the lungs of a universe born before time. He felt an unknown intelligence was breathing over him—on him—through him. This breath was a force, a power that entrained Kamil to breathe in the same rhythm and pace as the breath that was upon him. He felt tiny and insignificant, yet was completely at peace as if he were curled inside a void that would nurture him unconditionally for all time.
He could sense every thought, feeling, hope, impression, image, everything that had been poured into his being over time—all lives he ever lived, or would live— were being purged and extracted from him. He was being emptied of all experience, all stimulation, all knowledge, all expression, all desire. Everything was taken from him as this vast, all-encompassing breath continued through him and around him. He was pure consciousness, separated from all that he believed he was.
I am dead.
The thought left him, his last particle of Existence's identity, like the final vapor of smoke from an extinguished fire rising into the sky's infinitude. He was the void. The breath was his, and he could only move as a particle of this enormous breath that seemed to fill the span of all things—created and eternal. He was breath within nothingness. There was no interchange. No energy. No need to balance, for duality was gone.
～The Dohrman Prophecy by James Mahu 「chapter51 The Blue Man」より～
ジェームズは手を変え品を変え、、、
自分の描く物語の中で、ある真実を表現しています。
言葉では到底説明することの出来ない「それ」を。。。
それを、登場人物の体験として、、、
何度も何度も。。。様々なシーンで、それを伝えようとしています。
時々、、、
自分はなんでこんなことをしているのだろう？と思ったりします。
ヒーラーとしてのお仕事の他に、夫の会社の仕事の手伝いまでして。。。
超多忙の中、どうしてこんなことをしているのだろう？と。。。
それでも、「何があっても絶対やめない！」と誓った、ウイングメーカー・マテリアルの
翻訳作業。。。
出来たとしても、一日、ほんの数行しか出来ない翻訳作業。。。
私がそれをやめないのは、、、
ジェームズの物語を読むと、安心するからです。。。
「あぁ、この人は絶対、経験したことがある人なのだろうな」と。。。
そう感じることが出来るからです。
そして、、、
同じ経験を「共有している」という感覚が胸に湧いてきて、、、
ホッとする。。。というか、、、すごく嬉しくなるのです。
私が、、、
「Nothing but Everything」とそう呼んでいるものを、、、
ジェームズもきっと、、、実際に体験した人なのだと思う。。。
カミルはそこで無意識に、、、
「愛」という言葉が出てきてしまったのだから。。。
Nothing but Everythingは、、、
「Nothing but Love」と言い換えることが出来ることを、、、
ジェームズもきっと、、、知っているのだろう。。。と。。。
そう思います。。。
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