Wow

Greetings to you all. Firstly, my deep and sincere apologies for not posting another blog sooner. As much I enjoy the act of blogging, with so much of This and ever more of That going on recently, I've barely had time even to wipe away my lathers of perspiration with a freshly microwaved hot towel.

First of all, I have a burning computer-related question for all of you faithful readers: is it possible to use a background that would essentially turn my computer monitor into a mirror? I tried scanning a mirror but it doesn't work. I'm not very computer-savvy, you see, so any advice would be greatly depreciated.

Oh, and by the way, I found That Place in Ueno you guys were asking me about. Under the tracks, third blue tarp on the left. Telephone me for details. Also, I think I know where the Governor of Tokyo parks his bicycle. Shall we sneak up there one night and let the air out of all his tyres? That would be funny, and maybe make him re-think his draconian laws against public dancing after mid-night. "Less studying, more dancing!" is my message to Japan's university students. After all, when was the last time you heard anything wonderful about the Japanese education system? My pal, an esteemed academic, says that most of their tests are useless and the results of which are just one more excuse for those who can't do anything useful to sit around and feel narcissistically satisfied about themselves. Unless of course, you are studying English (*cough* at LeafCup *cough cough*). If you can speak English, you can go anywhere! So, where would you like to go?

Now, I have another burning question: why do Japanese people consider green to be blue? I like Japanese people, but the "GO" symbol on a traffic light is green, not blue. Please make sure your friends understand this simple fact.

Well, before you know it, Summer Vacation time will be back! So, does anyone have any travel plans? I'm planning to go to Hawaii, where I can enjoy surfing and Hula Dancing without having to speak English. After that, I'll probably head down to Shizuoka and grapple with Mount Fuji. Mind you, after the hole in my wallet those American Dollars will likely burn, it looks like my immediate diet back on Japanese soil will be limited to the occasional bag of Freedom Fries, and whatever leftovers the ghouls in Aokigahara forest can spare.

Anyway, it's already 1am. I'd better go to bed if I want to get up in time to watch Saturday Disney at 6:30.

By the way, have you heard about the best English Conversation Café in Tokyo? If not, check it out!

http://leafcup.com/index.htm  

http://www.leafschool.com/  

Kind Regards,

J.

SPRING HAS SPRUNG...

Greetings and salutations to you all. Firstly, a belated thanks to the 2 and a half people who read my last blog. Your half-hearted support of my rambling textual banalities is both rewarding and deeply inspiring.

Today, I went to visit a monkey park. Apparently, it’s one of the largest and most popular monkey parks in Japan, you know? However, it wasn’t the mischievous macaques which are the subject of my blog today, rather a flattering comment to my friend about his appearance made by a passing local man.

Admittedly, with Hollywood good looks, long flowing locks and a powerful beard, it is not unfathomable that my friend could be considered an Attractive Man. Yet, such a comment made by another man – who was accompanied by his girlfriend no less – asks even more questions than it does answers. I can assure you, however, I certainly didn't jump to any forgone conclusions regarding the commentator’s sexuality, and we thus afforded him the benefit of the doubt.

For the record, though, while I consider anti-homosexual sentiment and commentary deplorable, I do not agree that the discrimination of the Likers of Their Own Equipment have suffered to be as systematic as that of Native Americans (although I certainly sympathise with the argument that the need to conceal one's nature can exact a terrible toll).

Indeed, one thorny issue I find hard to discuss with any but the most reasonable is the fact that vast majority of homophobic behavior constitutes prejudice and bigotry, but not discrimination, despite the hysterics of the intolerant of intolerance propaganda (with which I agree in spirit but not in practice). Native Amercians, on the other hand, were historically treated as less than fully human, which is one reason why I refuse to support the Washingston Redskins, an American Football team that obviously condones offensive racial slurs against my adopted peoples. Having had social intercourse with Japanese, Brazilian, and Puerto Rican women in the past few months, a color-blind Man of the World simply cannot pander to such bigots.

So, has anyone heard about that English Conversation Café in Tokyo? If not, check it out!

http://leafcup.com/index.htm

http://www.leafschool.com/

Kind Regards,

J.

EXCITING ANECDOTES !!!

Hi everyone! Long time no Ameblog. Unfortunately, I've been quite exhausted of late after purchasing the entire "Billy's Boot Camp" anthology and working out to it vigorously. Trust me, I've been working up quite a sweat by putting on the DVD and gyrating spastically in my bedroom. Mind you, as every female in Japan also owns the entire collection, I feel as if the embarrassing arm twirls, torso twists, pelvic thrusts and gluteal flexes must be of some physical and spiritual benefit.

My "get fit quick" regimen doesn't stop there, which is why I've recently subscribed to the "Banana Diet." That's right, break your fast with a banana every morning and watch those unsightly kilograms simply disappear. Sounds too good to be true? Sure, and admittedly, I was slightly skeptical until a close female friend of mine gushed about how she had lost 200 grams in a single day… just by following the Banana Diet Method. When I suggested that this small drop in weight was probably because she weighed herself after taking a piss, she bought out the Fact Book. Read: as a mildly popular TV tarento endorsed it, obviously the Banana Diet is 100% effective.

Speaking of my friend, we went to see the new hit movie "Avatar" recently. Watching the film was thoroughly enjoyable, however the experience was somewhat soured when my friend missed a boob when she went to the washroom to powder her nose. When she sat back down, the monstrostratastic mammary popped right out of her dress top. Talk about a social faux pas. All became well, though, when her friends had a big laugh, copped a feel, and put it back in place. She is single incidentally, so I'm thinking about introducing her to my male pianist friend whom I told you about last time. Before doing so, I guess I will advise him that a pianist should probably pursue proper practices and pecuniary profit without plunging into a perilous peregrination of perfidy and peril, so to please proceed with prudence.

By the way, have you heard about the best English Conversation Café in Tokyo? If not, check it out!

http://leafcup.com/index.htm

http://www.leafschool.com/

Kind Regards,

J.