かる：What's with the condoms?
ぎゃ：Calm down, they're not for you.
かる：Just what every man wants to hear from his wife. So?
ぎゃ：Okay, hear me out. You know how Ana is dating Danny Bolen?
かる：I'm going to kill him.
ぎゃ：And we have to be realistic.
かる：With my bare hands.
ぎゃ：Because they're not going to listen to reason.
かる：And bury him under the porch.
ぎゃ：No! Carlos, what choice do we have?
They're two teenagers who are getting seriously involved.
Isn't it better to be safe than sorry?
かる：But giving them these is like giving them our blessing.
ぎゃ：And that's how I felt at first, but like Angie said,
nature's going to take its course.
かる：Yeah, easy for her to say. She's got the boy.
What if the condom breaks? What if he forgets to put it on?
If he knocks Ana up, who do you think's
gonna end up raising the kid?
ぎゃ：God, that would be awful. Getting up for those 3:00 a.m.
feedings after you've worked all day.
かる：Not me, you! You'll end up taking care of the baby.
So you better convince her to keep her legs crossed
until she's out of this house.
ぎゃ：Wait, how is this my problem? She's your trampy niece.
かる：Because if she gets pregnant, I'll be in prison for killing
what's buried underneath the porch.
りね：What? Liar! You said you've seen seals playing
horns that put on a better show.
かう：There's no need to bully him into agreeing with you.
りね：I wouldn't have to bully him if he would man up for noce.
かう：Lynette, you're attacking.
りね：Of course. Because I'm always the bad cop,
he's always the good cop.
Could you just once not be such a wuss?
とむ：Damn right, I'm the good cop. Someone has to be.
Because bad cop/bad cop doesn't work.
I grew up in that house, and it doesn't work.
りね：That is not it. You like me being the bad guy.
That way you can always be the good guy.
But guess what? I'd love to be the good guy
once in a while, but I can't. Because when things get hard
or a difficult decision has to get made,
you run from confrontation. And if I don't step into the
void, things grind to a halt, because I've got news for you,
good cop/goodcop doesn't work, either.
とむ：You're right.
りね：Really?
とむ：I liked to be liked. And because of that,
a lop of the ugly stuff I defer to you. And I'm sorry.