I like to think of myself as a P O W E R F U L and E M P O W E R I N G ~ bisexual~ woman 
Me looking at other woman: "WOW SHE IS SO BEAUTIFUL AND SMART AND BRAVE AND PERFECT 
"
Me looking at my female best friends: "Go bitch, go bitch, go bestie!" *quoted from Bestie by Bhad Bhabie*
I was feeling very comfortable 
in my own bisexual/female-empowering self until I was pondering upon my type of girls/boys that I get attracted to.
My 
type
Boys: nerdy (LOL) & good sense of humour
Girls: fit, dark-skinned light-eyes, beautiful face
Me: 
I noticed how my type of boys were based on personality traits, whereas my type of girls were based simply by their physical features. 
It kind of left me feeling a little upset 
and it made me think about the society we live in where women are constantly pressured to look pretty.
- women are expected to wear makeup to work 
- women are expected to have polished nails, taimed hair, smell good at all times
- women are expected to wear skirts and high heels in formal situations to "look pretty" though they may be uncomfortable to have on
As a feminist, I like to think that I completelyyyyy disagree with these societal expectations and that they do not affect me in the slighest bit 
but in reality... they really do.
I feel ugly when my hair isn't "perfect", when my outfit doesn't feel right, when my makeup gets smudged up, when my acne gets worse, when I feel like I've gained weight, aaaaaaand the list goes on.
Although all humans (not just women!) are bound to feel pressured to look good, the pressure put on women to look pretty at all times is inexhaustible. We are subjected to feel unworthy when we are not meeting the bare minimum level of looking "presentable" for other people.
And even though it is hard for me to admit, I think that I have internalised this misogynistic view that women have to be pretty in order to be worthy and attractive.
I noticed my interanlised misogyny through my bisexuality.
However, I also realise that internalised misogyny is unavoidable when living in a patriarchal society. 
So I decided to give myself a break 
since I have accomplished the first step of acknowledging the misogynistic views I have been projecting towards myself and others. 
The next step is to FUCKING OWN MY GENDER AND BEAUTY and truly become the powerful and empowering bisexual woman that I aspire to be 
