Being Me

It's hard to find what it means to "be me" now when I have so many more responsibilities.  Being a wife and mom are full time jobs though I am very grateful for all the help I receive from my husband. 

Another big change is that I was recently laid off.  I had two months warning and one month severance.  I am fortunate that my income is not needed to pay the bills, but I still feel antsy all the same without steady income.  Not working is so weird though, when I've been working since I was 16.  Hopefully better things come about, but nothing beats the flexibility of not working haha. And I can finally tap into my feminine energy and be more domesticated.... dreams. 

2025

It's been a long time! But so many changes have occured in the last few years. I'm married and I have a kid now! Motherhood has been a steep learning curve. I try to be patient but it sure is hard..

It's been a while

Hi blog!  

Still alive here.  

I last blogged about the proposal.  We officially tied the knot last summer, and married life is nothing short of marital bliss. 

Just kidding. 

Married life was soooo rough in the beginning.  Moving in together was the toughest part.  Living with another human being is just... hard.  Especially when that other person moved their entire household's worth of crap stuff into yours.  I am thankful I have the space to accommodate a lot of his belongings, but my third stall garage is all clogged up now. If we were to move again, we definitely need to sell/give away a lot of things.  

On the other hand, we've done a tremendous amount of traveling since I've known the man.  Washington DC, Maryland, Puerto Rico, Grenada, Trinidad & Tobago, Italy, France... I'm probably even missing some.  But I've especially loved my international trips to Europe!  Europe = shopping.  I've cultivated quite a luxury handbag collection over the past year.  My husband surprisingly supports me.  I am a lucky woman. 

Anyway. Live, Laugh, Love.   

Engaged

“He sweeps her hair back from her ears; he swings her above his head. He says he will never leave her, not in a million years.”

-Anthony Doerr, All the Lights We Cannot See

And with this quote on the card, D came around the table and proposed to me.  "Will you be my forever Boo?"

Of course I said yes! 

It's actually strange to know that I'm engaged now.  It's just always been a milestone that I've seen others post on FB... 

I am infinitely happy and grateful with D.  We are very compatible and I love that I can be my silly self around him.  He revealed that he knew I was "the one" since about 2-3 months into the relationship.  I know we started talking about the future at that point, but I do that with every one of my exes... as we've established, women tend to plan way ahead in a relationship.  Without the committment from the man.

I feel very lucky to be where I am at.  I finished my doctoral degree and will be starting a new job soon.  I'm newly engaged.  Things are going so well and I feel very stable in my mood.

Looking back, K and I were completely toxic.  More than once did I fear for my safety by his reckless driving when he was angry.  He contacted me today about some flight credits.  Not going to lie - I was shaken up a bit when I saw his name.  No, I am not in love with him, but his name did evoke some memories - some great, some not so great.  I still remember the time he changed a flat tire on the side of the highway in Nevada.  Or when we completed our dozen walks to the city square from our hotel by memory in Boston.  I was really in love with him back then and cherished those moments.  Thank you for those experiences, and showing me "what could be." 

If one day we happen across each other through mutual friends, I hope I can say a "Hi, how are you?"

High Value Man

I've been watching a lot of red pill videos lately. Happy to say I am now dating a "high value man"

K is long gone... Thank God.