been in HK and landed this morning and v mixed yay✨
Mum came last month and went to places
walked Puzzle and I miss her😢
and only realised I missed my deadline earlier(:
just let me off for reading week ok😂
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I have too much pride to tell people I failed my test today, female engineer and all that crap
honestly I just need a break and I can't let myself go
deadlines Friday Sunday Monday Tuesday and Wednesday with CG and Newcastle and everything going on at the same time but it's okay because life goes on and I am not doing this on my own. God is always with me✨
gotta get out for work dinner tonight and I just want to stay in and never face anyone again
nope
deadlines deadlines deadlines yay
Idk what I am doing but I guess I will figure out half way through the report and actually understand things for once
It’s normal to not understand everything at uni right
Idk why I am doing engineering
Im not clever or anything
Like maths is pretty much the only thing I can do
And idk why but recently been so overwhelmed with hillsong being so big
So intimidated with everyone like how do people even know people like I am so tired talking to people all the time already what am I even doing
Idk im so done Sundays are even dalkdjalsdskfhdf
Baptism?
I’ll give it another 38434932314893458years
There we go
I wish I could do something to glorify God
Just something ugh idk
Are coffee catch ups even worth it
Like I am so lost I don’t want to face anything
And Matt comes into mind when I least want him there
Really not worth my time are people
Stay weird x
really dislike halloween
so many youtube vids are about halloween
think Pan filmed one to upload xdd
just came back from freshers camp 2016
it's quite cool to be one of the organisers although all i did was just organise the worship
so we had check point yesterday and there was this 'fast pass' to skip all the check points and to do that group members had to get on this wood which floats on the algae on this mysterious pond
and the string kind of broke and Sophie Rinne screamed HAHA
like Cindy kept saying we really cant get the fast pass unless everyone get on the boat thing
and Ivan came over to have a look and he nearly fell into the pond:E(again) tho he only twisted his ankle or sth
campfire was indoor, people weren't really high enough i dont think but i love worship and music💚
Jo led it :p
talked to Ivan and gonna pray for his ankle and that
didnt realised we really take things for granted, like a perfectly healthy body and a job and an offer from uni
oh what are we without God, just want to praise the Lord with all I have
can't even remembered the last time I blogged:p
been a decent week
worked Mon and Tues
Royal Albert Hall on Mon was so good💚
Friday korean dinner with Hermia
althought cos Juliane didn't know the time, we got out late and had to run there:L
and Tues she asked if she could use my bedroom for her party cos shes going back to Germany
:L
met Matt in the evening😍
watched Finding Dory and went for food(he paid and said I'm broke anyway)
and walked me home💚
Abbey lunch at Zizzis Shepherd's Bush
she paid with my student discount hahahhaa
had a trial bass lesson with Valentina and shes so goodddd☺️💚
Thurs coffee with Megan and finally getting Beemo back😭💚✨
and another trial with Elena
and drinks in central with JB:p
so good to see him and he bought me drinks and chips hahahhaaaaa
catching up and that, 💚
when he doesnt text you but you dont wanna text him and you dont know what you can do🙄
maybe things are already over for us🙄
Sunday!
(elaine gets on my nerve so much omglob)
The sound of Horn
ShaTin City Hall Cultural Activities Hall
it was pretty good Hermann Paw is first horn at Sinfonietta xdd
but the acoustic is pretty bad tho:L
jo jit for mid autumn
AH PO💚
home and Sam being rude to mum again, only if there's something I could do about it......
came back yesterday
even that lake walk
like I dont want to feel but I also dont want to be a mess and conceal everything
I wanted someone but didn't realise maybe I'm not ready yet
hillsongconf day2
been so quick
since leaving work on the day they got bacon rolls
went to Germany for Triorca 
please bring me back right now
honestly missing this sunset and the place and the people
I have this constant fear that no ones gonna care about me and no ones gonna love me and no ones ever gonna be loyal to me
because I am a boring person?
because I dont talk much?
'come expectant'
housepower ago had a theme of 'Next Level'
I want to be the next spiritual level
I just want to be somewhere else I guess
so yesterday for the opener rehearsal
I was so tired I mistaken everyone for people from Triorca
I miss them when I didn't even know them that well
but I just really wanted to play music in a proper youth orchestra 
I don't want to feel but maybe he just doesnt use whatsapp and I dont want diatractions I just want to encounter Jesus
Sat went to Histro's it was so far I nearly died
another polaroid wasted like I dont want to trust anyone with it anymore
thing is I dont want to be overreacting and all that but I only get mad over cameras and photos
practices a bit and this is as good as it gets(music stand wise)
and I miss this thinf so much:L
Sunday preach was good(: wasnt meant to be on but a lot of people wasnt there so ended up vision mixing for 1:15 :p
at least got my conference tic sorted yay
like I'm not even kidding but this is what the sky looks like every evening, kinda want summer to stay now:3
the station was busy today
got what I needed from paperchase and posted my thoughtd out to Rachael
found some hidden restaurants bars on the way home
had House Power at St. George's Holborn
'Next Level'
sainsburys(again) with Shreya
carrying pads on public transport like its no big deal
went to Ivan's at Kingston
Dough balls were sooooo soooo good💚💚
accidentally saw Tommy at Waterloo and lightbulbed for the bit of the journey:p
cos he was going with Louisa
oh wells the rest of some cyf got on the train at Wimbledon
Dough balls were sooooo soooo good💚💚
headed home whilst everyone else went the other way
possibly to go for Korean food
I guess I just really needed time to be alone, desperately
kitchen sink clogged
idk what I can do._.