I’ve never thought so deeply about work. Of course I don’t want to one of those people who are constantly waiting for the weekend and hate their job. My philosophy was that if it was something that I enjoyed and I didn’t hate waking up in the morning to go to, I didn’t care about the money or the type of work.
I’ve been thinking a little more about it recently. Thinking about my skills and what I can do and offer to a company. What I wanted to do was gain experience in lots of different areas, and then finally settle in something that works.
I stayed in teaching for a long time. It fit me and I was good at it. I enjoyed it. However I probably stayed too long. I got to the point where it was taxing to go to work. I didn’t have any enthusiasm or motivation. But I was too scared to leave. I didn’t know what I could or should do next.
Somehow I stumbled into the job I’m doing now. After a chance encounter on a plane, I started working in a cafe while occasionally teaching, translating, and sometimes traveling and interpreting. I have always had an interest in food and secretly one of my plans from a while ago was to open my own cafe somewhere in Tokyo. Now I have a bit of liberty to decide how the cafe is run, and it’s something I enjoy doing. Still I don’t know if it’s quite what I should be doing.
Should is a difficult word though. I hardly think we should be doing anything. It’s about desire and whim, and sometimes we do things simply because they are enjoyable. On the other hand, I would like to think more about what comes next. I’ve had an interest in traveling and tourism, and I think naturally that could be my next move. How I can make that work I’m not sure, but I think it’s something I can be good at. I need each day to be a little different while still having the security of a routine.
Sometimes I feel I’ve been a little irresponsible and I’ve just allowed myself to go with the flow and avoided being proactive and deciding for myself. I think it’s time for me to be a little more assertive and productive in what comes next.