grief is weird.
i never expected it to be so complicated.
i piece together our memories.
immediately after i heard that you died, i started typing out your quirks and our memories into my notes app on my phone.
im scared of forgetting you. i feel like im forgetting you already.
i go out if im invited, but i havent felt like going out lately.
im functioning in front of people, while im struggling to process your death.
im going through the motions of life. i see people living their life while im at a full stop.
im laughing, im making jokes when im out. once im home, i cry and cry and cry.
how do i move forward?
when will i feel better?
i miss you terribly.
i miss hugging you, holding your hands, kissing you, laughing about the stupidest shit, eating foods together, seeing you on my laptop screen 24/7, fighting with you, and complaining about life to you.
how do i move forward?
how do i move forward?
how do i move forward?
i miss you.
i love you.
i think about what i would do if i got to see you again.
id probably cry, but i will hold you. i will tell you that its okay and everything is okay.
i miss you.
i love you.