I know, it has been a long time I don't have written in there.
But, I just can't spit my feelings into words, right now.
And nobodyread them, right?
I'm just drained.
"Not again, not again, not again, this dream I can't awake
What is real, what is real, what is real, it's getting hard for me to take What I need, what I need, what I need, a little somethin' I rely
And the white sugar gently hides me..."
I didn't said you the last news in my poor piece of life.
On the May, 7th, I went to Paris for the Tokyo Decadance. It's related to my "Boo boo boo" entry. I dance during all the night with my best and her friends. It was really a good evening! I also saw a man who look like Vivian (Lovex). ....some obsessions maybe?
After Paris, I went one good week to Lyon, to see my other best, "Chaton" ヽ(ﾟ◇ﾟ )ﾉ (This is one of the expression I can have on my face when I'm wit her XD). We spend a lot of time watching movies, playing playstation 3 (Silent Hill 2, Resident Evil 5...) and other stuffs like that. Kind of real holidays, I like this! Love you, Chaton!
Right now, I'm in Bordeaux, in my boyfriend's room. I've done all the things I wanted this month. I saw Kits two days before, and we've eaten together. Last time I saw her was when I was here to get the psycho, for my job.
By the way, I'm still working for them. I'm beginning my second year. Well, time goes fast! And, I've found an appartment, too. I will be in on July, 1st!
Otherwise... what to say? I don't really know where I am in my feelings. Well, that's not really true... I know where I am, and it's frightenning me. I don't know how to explain it... He doesn't feel anything for me, and I'm certainly waiting for more, somewhere in my cold heart. But, when I'm with him, I just feel this heat, deeply in my chest, and nothing else matters...
So, I'm right there, and I'm lost. Am I good enough to be loved...?
"How muchmore
your tiredheart can take?
The time will show
that our secrets won´t be safe..
I won't let go of things that I was dreaming
I won't let go of you, you keep me believing
and deep in my heart there's a place that I could never show to you
I won't let go of you, my dear..."
I'm wondering...
I really really love this anime : Ergo Proxy. If I go to Japan Expo this year, I'm wondering if I can do the cosplay of Re-l Mayer.
Yeah, I know, I'm not as thin as her, but....
I'm not indentify myself as Re-l Mayer. In fact, I'm more like the Proxy. But I can't cosplay him. That's too bad!
Tell me what you're thinking about that, please.
"Please could you stop the noise, I'm trying to get some rest
From all the unborn chicken voices in my head
What's that...?
What's that...?
[...]
You don't remember
You don't remember Why don't you remember my name?
Off with his head, man
Off with his head, man Why don't you remember my name?
I guess he does...."
