24.There's one word to desctibe what's happening and that word is "panic."
25.And of course this comes with unthinkable irrational behavior.
26.The crash of '29, 1987's Black Monday, came with tragic suicides and murders.
This collapse is no exception.
27.Just one hour ago, as the makets were opening, two partners at Capt Villiers Holdings were
shot at the troubled company's headquarters.
28.Senior partner Laura Maller died on site.
29.Analyst Albert Berned is in critical condition.
30.Jefferey Desange, also senior partner, was in the office at the time of the shooting and has
now gone missing.
31.Do you think that's because her famly changed their name from
Albrecht?
32.or do you think it's because all BU girls are bitches?
33.From the record, she may look like a 34C, but she's getting all kinds of
help from out friends at Victoria's Secret. She's a 34B, as in barely
anything there.
34.False advertising.
35.The truth is, she has a nice face.
36.I need to do somehting to take my mind off her.
37.Easy enough, except I need an idea.
38.I'm a little intoxicated, I'm not gonna lie.
39.So what if it's not even 10:00 p.m. and it's a Tuesday night?
40.The Kirkland facebook is open on my desktpop,
41.and some of these people have pretty horrendous facebook pics.
42.Billy olson's sitting here and had the idea of putting some of the pictures
of farm animals and have people vote on who's hotter.
43.I'm not gonna do the farm animals, but I like the idea of comparing two
people together.
44.It gives the whole thing a very "Turing" feel since people's ratings of the
pictures will be more implicit than, say, choosing a number to represent
each other person's hotness, like they do on hotornot.com.
45. The first thnig we're going to need is a lot of pictures. Unfortunately,
Harvard doesn't keep a public centralized facebook
46.I'm going to get all the images from the individual houses that people are
in
47.Let the hacking begin
48.First up is Kirkland. They keep everything open and allow indexes in
their Apache configulation.
49.So a little Wget magic is all that's necessary to download the entire
Kirkland facebook.
50.Kid's stuff.
51.Next is Eliot. They're also open,
52.but with no indexes on Apache.
53.I can run an empty search and it returns all of the images in the datebase
in a single page. And I can save the page and Mozilla will save all the images
for me.
54.Excellent. Moving right along.
55.You are at one of the pldest, one of the most exclusive clubs, not just
Harvard, but in the world.
56.And I want to welcome you all to Phoenix Clubs first party of the fall
semester!
57.Lowell has some security. They require a user name/password combo,
58.and I'm gonna go ahead and say they don't have access to the main FAS
user datebase, so they have no way of detecting an intrusion.
59.Adams has no security, but limits the number of results to 20 a page.
60.All I need to do is break out the same script I used on Lowell and we're
set.
61.Quincy has no online facebook.
62.Dunster is intense. Not only is there no public directly, but there's no
directly at all. You have to do searches, and if your search returns more
than 20 matches, nothing gets returned. And once you do get results,
they don't link directly to the images. They link to a PHP that redirects or
something.
63.This may be difficult. I'll come back later.
64.Leverett is a little better. They still make you search, but you can do an
empty search and get liknks to pages with every student's picture.
65.It's slightly obnoxious that they only let you view one picture at a time.
66.and there's no way I'm going to go to 500 pages to download pics one
at a time.
67.So it's definitely necessary to break out Emacs and modify that Perl
script.
68.Perfect timing. Eduardo's here and he's going to have the key ingredient.
69.I need the algorithm you use to wank chess players.
70.We're ranking girls.
71.Give each girls a base rating of 1400.
72.At any given time Girl A has a rating R-a and Girl B has a rating R-b.
73.When any two girls are matched up, there's an expectation of which will
win based on their current rating, right?
74.And those expectations are expressed this way.
75.Just a couple of people. The question is, who are they gonna send it to?
76.He blogged about you. You don't wanna read it.
77.Is this yours? I stole it from a tranny.
78.Man, that's an awful lot of traffic.
79.You think maybe we shouldn't shut it down before we get into trouble?
80.Well, there's a very unusual amount of traffic to the switch at Kirkland.
81.You're saying it's unusual for 4:00 in the morning?
82.No, this'd be unusual for halftime at the Super Bowl.
83.Harvard's network is about to crash.
84.Unless it's a coincidence, I think this is us.
85.So you were called in front of the Ad Board.
86.She said all that?
87.I was reading from the transcript of her deposition.
88.You think if I know she can make me look like a jerk, I'll be ,more likely
to settle.
89.Why don't we stretch our legs for a minute?
90.It's been almost three hours.
91.And frankly, you did spend an awful lot of time embarrassing Mr. Zuckerberg with the girl's testimony from the bar.
92.I'm not embarrassed, she just made a lot of that up.
93.Then I guess that would be the first time somebody's lied under oath.
94.The site got 2,200 hits within two hours?
95.Is there any way to make this a fair fight?
96.Well, you could row forward and I could row backward.
97.We're genetically identical. Science says we'd stay in one place.
98.Two nights ago, a sophomore choked the network from a laptop at Kirkland.
99.He set up a website where you vote on the hotness of female undergrads.