J for "Just Moved!"

I should write about "Japan" for J, but I won't...

I have moved my house. I feel MUCH better now. The previous place was not bad, but I didn't like how I could hear everything from the next door, and how dirty the kitchen was. After 5 months, I didn't really understand the landlady and didn't like how unnecessarily sensitive she was. She wasn't a bad person and the place wasn't a nasty place, but just I like my current place much better.

Basically, only two people are cooking (and the landlady is not living in the same floor as the kitchen and living room), so I can use the kitchen for a long time. I've wanted to cook more since I decided to move out. Now, my experimental cooking will start!

One of my classes is going well, but the other is not. Yesterday, the manager suddenly came into my class without notice to observe me. I knew that was because some of my students complained about what I did in the class, and many of them have left. Since there's no curriculum, I'm not really sure what to do. After the class, the manager called me in her office and gave me very good ideas and advice. I was relieved since I thought she didn't trust me at all now and was going to change the instructor. But she still gave me a chance. I have to make it work on next Tuesday.

I for "Improvement"

I'm not sure if I should call these "improvement", but I'm working on something new.

First, I've been doing yoga almost everyday for over a week. I'm too intimidated to join the class, so I borrowed a DVD from a library. But I quite like it. I always wanted to try yoga but was just dreaming of it. Now, even I'm doing very simple movements for only 10 minutes, I feel like I'm doing something good for me. At the same time, I'm trying to wake up early even when I don't have to work in the morning. This is just an instinct, but I suddenly thought getting up early makes me feel better. Well, it does. These days, I don't have trouble sleeping and don't miserable, which I always do when I get up around noon. I used to sleep at around 11 although I worked at night. I'm trying to get back to my good old habit.

Second, I started a singing class on Saturday. It is held by Vancouver School Board and 8 classes in total. I wanted to learn singing for one thing, and I also wanted to know how to project my voice efficiently in the class. I have to speak loud on the job and tend to hurt my throat. I hope this class will make my voice stronger and make me feel good about talking in public.

I had strange dreams last night and I keep thinking about them. They were not at all pleasant, so I hope I'll get rid of them from my brain pretty soon.

My moving day is approaching. My room is now full of boxes. I feel a little unsettled because I have to move on a week day and I'll have to work at night on the same day. I can't wait to be away from my sharemate next door!

H for "Homemade Dinner"

Yesterday, I was invited by one of my Japanese friends for dinner. She is a good cook and made me tonjiru and takikomi gohan, which are miso soup with pork and various vegetables and rice cooked with mushrooms and gobo. I don't cook miso soup at home, so it was very nice to have an authentic Japanese meal. I like cooking, but I'm not too motivated to do a big cooking in the kitchen in my place since my landlady also uses the kitchen often. AND it's dirty.... After I moved in to the new place, I hope I can cook more just like I did before.

This weekend was full of fun. I met somebody every day. Yesterday's one was totally umplanned. Nice surprise. I met my Japanese friends 4 days in a row, so I'm now worried if I will be able to speak fluently tomorrow!

I'm such a bad, BAD procrastinator. I haven't even started to plan tomorrow's class.... And I'm going to start a new class on Tuesday. I will, I will start right away!

G for "Getting Started"

OK, I have officially started working. So far, I have taught two night classes, and they were both good. I still haven't used to the office environment and night-time shift, but it'll be easier as time goes by...

Yesterday, I attended the meeting at the other office. (I'm working at two different offices of related institution.) The first half of the meeting was a lecture by a guest speaker, which was tedious (sorry). I was awed by people who were delivering great opinions after the long, boring talk....

The latter half was a smaller meeting with other teachers and office staff. I'm going to be in charge of a intermediate conversation. I once subbed the similar class as a volunteer before, but now they decided to charge students more and use a paid instructors. I got 6 topics to cover. Since I can spend only 4 classes on one topic, I have to be very efficient, but I'm excited to teach this class. The curriculum is supposed to be all about "functional language" so that the students can use what they learn in the class immediately in their daily life. I need that language too!! After I finish this session in December, I will have been able to talk more colloquially! (hopefully)

F for "Future"

I'm feeling tired all weekend. My friend told me that is because I haven't got over the fatigue from the trip. Maybe it's true. But I should have had enough rest. I started my new job, but again, I'm lacking vitality. I felt the same feeling when I was teaching higher level last year. I knew I had to consider myself very lucky to be given the opportunity, but my body and soul didn't follow what I understood.

But now, I realized that I must stop running away. I found that I still wishing to have a non-teaching job because I would be able to be a "good English speaker" in that environment. As long as I teach, I won't be able to get rid of the sense of inferiority as a non-native speaker, who is not very good at grammar either. However, not everyone can have such chance to be a teacher, especially when you are staying here as Working Holiday. I can be confident about being qualified and accepted. I will be able to change my career any time in the future, but this is my chance to try hard to be an English instructor.

From the moment I change my way of thinking, my mind has been a little more cleared. (Am I too easy-going??) I'll have my second class tomorrow. It's going to be fun.

As I'm away from my friends, I feel like an observer. They start to live with their partners, get married, have children... Nobody ask me what I'm going to be or want to do. Time to time, I'm worried about my future. Will I be alone whole my life? Will I be successful as a teacher? Is this really a right job for me?? Where I'll be settle down??

Life is much harder and more complicated than I dreamed as a kid.