I never thought I'd enter the world of "blogging," but here I am! I finally got tired of losing all of these thoughts swirling around in my head, with no one to share them with, so I've decided to let them "out" into the world (whether it's ready or not!). Since parenting -- and writing books about parenting -- are such huge parts of my life, I'm going to try to focus my thoughts on that subject, but you never know when I'll slip in another "issue" just to get it off my chest!
This first post will be short as I make sure I've got this blogging thing all figured out -- and I think one of my twins is trying to knock down his bedroom door to get up from his nap -- but look for future posts from me. I've already got some great topics in mind!
When I watch the evening news or read newspaper articles about the war and poverty in the world, I can’t help but view them through the eyes of a mother. Somewhere out there are mothers just like me who are scared because their sons are fighting a war. Or they’re worried that they won’t have enough food to nourish their children. Or they can’t afford medical treatment for a sick child who is wasting away before their eyes. No matter what language they speak, what color they are or where they live, mothers all over the earth have the same hopes and worries for their children.
Even during times of happiness and prosperity, we all share the same experiences. How many mothers at this very moment are watching proudly as their little one takes his first step? How many children are holding their mother’s hand as they walk down the road to school? How many mothers are combing their daughter’s hair or tying their little boy’s shoes? These loving acts we perform with our children are universal. As human beings, we may not agree with each other’s politics, religion or personal preferences, but we all share that special love that only a mother has for her child.
Even though I have never been to China or India, Somalia or Norway, I still feel connected to the mothers who live there because I already know so much about the way they feel. And somehow I know that if I were to meet any one of them, there would be an immediate knowing—an instant acceptance—because our hearts are the same. Our primary wish in life is that our children are safe, healthy, and raised in peace.
Wouldn’t it be wonderful if only mothers could lead the world? Surely our great capacity to love would ensure that no child ever goes hungry, fights a war, or becomes jobless or homeless. We would see each other not as strangers in foreign lands, but as sisters unified by common goals and a fierce love for our children. Together, united as mothers, we could change the world for the better.
Most parents will tell you they’re happy they had children. But let’s face it, when you’re caring for young children all day, there are plenty of moments that make you less than happy—much less. When the kids are fighting, refusing to eat, disobeying your instructions, dawdling, or refusing to take their nap, it’s tough to find joy when you want to tear your hair out. Of course, there are enough good moments to make you realize how fortunate you are. When you hear your little one giggle or mispronounce a word, that precious moment just warms the heart and rekindles your love for your child. But when the day-to-day stresses outweigh those endearing moments, you might need some better strategies for increasing your happiness level:
Everyone’s grumpier with inadequate sleep and nutrition. Try to get some zzzz’s instead of staying up to watch TV, and make sure you’re not skipping meals in your haste to serve the kids.
Try to do more things that give you pleasure. The laundry can wait. Break out the Play-doh with the kids. Find joy in the little things. . . and don't feel guilty about it!
Source: pros and cons of putting father on birth certificate
Insert humor into your day. Talk to your kids in silly voices or pretend you’re Julia Child while fixing their breakfast. Laughter puts everyone in a good mood.
Don’t beat yourself up if you’re feeling stressed. Just because you’re having a rough time doesn’t mean you’re not a good parent. In fact, this is entirely normal!
Keep your relationship with your spouse strong. When you have marital problems, it spills over into your life with your children, making you more impatient. Make sure you and your partner find time to reconnect with each other.
Remember how lucky you are. When the kids’ noise is driving you crazy, think about how lonely you’d be if you’d never had kids. Appreciate the gift of parenthood.
Remind yourself that nothing lasts forever. Your kids won’t be throwing food on the floor in a few years, but neither will they be running up to you for kisses. Enjoy the good stuff while you can get it, and don’t sweat the bad stuff.