My biggest dream is to become a geiko... it has been since I was a young teenager. But I'm white, American, and 24 years old. And not nearly beautiful enough. And my Japanese is so bad... But I want to feel close to the karyukai no matter where I am in life because geiko will forever inspire me artistically and spiritually.
I think some Western girls dream of becoming geisha, but we know it is such a difficult mystery. I want to wear kimono every day and wear beautiful nihongami. I want to learn to sing and dance and play the shamisen and koto. Soon I will be 25 and this dream is thin like morning mist.
なくぬなら、まだほととぎす、ほととぎす
Spring has come to my window, finally, and perfumes my curtains with her cool, sweet breath. I've realized that no matter the season I am melancholy: I used to blame it on Spring's nostalgia, the sensual electricity of Summer, the artistic splendor of Autumn, and Winter's promise of magic... but I am melancholy no matter what. Luckily for me my feelings are not mutually exclusive! I can laugh and run and marvel at beauty, and still feel the worms of sorrow feeding at my gut, my heart.
Everything makes my blood boil, or else makes me feel nothing. Tonight is an awful night.
Spring has come to my window, finally, and perfumes my curtains with her cool, sweet breath. I've realized that no matter the season I am melancholy: I used to blame it on Spring's nostalgia, the sensual electricity of Summer, the artistic splendor of Autumn, and Winter's promise of magic... but I am melancholy no matter what. Luckily for me my feelings are not mutually exclusive! I can laugh and run and marvel at beauty, and still feel the worms of sorrow feeding at my gut, my heart.
Everything makes my blood boil, or else makes me feel nothing. Tonight is an awful night.