It was no one's fault that I'm moving on.
It was no one's fault that I was hurt.
It was no one's fault that I was lovelorn.
It was no one's fault that I gave up...

I gave up...

Yes.
I gave up...

I was hurt too much, and he never replied my message back, which so i couldnt get even a small gain of happiness.

As i told everyone, I was dead towards him...

He pretended to not see me... i died, near completely

After a long sleep, I got told that he has an interest in someone, and that someone felt the same. It was just a matter of fact of when they would admit and be together.

My reaction when i heard that was... surprising... even to myself.

I immediately went "time to move on", like i didnt even try to stop myself from letting him fly away from my head.
In fact, i felt so much lighter.

I admit, that it did hurt me, but it wasnt as much as you would think it was, as i was already dead for him...
I had no hope...
I was finding a reason to get him out of my life to be honest, and just at the right moment, a reason landed on my hand, and there was no way I would let it fly away.
I grasped the reason, and used it, fully.

I am now moving on
Which I have seen some progress.

I would be lying if I said that I felt nothing when I saw him with the girl, along with others already seeing them as a couple even though they arent.
It didnt hurt, it just went... boop... like a small tap, or a poke

I do see it as normal, as i thought that if I felt nothing, that would mean I liked him too less, too shallow...

I realised I didnt pay much attention to him, as i usually would before this.
I would memorise details of him, my eyes would follow him everywhere, anytime.

But today, it was different.

I went on to do whatever was in front of me.
I ignored his usual playful noisy voice when he talked to others.
I dont remember... anything to be honest (i said this in excitement with a smile on my face).

I, am starting to move on.
And, Im actually succeeding.

Though of course, Mr. K, i realised you're being awkward with me.
Not that i dont want to be myself or be normal, but you, yourself, isnt acting normal...
So please, tell me what to do :)

Its hard to move on if you're not acting normal, ya know?

03:37am
6th December 2017

From: hostel