Sept. 8
I've been making some pretty important decisions. I really want to become a happier person and I really want to surround myself with people who care about me and like me for who I am. I don't want to sit around waiting for people to be my friend. I want to rid myself of people who no longer care for me and be around those who do. I don't want to be walked on and I don't want to spend so much time being upset when people tell me they care but do nothing but show otherwise.
I deserve to be happy, to be cared about, and to be loved. Why waste time stressing over people who don't feel that way about me when I can spend time with people who do? I'm going to change things, even if it's difficult.
I deserve to be happy, to be cared about, and to be loved. Why waste time stressing over people who don't feel that way about me when I can spend time with people who do? I'm going to change things, even if it's difficult.

(*´;ω;`) Aoi...
I didn't notice or look until it was pointed out, but it's really sad seeing Aoi there alone on Ayabie's OHP. I got to wondering how long this might stand, how long before someone just says Ayabie is done. Like this, it still means, in a way, that Ayabie still exists, it's just Aoi alone. But I can't see him doing it alone, nor can I see him getting four new people and still calling it Ayabie.
It's worrisome. How much longer is all this going to keep up until it's gone? Why does everyone still have Ayabie things all over their blogs? Is it some sort of contract thing they can't get out of? It just makes me uneasy. I would think at least three of them would have made new blogs, sans the 'ayabie-' in the username. But it's like a false hope, a false feeling like everything is still the same even though there is such an unsettling feeling in the air. It's been a while now, if they left, they should have left. Seeing all these things that look the same...I don't like it anymore. I don't want to pretend nothing's changed anymore just so it won't start to hurt again. I really wish all that stuff was just gone from blogs, everywhere. Surely I can't be the only one bothered by it?
Maybe I won't be able to really feel settled until more time passes and see how things go. It just seems to be going really slowly, though apparently D-N-L already has a live?! That alone begs more questions but I don't want to think about it right now. I just want to be able to get over feeling so badly, I want to know things are going to be alright. I don't want to keep lingering onto hope of something that's not there anymore.
It's worrisome. How much longer is all this going to keep up until it's gone? Why does everyone still have Ayabie things all over their blogs? Is it some sort of contract thing they can't get out of? It just makes me uneasy. I would think at least three of them would have made new blogs, sans the 'ayabie-' in the username. But it's like a false hope, a false feeling like everything is still the same even though there is such an unsettling feeling in the air. It's been a while now, if they left, they should have left. Seeing all these things that look the same...I don't like it anymore. I don't want to pretend nothing's changed anymore just so it won't start to hurt again. I really wish all that stuff was just gone from blogs, everywhere. Surely I can't be the only one bothered by it?
Maybe I won't be able to really feel settled until more time passes and see how things go. It just seems to be going really slowly, though apparently D-N-L already has a live?! That alone begs more questions but I don't want to think about it right now. I just want to be able to get over feeling so badly, I want to know things are going to be alright. I don't want to keep lingering onto hope of something that's not there anymore.


