/-Diffusion of Blurred Anger
It’s not only this moment but also from centuries ago, it’s been propagated so long as a sign of warning, business society, firms in particular. Workforce usually get exposed to so many stress, frustration or anger. But they don’t really seem to reveal what they really feel due to the possibility that they might be sacked or disgraced by the act. Then, it turned out to be phenomena in which people hide out what they’ve mistaken or anything whatsoever that might become factor with which your boss, manager, and executive rake them over the coal. But as a matter of fact, they don’t notice when those negative feelings turn contagious. People might preach us in the name of mentoring, teaching, hope for our betterment. However whether the method works or not has yet to be seen clearly. Just A little negative remark can be a strongly contagious impact on people. When it comes to contagiousness, the catastrophically awful factor is that it doesn’t matter how strong the remark it would be. What matters most is how many people hear and if they react negatively or positively. For instance, a young man has just tweeted on twitter, and then media just took on it and spread it out. What happens then is people who slightly feel anger about it tend to express it more than they actually feel. Another example, a man get bullied in the school, and people in there didn’t take it seriously and jokingly mocked him. But if a courageous man shed a spot on him and appeals what’s going on to him on the internet, people in school or even people in public would mind it intensively. However, before prevalence of telecommunication, those had not been known explicitly. It had been overlooked, oversighted. It attracts very little attention until somebody else realize it.
I think people don’t know what kind of behavioural factor could be a pieces of the precursor to resentment. For me, I could feel those small things go extreme little by little by misdemeanour or disrespectful behaviour. Let’s imagine the clouds and Bolt of lightning represents anger. How we can tell the anger is about to come up? Approach of chunks of cloud, by temperature, by wind, right?
So then what does those represent?
I would say,
Cloud⇒Behaviour, Temperature⇒Voice timbre, pitch, tone, Wind⇒Direction of the conversation.
When blurred anger pops up here and there, it is equivalents to uncertain air movement is happening here and there and several elements in the air churn through and eventually kind of disorganized, showing up as small chunk of cloud, which resulting in anxiety, frustration in our mind. People don’t get anger with regular voice such as timbre, pitch and tone. They change their tone just like getting humid, stuffy in the air right before raining. Wind represents where the conversation goes to. It can be blaming somebody, or indication of gratitude or excitement. When the conversation starts, there are a listener and speaker and third person may turn up. When direction of the conversation get too specific, the wind becomes gale and causes strong stream into them in a meantime it causes friction as well. That friction is a key to resentment, snapping.
-Misconduct in Inter-communication
What is the problem in wrath, anger and being upset?
The answer consist in the quality of inter-human-communication. In the same way, imagine hurricane hit and rip through a country. What the resentment cause then is literally havoc.
That causes interception between people to people communications, transportation, and possibly crush down several houses. Metaphorically, the house indicate a place where people can feel at ease, feel comfortable when we come back from wherever.
The anger head off somebody’s will, could close the honest conversation, culminating in unintended consequences because the idea wasn’t tempered enough with antagonist.
All human being have billions of germs. Interestingly those germs, little shenanigans in and on our body can talk one another using specific chemical molecules substitute for language.
When our body get violated by intruder or riots by residents,, misconduct in intercommunication comes out.
What if people in a war cause misconduct in communication?
That would be good enough to obliterate one fortress.
Incapacitated communication leave the cloud looming and bring fear to us.
Feeling fear or feeling oppressed switch on our fight-fight mode in which our logical thinking function shuts down in the brink of emergency. In the emergency like you are chased by a lion as a lunch, people don’t use logical thinking like let’s dig up a hole, let’s calculate the velocity, let’s calculate the stamina that lion has. That shouldn’t be expected at all.
Totally those process of thinking make it way easier for it to get lunch.
Thinking in a totally opposite way, fear doesn’t give us good decision-making rather it might cause us desire to punch the one who’s preaching us.
So why people get mad, get out of control?
Because as an animal, we are not comprehensively trained to overcome emotional difficulties like lost of beloved one, anger, resentment, sorrow, feeling alone.
Insofar as I’ve gone through, I’ve never met any until it manifests to a worst, irremediable stage.
-Unfulfilled/Numbing selective emotion
Some of the people may numb a specific feeling like a weakness, vulnerability and your flaw.
But people are not hardwired for hiding selective emotion. So when people want to hide one specific emotion, feeling, animosity against somebody, we repress all kinds of feeling to some extent. Let me more specific. Let’s say a man have problem in their family, he hasn’t been treated well by all of members of his family, regarded only as money generator. As such, he didn’t feel belonging, love to the family. That is what his vulnerability is meant to be.
So do you think that man can express any feeling wholeheartedly other than about his family?
I cannot imagine that answer to be Yes.
So, emotion is not mass of our feeling. It is one existence.
If there is a big hole in it, we cannot simply get rid of it and let germs, darkness, bother in it, start to bother one’s feeling.
The point is feeling is all connected to your behavioural expression and feeling is not school of what you feel individually.
It won’t exist like here is the space for happy, anger, depression individually.
There is no cubicle in our mental space. Unfortunately, those are all connected.
So people who don’t acknowledge the vulnerability and show it up, and call for help to redeem what you cannot afford, you are never going to feel fulfilled.
-Eustress
In contrast to what I’ve said in this blogging, there is stress called Eustress that is coined by endocrinologist meaning good stress. So in fact, some stress can be an urge to push you forward to obtain what you want to have. For example, you make a promise, I am going to finish this project and the project leader treats something glamorous to me. During the project you feel really stressed by a thinking, however this effort is going to be booty for the glamourous.
Another example, your girlfriend snapped at you saying why you are always doing so.
It gives you excruciating fear, worry, regret, imagining you might lose her.
Provided you perceived it as Eustress, it gives you momentum to keep her or treat her much more gently. As cliché goes, we don’t really know how important it would be until it’s gone.
But if you take it just as stress, you might take it as a threshold to break up, to do without it and abuse her.
Anger can sometimes be Eustress but delicate care is required.
It’s important to deconstruct the anger and see through the implication behind the furious message. In any condition, it has to be the one requires profound care for you and for people get anger.
-Constructing trust/Empathy
To make vulnerability be a charming point, admirable, it’s important to get empathetic and construct trust. Those who build into trust, and empathy in the relationship are less likely to be caught up in holdup and malfunction. Every single thing on the earth have vulnerability, at the same time some exceeding point. Thus, we’ve got to be with vulnerability.
Which do think a better way to face it?
To hide it as long as you can or take it as a charming point?
Some handicapped people may feel this is a curse, but the other may take it as charming point and take on it to live with it forever. When you think it to be a shame, your mind-set work to propel it out of your mind, out of your possession, not to how to manage, how I could compensate for it. Belief will be a truth regardless of the fact. If you take it as a curse, it strangles you to the death, suffocates you or it works as special gift that create your inimitability.
You can see a couple of entrepreneur carving out business in internet communication or program, application making.
Those don’t necessarily mean they invented everything from the first.
They utilized parts of something, which can be versatile and useful but it wasn’t until they find a couple of means for that.
To be angry means to be really specific as written in analogy with weather change.
Then what could empathy be?
Empathy is a motion that enable our lens of mind widen out to see what we haven’t seen before.
We all have resources already. It won’t be herculean effort like taking up a piece of rock from Moon or take some hints out of pyramid.
We all have things needed to meet your requirements already that you ordered in fate.
Backing to the talk, how we would react if there isn’t prerequisite trust/empathy to connect sense of anger to eustress, positive momentum?
That will associate with animosity, hostility, taken as venoms spat.
-Fulfilment
A: Serving for the other initiatively give you a meaning for your life,
“Why I exist”, “Why I live”, unless you demand its return.
Without any clear reason and thinking but with a whim, you feel like you want to do something for the other. Do you think epoch-making people like who saved the world demanded returns?
I did this!! Where’s my booty, rewards?
Prominently famous people have absolute core of heart like indiscribable passion, empathy to help the other, which is inexorable.
It’s like you see somebody get fainted. If you doubt and spend a little moment to mull over a return, I might say you are so poor. I assume you pathetic.
Fulfilment comes when people serve for the other and people get happy.
And a doer doesn’t care if they are feeling grateful to my deed or not but care the consequence.
B: Fulfilment results from arising action of your own accord.
You may look at the introduction before you set about the project and see the purpose.
Bu that’s not enough. What you’ve possibly gotten through the fixed action is for your job,
You’ve signified your job for your salary but what about you?
Is there any cohesion between you and the project?
Create your own definition not judged, offended, by anyone else. Something that enables you to have determination with your own responsibility.
“Happiness is a state of inner fulfilment.” Matthieu Ricard.
“It’s not in the pursuit of happiness that we find fulfilment, it is in happiness of pursue.” Danis Waitley
As such fulfilment is not booty that you can get as a consequence following that instruction.
A piece of ingredients for fulfilment lies in the process in pursuing things you want to achieve.
-It’s important to feel enough, sufficiently contented
People are so ambitious to look for next, next, and next step
Never knows what stop is.
But does it sound efficient or motivating? Or does that motto, mind set are supposed to help you for perseverance?
People need to reframe life with finest frame, finest stage, and facing start and end over and over and acknowledge its progress otherwise we all burn out and exhausted, end up with reaching barely first minimum goal that you set.
But if you set your goal within a possible zone, you feel like motivated thinking what comes next? And Gain, and Gain, it didn’t feel so much longer than you expect.
Your fuel is never going to run shortage.
Finally, after life expectancy greatly lingered, people have got much tasks to think of further future to stay safe and no trouble.
But that brought us a sense badly through which we so wearily spend money and plan your life out but it may as well not be so challenging as it used to be.
With no fulfilling, with no responsibility for your life but for your job, for what you got born?
Just like observing the world and to do better after reincarnation? And get second life?
Who knows?
It’s about time that we may as well take it upon yourself to set path for your own goal not for saving people all over the world. Saving yourself comes first.