oh now, here is 4:42am, i cant sleep. 
i slept at 0:00, but then i woke at 3, until now, i cant fall asleep again, but johnny is still sleeping like a pig in his room. 
What a Baby... 
i think ive got the problem of insomnolence 
so i woke and play computer 
hai, im now 20 this yr, people can say we r still young, but can u imagine tht after a few yrs, like 7 sth, i wont be single or in a relationship anymore, but a wife to someone. thts a bit too fast for me. wts more, within 10yrs, i'll have a child, oh no~
am i getting older? i think im getting older as a teenager and heading to a nubile maiden.
im so afraid to get old, as ive to feel lots, work, stress, everything and death..
i dun want the people tht i love will leave me forever oneday, i dun really want to see this, my parents, fds, lover.
i feel so scared everytime when think of this! 
i dun want to be lonely, and i dun want to die.
i know after i died, memory would fade away, by times nobody would know who is Bernice again...
let it go, we all cant avoid this...
we can just enjoy everything we have, the time tht i be wf my parents, fds and lover.
try my best to get them sth good....haha, thts means i needa work harder whenever.
cheer up, i still get lots of time, moments, years to live wf them and i know i need to spice things up ! 
btw, wowo reminded me tht we have to find fds which depends on quality not quatity, so no worries.
in this half yr, seem i havent got any improvement, yet going backward. 
a 1500words essay has been finished, but ive got another assignment to hand on 13th and a test on 11th. time is tight. wt the hell?
and in jan, ive got another 3000 words essay to hand on 25th and a test on 29th...
i dun know whether i can truly relex during my x'mas or not ..
maybe all this lead to my problem of insomnia.
hope thts not.
anyway, i'll back on 18th and arrive 19th 17:50 
and leave back to uk on 1st morning,
my x'mas holiday isnt last long in hk, just within 2 weeks, hope i can totally enjoy all these without the worries on any of my coursework. 
i dun know whether ive to find someone to give me any extra lessons on my accounting or not.
i know tht will shorten my playing time, but this is my opportunity to ask this well.
anyhow, ive to enjoy and do lotz shopping during x'mas. 
god, i really wanna go disneyland.
I LOVE CHRISTMAS,,,,
BABY, I REALLY WANNA STICK WF U ! 
MY DEAR, I'LL ALWAYS UPDATE MY BLOG & XANGA, SO AS UPDATING MY EVERYTHING TO U AS WELL
finally figure out .. 
i gonna handle it more ...
temp in uk is getting lower & lower.... 
but luckily i'll back to hk for having my x'mas holiday....
ive to crazy buying !!! 
