I know I’ll be able to find someone on discord who is willing to take care of me. Even if I have to be someone I’m not, I’ll make sure to get that attention I so desperately need. I can’t get my hopes too far up, because the chances of me being able to do this, especially with my limited knowledge of modern internet slang, are looking pretty slim.
I don’t get it though? I see guys complaining online all the time that they want to talk to women, they want to game with women, they want women friends. Well, we’re literally right here, dying of loneliness. Because it’s not our companionship you actually want. This is why I need to learn how to be comfortable being more intimate with women, because otherwise I’ll end up alone forever. I mean who knows, maybe I won’t totally hate it. I just don’t see myself trusting someone that much. And as someone who won’t even touch cat vomit, I’m pretty sure I’m going to have some sanitation issues…
I just hope they don’t make the girl feel awkward because it would NOT be personal. I really really really wish I didn’t have to do this… but I think the bar in Japan is a great place to start. I’ll be able to invite girls back to my room until trains run, and, well… I guess we’ll see what happens.