I scared of people
I was born as an introvert people,for those who doesn't know what is introvert, Introvert is when you get close with people or surronding with people you'll be sick, you gonna befeel scare,feel uncomfortable.And I has that, I was an very introvert people. In myfirst year in the school I don't havefriends because I hard to makefriends. I always scare to talk to them, to people that I don't know yet.I rather play by my self in school than with myfriends, I gotfriends is because my mom told to myfriends to accompany me while I was in the school.I think that sucks, because of that I oftenfight with them I mean, I'm difficult person I cannot do what I donot like. It is very hard to understanding, even me some times I hard feel what I want.Every year in a school I always had a difficult withfriends, Until I write down this articel I didn't have a Bestfriends.I don't know what the spesification of Bff, I don't know how people call theirfriends as their bff I mean that the person who call as bff is already know what is your problem, yourfamily all everthing about you?..How can people tell everthing to someone, actually as an Introvert people is hard to tell something to someone even afamily, I usually just silent, just save the problem in my mind, or maybe I got something I just keep silent, and if I want to tell somebody I must think about it 100x is it important to tell them is it right, what if theyfelt uncomfortable when I tell them and some many thoughts that will make me, nah just keep that by myself.As introvert people is very hard, when in the school I had to go to the canteen and that place is very crowded itfeels like I need to go home, the atmosphere just like choke me, and my bad habits when Ifeel Uncomfortable I will get cranky and looks like angry.I remember when I was in the my aunty's house, and I want to buy something in her infront of house but suddenly there are groups of people in there, and I be like nah, I'm not gonna buy that stuff then my dad said why you so scared of people.I don't know I just feels like uncomfortable if I met or get surrounded with people I don't know.Being like this, make me have a little that I can call them asfriends,friends that I mean is they are talk to me when they need me. I need them, or I just know their name.. I almost never talk with myfriends about my personality, In my mind I always want to talk with them about my hobby, my crush the guy that I like, the girl that I hate,favorite show or etc, but I can't..I always thought what if they don't like me, I make they hate me, they didn't like me..But today my Introvert is getting down, if in the early age is about 90% but today is gonna be 75%, I still scare to talk to the people that I don;t know even know I involve my self to the some club, meet new people, hang out with new people but just some of them get with me, not close with me, just get along I mean we talk, someday we hang out and someday we just don't talk yeah something like that..very complicated, and also I was born as J race but myface is like a C race, that is also make me hard to makefriends because of racist. Sometimes I just think seeing people have alot offriends hangout together talk together about personality, just how come, Ifind itreally hard.One conclusion is I'm a difficult person.
