nothing really special happened to me, just the same ole same ole


hating my job and the dick heads that work with me

on the internet 24/7

paying bills

sleeping

cutting

fighting the thoughts in my head

introspective thinking


just my boring life (i dont even have one)



sometimes i wonder if im better off dead, well i dont know, maybe im disappointed how my life turned out, how i turned out and the mistakes i made.


but everybody makes mistakes, big and small


well anyway, lately, i been cutting alot, mostly at work, i carry a razorblade with me. i cut on my thighs.

i just gets so stressed out and frustrated, but i feel better when i do it.


i now its not healthy and bad for me


i also been listening to flyleaf alot. i love their music, it inspires me to face another day with a smile on face, and also the girls vioce, and the guitar riffs are really powerful.

i had to do without internet and cable for a while, because i move to a new location,


but i just got it back today.


im so happyにゃ


my new house is alright, its just that the AC doesnt get the rooms as cool like the apartments, i guess im so used to living there.


i like it when the rooms are really cold, i sleep better.


oh well, i guess i'll have to wait until winter, i love cold weather


i went to see our new house, it was okay, look pretty good, not big and fancy (i hate being poor) (T_T), i guess i never gave it a chance,


i hate change so much


it's just that i hate moving, im so used to staying in the apartment. it takes me a long time to adjust to a new environment, and feel comfortable with it


im staying in the apertment for a few days to clean up the mess, its empty. but i like it this way, nothing but cigarettes, tv, internet and alittle food


its not going to last long though, my mother is returning the key, sometimes this week


it'll be really funny if the manager comes in and see me sleeping on the floor嬉しいw

so.... were moving into that shitty house so, i want be having internet for a while


i really dont want to live to there.


im never going to go outside, going to probably quite my shitty job



lately i been eating alot, and i probably gained so much weight, like, what the fuck is wrong with me, i guess its because im on my period right know. im going to try to stop eating for awhile,


going to starv myself to death, atleast i'll be super skinny.


i just cant stop thinking about that shitty house we might move into. i really hope we move into an bigger appartment. its not that im picky, its just that it doent look nice


i just sick of the disappointments that occur in my life


its not fucking fair


i been cutting again, because i gave in to the urges

last night i called my job and lied to my manager that i couldnt come in


i hope it doesnt come back and bite me in the ass, i hate lying, but i felt that i really needed that day off


fridays are really hectic. im pretty sure they dont mind

now my checks going to short


oh well

i went to see the house were moving into and its shitty as fuck.プンプン

nothing nice never happen to me,


but, what ever


right now i feel like i want to kill myself to be honest


its not fair the way life treats me


im just going to hope that we wOnt stay in it long, and move into something better


My night last night at work was okay, nothing special happen.


time flew by so fast


plus i got my paycheckハート, im going to go and try to pay some of my bills, and hopefully do alittle shopping

you can't really do what you want, and plus theyre other people living around you


especially the fucking managers. i hate her i hope she gets ran over buy a 18 wheelerプンプン


im kinda upset right know so........whatever


im going to go smoke (-_-)

I hate working on fridays,fwff its the day when a lot of dumbass customers come in.


Like tonight, there this fucking drunk ass women and her friend orderd some food, got a miunderstanding,

and started bitching.


It was really funny yet annoying to me.


but whatever


i didnt let it bother me( ̄へ  ̄ 凸