Even as a Life Coach, I have my challenges with my 3 teens. Talking and having regular discussions is the crucial element for successful parenting. When I had the same stuck state with my youngest daughter now 14, simply this morning. I attempted to stay as calm as I can. I was grieving how I got into this stuck state. She appeared to be venting about how irritating I was. She might not relate to the particular incidents when I asked her what was the annoying part.
Perception
She shared that when she talk to me, she felt that I thought it was a wild-goose chase and leave. It's so interesting to hear how she view what I do. When I hear her tone of voice that sounded mad, I walk away thinking she did not need an response from me and likewise. I did not wish to remain in that energy and get set off into being angry myself. We spoke about facial expressions and tone of voice. She felt that she was not mad. So we had different perception and viewpoint. The good thing was we were speaking our minds.
Empathise
What she desired from me was to empathise by stating "Relax. relax, each time when she complain about something or is stressed out." All she desired is for me to listen right through and comfort her! That was an insight, a tip not to be distressed by her tone of voice or venting. Not to think that she wants a option. That was a mini-revelation.
Comprehending each other
I said to her that it is really important to keep having a discussion like this so that we get to understand each other much better. We do have downs and ups , and there is no caution. We talked a bit about my menopause and her hormonal agents modifications. How these changes in our body can play havoc to our moods. The most crucial is to return to the basics. Just workout and let the hormonal agents balance. The other essential thing is to let and forgive go of our past stories so that we don't spiral into drama.
The downs and ups is part of the journey and that's how we change, grow and learn . By continuing to talk, have Helpful hints dialogues like this, that is the trick to effective parent and teenagers relationships. Relationships are established through the effort we put into our interactions. Comprehending what each other is thinking.
Do not bring your role from work to home
she said, "There is no such thing as perfect parent." I totally agreed with her. She added, "I simply desire you to be a regular parent." I was questioning what is a normal parent. She said, "Just like when you are a principal, when you go home do not end up being a principal, so strict with your kids." Ha! I got it. She stated, "Don't bring your coaching thing home." We simply don't want to hear you training us. Thanks for advising me!
Positive Feedback
I shared with her that I am very happy with her, highlighting how she have lists for her to-do-list. How she kept to her word. I like it when she speak calmly. The ending was sweet. She fried omelet for me. My feedback to her was that this small gesture revealed that she looks after me and I am really grateful, I like it. Time to commemorate.
Simply this morning when I had the same stuck state with my youngest child now 14. I was grieving how I got into this stuck state. When I asked her what was the irritating part, she might not relate to the specific events.
Just workout and let the hormones balance. We just do not desire to hear you training us.