Mother's Day♥︎

Today's Mother's Day. I've written a few letters for her to show my gratitude by far.

Sometimes, though, I forgot about it, being arrogant and naive.
And I did something that shouldn't be forgiven.
I sometimes hurt her and she hurt me.

Still I love her so much. She is the most careful, generous, kind, beautiful, intelligent, and bright person i've ever met. I am so glad that she gave birth to me. I am such a lucky person that I should be grateful to her for ever, no matter what.

She always gave me what I needed and what she thought was important for me.

Since I am going to live abroad from this year, it might be the last chance to say thank you to her. I don't know. Only God knows that.

In retrospect, I was a naughty girl as a kid and shouted loud whenever something didn't work well. haha
Because of my intense personality, I think I must have made her baffled. I am truly sorry for that.

I am so extremely grateful for all the help I have been given by her along my nineteen years and I just wanna say thank you to her.
But I don't think that is enough.



It takes a while but I will do want to give something back to my family after everything they sacrificed for me, by becoming who I truly want to be in the future.

To tell the truth, I applied to Ivy schools because I thought I could help my family, but at the end of the day, it didn't work. I neither screamed nor cried though. I was just mortified by it.

However, I realised that there are many things I can do for them. It is not that fame but contribution–––––contribution to others who need my help.
I still don't know yet what to do but hopefully i will find it in England.
Nothing could deter me from moving forward, right?

Don't be coward.
If I could do something for others enough to make a difference in their lives, her life would be much brighter than now because I am not sure at all if I am helping her.


Now I am thinking why I love writing English so much. It is because my sentence itself always give me hope and assurance that I can be successful. It is my mirror and friend. Sounds strange? ^^ I am a girl like that.


Thank you, mum. I love you for ever. ♥︎♥︎

Cherry Blossom

About a month ago I walked amongst the cherry blossoms in the vicinity of my uncle's house.
I was deeply impressed by the beautiful colour that I can see solely in spring.

It reminded me of my grandfather, who passed away last year. Whilst he and I were walking around a city in Nagasaki for travelling, we stopped by a small park where cherry blossom bloomed.

He took some pictures and stared at them for a while. I took a picture of his back, not cherry blossoms.
I was not quite interested in cherry blossoms, but recently I am fascinated by not only its beauty but also Japanese aesthetics; they find something that is about to fade away beautiful.

Life is irreversible, unpredictable, chaotic, tragic, but beautiful.
Nothing is the same.
You cannot do the same things exactly as you did before.
You change even though you are not aware of it.

You certainly change no matter how strongly you believe that you will not change.
It seems to me that this is how things work: We meet new people and new things so that you can forget about bad experiences or others who do not exist or are not there for you, which makes you think in a different way and sometimes spur you to move forward with vigour.

"Treasure every meeting, for it will never recur."

Truly. Though my granddad is not here any longer, he is always an important person in life and I still cherish memory with him just like I keep the picture of sakura in the folder of my camera.

People do not want accept identities that others give to them. Neither do I. I don't want to define myself as "shy, reticent, lazy" or things like that.
Nothing is the same, so do not try to stay the same. Stay different.


If I am about to underestimate myself, I often try to believe that I have the ability to make every experience count.
While my granddad was alive, I was pretty naive back then; however, I matured as an individual and I wish he would admit it.

Beginning of Everything

I started this blog to share my moment and thoughts with others, especially my friends, that come to my mind very time I discover new things. Since I am a reticent person, I don't quite speak out what I am truly thinking, but I love writing and thinking about the world.