Even as a Life Coach, I have my challenges with my three teens. Talking and having routine discussions is the key element for successful parenting. Simply today when I had the exact same stuck state with my youngest daughter now 14. I attempted to remain as calm as I can. I was grieving how I entered into this stuck state. She appeared to be venting about how irritating I was. When I asked her what was the annoying part, she could not connect to the particular occurrences.
Perception
She shared that when she talk with me, she felt that I believed it was a wild-goose chase and leave. It's so intriguing to hear how she view what I do. I leave believing she did not require an response from me and likewise when I hear her tone of voice that sounded angry. I did not wish to stay in that energy and get activated into being angry myself. We discussed facial expressions and tone of voice. She felt that she was not angry. So we had various understanding and point of view. The good idea was we were speaking our minds.
Empathise
What she wanted from me was to empathise by stating "Relax. relax, each time when she grumble about something or is stressed out." All she wanted is for me to listen right through and comfort her! That was an insight, a tip not to be distressed by her tone of voice or venting. Not to think that she desires a service. That was a mini-revelation.
Understanding each other
I said to her that it is really crucial to keep having a discussion like this so that we get to comprehend each other better. We do have ups and downs , and there is no warning. We talked a bit about my menopause and her hormonal agents modifications. How these modifications in our body can play havoc to our moods. The most important is to return to the basics. Simply exercise and let the hormones balance. The other essential thing is to forgive and let go of our past stories so that we don't spiral into drama.
The downs and ups is part of the journey and that's how we alter, grow and find out . By continuing to talk, have dialogues like this, that is the trick to successful parent and teens relationships. Relationships are developed through the effort we put into our interactions. Understanding what each other is thinking.
Don't bring your function from work to home
she said, "There is no such thing as perfect parent." I absolutely agreed with her. She included, "I just want you to be a normal parent." I was questioning what is a regular parent. Then she stated, "Just like when you are a principal, when you go home do not become a principal, so strict with your children." Ha! I got it. She said, "Don't bring your coaching thing house." We just don't want to hear you training us. Thanks for reminding me!
Positive Feedback
I showed her that I am really pleased with her, highlighting how she have lists for her to-do-list. How she kept to her word. When she speak calmly, I like it. The ending was sweet. She fried omelet for me. My feedback to her was that this small gesture showed that she looks after me and I am extremely grateful, I enjoy it. Time to celebrate.
Just this morning when I had the same stuck state with my youngest daughter now 14. I was grieving how I got into this stuck state. When I asked her what was the annoying part, she could not relate to the particular incidents.
Just workout and let the hormones balance. We just don't want Continue reading to hear you training us.